Breaking the Broken
by xo going nowhere
Summary: A long year and a half had seperated them. She thought it was for eternity, but he just couldn't stay away. And just like that, they're back together, poised to take over it all. But there are some who aren't willing to take that lying down..
1. Welcome To A Cruel World

**Breaking the Broken**

_One_

Welcome To The Cruel World

_------------------_

_Despite those titles, power, and pelf,  
The wretch, concentred all in self,  
Living, shall forfeit fair renown,  
And, doubly dying, shall go down  
To the vile dust from whence he sprung,  
Unwept, unhonoured and unsung._

Walter Scott

_------------------_

The sweeping grounds consisting of lush gardens and green grounds were picture perfect, but she didn't care. From where she stood, the perfectly manicured lawn, and the large brick building, and the elegant ivy covered walls were a prison, one that she was about to be bailed out of. Sure, some people thought that her recovery wasn't quite complete, but after she charmed over all her counselors and blackmailed the head of the institution, there was a unanimous decision to release her. In the long year and a half that she'd been there, she'd become the undisputed queen of the center. While some would use the time to repent and reflect, she found a much better use for her time—plotting spectacular revenge. It was a welcome distraction from the only other thing that had occupied her thoughts… a gorgeous blonde boy whose voice filled her head when it finally got quiet.

She was not deluded enough to think that everything would be rainbows and butterflies from this point on. Her fall from grace was a **big deal**. Fortunately, she was only one teen in a society of fuck ups, and this was the one time in her life where the porcelain skinned brunette with the electrifying green eyes was happy to blend in with the crowd. However, while everyone else may be willing to forgive and forget, she most certainly wasn't. A woman's reputation is all that she has, her mother had always told her, and that was one of the only bits of advice she ever took to heart. Most of her words were lost in a drunken stupor or slurred by botox injections, but occasionally mommy dearest came out with a few gems. Lately, she had been doubting the truth behind those words. She had something else… or at least, she _did_. That was most troubling of all. The one other person on the entire planet that she had actually cared about, ripped away from her. She'd gain her reputation back soon enough, but death would never return him to her.

And for that, nothing could save that Bible-thumping hick from the wrath of the petite girl.

The heavy wooden doors of the clinic swung open, shaking her from her thoughts. She started abruptly, but subtly, so that she was the only one to know that she had ever not been fully present. Vacancy in patients supremely concerned the counselors there. Imagine that. Keeping up her large, beaming smile, she knew that there was only one person who would ever be able to tell that it wasn't genuine, and realized with a pang of heartache that he would never smirk at her ability to con a crowd again. Waving her hand slightly back and forth, like royalty addressing her subjects, she spoke quietly, but they hung on her every word.

"Now, I would like to thank you all for the kind treatment you've given me during my stay here. You made it very enjoyable for me, and I do consider some of you my very_best friends_! I wish you all luck in your recoveries, and I promise to visit soon."

They lapped it up because that's what they wanted to hear, but deep down, they all knew that however kind and beautiful the girl in front of them was, she would leave without a backwards glance. Showered in hugs and praises, she waited patiently for them to just let her go. She'd waited long enough for her freedom.

"I'm so sorry your parents couldn't be here to get you, honey," a kindly older counselor sympathized with a pat on the shoulder. Imperceptibly, the young woman flinched away.

"Oh, it's alright. They've very busy people, I'm sure it's important. I wouldn't want to put their lives on hold just for little old me. Besides, I told you that I would rather make a quiet departure. You know that's why I told everyone not alert the papers, my friends, even distant family members that I was being released. I think its best that everybody gets on with their lives as usual," she lied through her teeth. She received a final hug from everyone, and exited the room with as much dignity and grace as possible. In a dusky green dress with a lace-up back and silver trim and matching sparkling silver heels, she had rarely felt more alive than she did with the wind whipping her dress around her knees and her hair across her face, knowing that there wasn't a chance in hell she'd ever end up in a place as bad as the one she'd just left.

"Thank God she's gone."

"I know! I could never get any rest with her around!"

"Would that be because she warned you to sleep with one eye open after you used her shampoo?"

"No! It was because she used to cry out in her sleep. Remember? Something about a guy named… Sebastian? I think that was it."

"Of course it was. Sebastian Valmont? Ring a bell?"

"Oh my God!"

"He was so hot!"

"I was totally in love with him when I still lived in New York!"

"He was my first time!" an excited girl shouted out, but when faced with the incredulous stares of the other girls, she relented. "Don't worry, I know I wasn't his…"

"Jesus, almost every girl I know was in a state of freaking depression when he died!"

"_She_ knew _him_?"

"Did you even read that fucking journal? He was completely obsessed with her!"

"Yes, vicious nightmares that poor dear used to have. I hope that she can finally make peace with herself," the kindly matron swooped in and said, ending the conversation for the time being. A cluster of the girls still left in rehab stood in the large marble foyer, watching the girl they had loved to hate and hated to love make her graceful exit down the cobblestone pathway that lead to a long driveway, that lead to the gates, which lead to the road, which led her out of their lives forever. Or so they thought, as they gossiped about her every step of the way.

_Let them talk, they're the suckers stuck here_, she thought with her back to the building as a cruel smile twisted her lips in place of the Mary Sunshine act she'd been putting in place for the better part of her life. Not one to dwell on her misery, but rather on the misery she caused others, she could already see the havoc she would secretly wreak upon her return. He wouldn't be there to share in her triumph, and the thought was almost too painful to bear, but she would make him proud.

Almost at the end of the long driveway, the black wrought iron gates swung open, and she was surprised by the absence of a limo. But not nearly as surprised as she was by the presence of an emerald green 1956 Jaguar Roadster. Or the boy leaning against it, wearing mirrored sunglasses, a gray suit, a dusky green shirt and a typically unreadable expression. She smiled wryly for a second, the only thought she was able to process was '_We match… we match… our clothes match, even now… we match_' as disbelief fogged her brain.

"Happy to see me?" he smirked, prompting her to regain her sense of speech.

"Y-y-you **_died!_**"

"Change of plans," he shrugged nonchalantly.

"You… lied to everybody?" she struggled for words, trying to suppress the feeling of elation she received when she first laid eyes upon him, while trying to hold back the tears that were forming behind her eyes.

"Pretty much."

"You lied to _me_?"

"No! It wasn't like that…"

"So you are dead?"

"No…"

"Then you lied?"

"I suppose so," he answered dryly.

"We've never lied to each other," she spat bitterly, a single tear sliding down her smooth, pale cheek. His eyes widened at the presence of that tear, for neither had ever been one to show much emotion.

"This was in your best interest."

"Having me ruined and shipped off to this nuthouse was **_in my best interest_**!" she roared, her previously cool façade gone. Now she was livid with anger, at his betrayal, at the unfairness of it all.

"Maybe not that part," he conceded with a little smile.

"I hate you," her words dripped with venom, her eyes hard and cold, and she turned, ready to walk away from him for good and hoping against hope that he wouldn't let her.

"I came back for **you**," he called desperately. She turned, her interest now piqued.

"I traveled all over the world, saw a lot of things, did a lot of things, I was living an even better life than the one we've always known. But I was stupid, because it was all nothing without you. I'm nothing without you. Just like you're nothing without me. C'mon babe, we've always known that we're two of a kind," he whispered, his voice soothing, with little space between them now, his hand caressing her cheek. Her eyes softened as her arms came around his neck. She hugged him tightly, closing her eyes, as if afraid it would be her last time. Opening her eyes slightly, she realized how stupid she was being, and opened her eyes fully, regaining her composure, and slapping him hard upside the head. He said nothing, just held on a little tighter. No more words were needed at this moment, as he got into the car and opened the door for her. Getting in, she put on her sunglasses and gave him a trademark smirk. With this, Kathryn and Sebastian were back in action, God help us all. As the car roared away from the Methadone Clinic, the brunette said ten words to her equally gorgeous blonde companion, releasing his true laugh, a golden sound that made her heart soar, even though she'd **never** admit it.

"You have got a fuckload of explaining to do, asshole."

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.:cringes and hides under computer desk:. So, what did you guys think? This is my first attempt at Cruel Intentions fanfiction, but I'm absolutely addicted to it lately. Anyway, an idea for this story popped into my head **_really_** early this morning and wouldn't let me sleep until I cranked out at least part of it. Looking back over it, I realize that it bears a little resemblance to Sky Samuelle's story _Quid Pro Quo_, and that was totally unintentional. (But that story is wonderful, and everyone should go check it out) After this chapter, that won't be the case, becausethe story takes an entirely different tone, because I was planning on incorporating some of the characters from CI3. Um, yeah, that's enough from me, so please review and tells me what you guys think. Thanks for reading!

Xo Sam

**Disclaimer**: I think we all know that I don't own any of this…


	2. The Second Merteuil

**Breaking the Broken**

_Two_

The Second Merteuil

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_Hatred is active, and envy passive dislike_

_There is but one step from envy to hate_

Goethe

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Merteuil was a name to be respected, no matter how many failures are in the family. Those people are to be overlooked until redeemed, or disowned if they couldn't cut it. The cost of living like this was high, but the rewards were endlessly satisfying. If you could cover your ass well enough, you could have anything you want.

Those were lessons that all the girls learned at young ages. While boys could run wild so long as they had cute dimples, girls must be prim, proper, polite, pretty, and prudent. There were plenty of other words with P's that described what a young girl in high society must be like, but those five were drilled into the heads of a Merteuil from birth. Prudence, or discreetness, was something that all of them had been particularly gifted at, especially Kathryn. But in the end, she got caught, and off she went.

Cassidy was determined not to make the same mistake.

Beautiful, brown haired, brown eyed Cassidy. She was the new pride and joy of the Merteuil family, and couldn't be happier. Sure, she felt bad about **_dear_** Kathryn being outed, but that really wasn't her problem. The family had had to flee to the west coast to escape the student body president's scandal, and though it royally pissed off Cassidy that she had had to leave her cushy townhouse and her mindless minions, she was secretly thrilled. New location, new guys, new start where nobody knew Kathryn and how "wonderful" she was. Cassidy was the god they worshiped in California. She wouldn't have it any other way.

Applying eye shadow above her large, cold eyes, Cassidy admired herself in the mirror. She had always been gorgeous, everyone thought so. She had flawless skin, shiny hair, large pretty eyes, straight features… she could go on and on. She would too, if she weren't running late. But there was only one person that she could never win against.

_Kathryn._

Oh, how she loathed her cousin Kathryn. Perfect, dainty, brilliant Kathryn, who was always more interesting, more educated, more beautiful, landing better boyfriends and better positions. It had always been an unspoken competition between the two. Kathryn had usually been the victor, but occasionally Cassidy came out on top. Smiling smugly, she went over the past year and a half of her life, and knew that this was one of those times.

Worse yet, Cassidy knew that Kathryn had never obsessed over her as much as she did. Kathryn had only cared long term about one person, and that person was long gone. Cassidy only came to Kathryn's mind when she had accomplished something or failed at something, meanwhile Kathryn remained in Cassidy's mind at all times, even if it was just in a small, back part of it. Perhaps the reason that she despised her most was because she admired her more than anyone she had ever known. That sort of hero worship was painfully embarrassing for a Merteuil woman to experience.

Rolling her eyes, Cassidy checked her reflection a last time before exiting her exquisite bedroom, walking down the sweeping marble staircase to the exterior of her beachfront mansion. A limo was waiting, but her parents weren't.

"So sorry Miss Merteuil. Your parents wanted to be here, but they had other obligations on this day," Arthur, the elderly British chauffeur explained.

"Because I was expecting them," she sneered sarcastically, impatiently waiting for him to open the door, and sliding in smoothly once he did. She hadn't been expecting her parents to be home to say goodbye to her. After all, she was only leaving for college. They hadn't been there when she left for freshman year, why would they be there for sophomore? It caused her a slight pang to realize that there was no one to wish her farewell. Inadvertently, her thoughts swung to Sebastian Valmont. This surprised even her. Cassidy hadn't thought about him in a very long time, not since word of his death reached her so long ago. She remembered that day clearly.

"What a waste. He was a _really_ good fuck," Cassidy mused aloud, repeating what she had first thought that fateful day a year and a half ago. But she remembered that afterwards, after she let him have her, he hadn't said much.

_He hadn't even fallen asleep, just wrote in his journal for a little while, and then stared at her, an unreadable expression on his face. Roughly thirty minutes later, his cell phone rang. She told him to just let it go, cuddling up against him, but he immediately disentangled himself from her, reaching for it._

_"Valmont," he said professionally, with a mocking tone to his voice. Cassidy smiled at him fondly. He was so gorgeous, and now he was hers. His handsome features began to cloud over. She couldn't figure out what was being said to him, but it couldn't be good. Cassidy was unable to distinguish the words, but she could tell that it was a female voice, and that the voice was hysterical. _

_"Oh my God… okay, calm down… calm down baby, it'll be okay… I'll be there in a few minutes. Okay? Relax. I'll be there," he said calmly, but there was a panicked look in his blue eyes. _

_**Baby?** Who the hell was he talking to?' Cassidy wondered, angry now. He appeared to have all but forgotten about her lying there, naked in the bed as he raced around the room, muttering to himself as he tossed his rumpled clothes on. _

_"Sebastian?" she inquired._

_"Wha—oh, yeah, I'm really sorry Cassie. I've got to run. A… friend has an emergency," the words slid smoothly from his lips as he pulled on his shirt and put on his sunglasses. However, the dark lenses didn't prevent him from seeing the crestfallen look on the pretty girl's face. "Cassie… that was amazing. I'll call you, okay?"_

_He didn't wait for a response, just kissed her twice, softly on the lips, and then once on the forehead before slipping quietly out of the room. _

He never called.

The next time she saw Sebastian was at a Merteuil family party. Kathryn stuck to him like glue, their arms linked together. They had always looked good standing next to each other. Their heights complimented each other perfectly, and they always matched their clothing in a way that was so classy, it couldn't be tacky. He was so naturally graceful and confident, and she was so poised and elegant and they were both so good looking that they were just a picture of perfection.

Cassidy made eye contact with him, and he smiled slightly at her, allowing her heart to soar. However, none of this went unnoticed by her cousin. The petite brunette subtly checked if the coast was clear before leaning up, sensually licking the jaw line of her stepbrother before placing a kiss on his cheek. Interest piqued, Sebastian was now focused solely on Kathryn, which was hardly unusual and exactly the way she wanted it. Cassidy instantly knew that her cousin was the one Sebastian had run to after their time together, and a combination of despair, envy, bitterness and anger boiled together inside of her, a lethal mixture indeed. Kathryn's eyes met Cassidy's across the room, a clash of brilliant green and deep brown. Her message was clear.

**_Mine_**.

Honestly, it was better that Cassidy didn't have a boy to tie her down. It was a tough job, being the most wanted girl at Prestridge University, but somebody had to do it. And if anybody else tried to, she'd destroy them. It occupied most of her time, as cover-ups were often difficult. But hey, they were necessary. If you want to be the girl all the guys would like to fuck and all the girls would like to be, you have to make sure that they don't know that it was _you_ who circulated those pictures…

The limo slowed to a stop outside the administration offices of Prestridge University, the prestigious college she'd been attending the previous year. Straightening out her leopard print skin and sleek black shirt, she waited a moment to regain her poise as she stepped out of the limo. The first person she saw was Jason Argyle. She exchanged air kisses and a few words with him. God, he was easy.

Cassidy had known that Jason was in love with her from their first meeting. Some guys were just too predictable. Since then, he had tried anything and everything to get her into bed with him, but nobody pulls one over on a Merteuil. He was hot; she would give him that one. But there were plenty of appealing males on campus. Cassidy actually wouldn't have minded having sex with Jason if he posed any challenge whatsoever. Unfortunately for him, he didn't. Now, it was more a game to her. Get him worked up, and leave him high and dry.

Their conversation was interrupted by an unfortunate looking new student with an annoying voice and a loud cough. He was frantically arguing with the man in charge of room assignments over _something_. Who cares? Patrick Bale. That was his name. Disgusting little creature he was. As he passed, having lost his argument for a private room, Cassidy couldn't resist tossing in a snide little remark.

"A moment of silence… for his roommate," she sneered. Surprisingly, he didn't blush or slump down, but fixed her with a glare. If looks could kill, she'd be six feet under, just like dearly departed—

"Miss Merteuil? Your room is ready…"

"Excellent," Cassidy said, waving her hand as a goodbye to Jason. He frowned, clearly not wanting their time together to be over, but she had better things to worry about than his feelings.

------------

_Author's Note_

Oh my God guys… thank you so much for your reviews! Honestly, I wasn't sure many people still read CI. I know **I** do, and I'm pretty sure that I always will, but you never know about other people. Anyway, I was really happy to get them and thank you all for your kind words.

Kerimack- Wow. I made **your **day? That's different... your stories usually make mine! Lol. Btw- I totally agree with you. We need more CI fanfics!

_So this chapter was an introduction to Cassidy, because I'm going to include characters from all Cruel Intentions-es. Well, maybe not 2, just because that movie completely sucked. Although I probably went a little heavy on her envy of Kathryn, I wanted to really drill it in, because it's an integral part of who she is and what this story might become. .:whistles innocently:. I was going to wait a little while to post this chapter, but I was feeling really inspired after yesterday, and I figured I'd just post the chapter once I was finished with it. I haven't quite mastered the art of time between updates lol. Oh well… Anyway, thank you all for reading, and please review and let me know if this totally sucked lol. _

_Xo Sam_


	3. At The Graves

**Breaking the Broken**

_Three_

At the Graves

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_No amount of effort can make a naturally wicked man _

_Be turned into an honest one_

_However long you boil water,_

_It is impossible to make it burn like fire _

Saskya Pandita

-------------------------------------------

A Wednesday morning with bright sunshine and chirping birds surrounded the young woman. A single tear dripped down her cheek, followed by another, then two more, as she stood in the shadows cast by the tombs. It had been one year, six months, four days, seven hours and fifty-seven minutes since she had lost him, and she noted sadly that the dull ache inside her was still present.

With a wry little smile, she acknowledged the fact that this headstone probably cost more than her entire house, and losing the boy beneath it had cost her even more. She had visited this exactly spot every day for a long time, and it never got any easier. Her long, floral print skirt swished around her calves, and she tugged the sleeves of her pastel cardigan down over her hands, twisting it mercilessly between her clenched fists. She bit down hard on her lip to prevent the tears from bursting forward from their reservoir inside.

**SEBASTIAN R. VALMONT**

_Adored Son, Beloved Brother_

There were dates on the glossy stone too, of course, but the inscription had always captivated Annette. _Adored son_. Sebastian had never really said much about his parents, but she imagined that they were rather removed from the picture. However, that wasn't the part that really got to her. _Beloved brother_. It made Annette wonder if there were some more Valmonts out wandering the streets, God help New York, because from what she had read about Kathryn, they had a lot to say about each other, but it was far from 'beloved'.

_Kathryn_.

That stupid, evil wench. It was her fault Sebastian was gone, really, it was. And with all of her good deeds, charity work and Church bake sales, Annette had never been more proud of her work than as she watched a tear drip down the porcelain cheek of Kathryn Merteuil as she read the journal that would end her empire.

Annette read the journal many, many times. She practically had it memorized. Reading it the first time broke her heart. No, more accurately, it felt like someone had reached down her throat, yanked out her heart, crushed it with power tools, swept up the gooey pieces, and rubbed them in her face. However, the religious blonde found a strange, sick fascination with it all. It was like a car crash, where if you were watching it, you couldn't look anywhere else, no matter how much you wanted to. Though it killed her, Annette read through Sebastian's words many a time, and slowly, it stopped being so painful. In fact, she began to see the journal as _her_ trophy. This man, so infamous in his ways, had been changed. He had changed for **her**.

Annette took that as reassurance that no matter how many times it states in his handwriting, in his (formerly) private journal that he was in love with Kathryn, that he _really _loved her. It was a very gratifying feeling, but did nothing to alleviate the grief.

At first, she thought that it was some sort of cruel joke. She kept expecting him to jump out at her, and laugh, to laugh like he did that day in the car. She kept expecting to wake up with him beside her. More than once, she had woken up smiling, reaching out to him, only for Sebastian to vanish before her eyes as her hand fell through the air onto a cold spot on her white sheets.

Tears blurring her eyes, the blonde glanced back up at the tombstone. What really killed her were the dates underneath the name. Not that there was anything wrong with having a birthday. But it killed her that Sebastian Valmont was the man she fell in love with, the man she gave her virginity to, and she didn't know his. She couldn't quite face the possibility that maybe she never knew him at all.

Wiping her eyes with the back of her hand, Annette checked the time on her watch. She then realized that she had to leave right then, if she wanted to be on time for the charity function she promised her daddy she would attend.

"Goodnight Sebastian. I'll see you tomorrow," she whispered, forcing herself to walk away.

It is a fascinating coincidence, time. Because if Annette had had more of it, she wouldn't have left so quickly. If she hadn't left in such a rush, maybe she would've heard the click-clack of women's high heels on the pavement. Maybe she would've been inclined to turn around. If she had, she would've seen an exquisitely beautiful brunette with dark sunglasses and a dusky green dress. And maybe she would've seen that the woman wasn't alone. Maybe...

----------------------------------------

"I still don't get what the fuck we're doing here, Valmont," her annoyed voice rang through the now unoccupied cemetery. He smiled fondly at her, but she missed his gaze. Glancing around, Kathryn Merteuil saw that the nearest person was an elderly gentleman leaning over a grave, placing a single rose on a tombstone, crying softly in the distance. Had she been the sentimental type, she would've been touched by this display of love, unchanged by death. Too bad she wasn't, and so the only thing currently touching her was the hand of Sebastian Valmont. He had helped her out of the car, and had been very reluctant to let go of her since. Kathryn kept up her usual cool façade, but inside, she had no idea what she would do if she had to let go of him again.

"I don't know. It is my grave. I thought it might hold some sentimental value to you," he deadpanned, a small smirk curving the edges of his pouty lips. Unconsciously, her expression changed to a similar one.

"Well, seeing as you aren't buried here, I think all ties I have to the place are null and void," Kathryn said, turning to walk away, tugging Sebastian behind her. He barely moved.

"_Beloved_ brother…" he mused, and she stopped in her tracks, waiting for that inevitable question. The question she thought she'd never have to answer. Not to him. Not ever. Fifteen or so month's worth of unimaginable pain began to gather inside of her until the pressure of the memories threatened to force their way out through her tear ducts. Kathryn had never liked to cry. It was a sign of weakness, a vulnerability. She wasn't particularly interested in being vulnerable, not even in front of Sebastian.

"What about it?" she jumped the gun, stealing the thunder he was packing in the question that was to come. He glared slightly. Valmont was always a drama queen.

"Interesting choice of words," Sebastian stated lightly.

"Well, it was either that or 'Exceedingly Hormonal, Arrogant Teen Who Boned Half of New York, May He Rest In Peace. While the second one was more fitting, it was also more expensive. You know how it is," Kathryn said dryly.

Sebastian gave a little half-smile in response. Kathryn knew better. She could read the disappointment in his eyes. Her heart went out to him, but her pride stood in the way of her saying anything that may have actually been consoling. Instead, she offered this.

"Love is for weak people, Sebastian. We've always said that."

His head shot up from where it had been looking down, examining his shoes. "Of course. I know. I just thought, maybe—you know, never mind. I was just wondering."

Minutes crawled by in silence, Kathryn unconsciously gripping the hand of her 'beloved' stepbrother as she examined the grave that was supposedly his. She hadn't really had the opportunity to visit, being locked away in the Methadone Clinic, courtesy of the pesky Seventeen magazine virgin. As her thoughts stumbled across Annette, Kathryn's eyes widened as determination shot through her veins. The manipulative beauty had forgotten about her plan, in light of current family issues (namely, her stepbrother coming back from the dead), but now that she remembered…

But Kathryn knew that there was something she had to say to Sebastian before she could do anything else. Something that would elicit a true smile from him, that would hopefully reach him, let him know deep down that she _did_ care, without her actually having to lower herself to expressing it. She squeezed his fingers to get his attention. His intense blue gaze locked onto her, and she felt nostalgic of all the times where she had commanded his complete and totally attention. Thousands of parties came to mind, especially her delicious victory over her cousin Cassidy. Just thinking about it brought a smile to the young woman's face. Embarrassing as it would be to admit it, should her stepbrother be interested in someone else, it wasn't only Kathryn's eyes that were green.

"You're not a toy, Sebastian."

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_Author's Notes_

_Hey guys! Thank you for your completely awesome comments on last chapter. They really mean a lot to me. As for why I'm updating **again**, this story has currently hijacked my train of thought lol, so I figured I might as well run with it for now. Also, hate to say it, but I'm becoming a comment whore. I just **love** them. Hahaha. _

_I just realized that I didn't actually tell you guys when this story was set. Some of you probably figured it out, but I thought I'd just let you know for sure:_

_The events of Cruel Intentions **did** happen. This is one and a half years after that. _

_The events of Cruel Intentions 3 did **not** happen yet. They all do go to the school, as sophomores, but Cassidy hasn't really met Patrick, and Patrick and Jason haven't started their games…yet. _

_Anyway, so thanks for reading, and please review!_

_Xo Sam _


	4. Truth, Bitter Truth

**Breaking the Broken**

_Four_

Truth, Bitter Truth

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_And I show you my sins; show me all your scars_

_As we settle in, it's written in the stars_

_Your watery eyes got me, send me floating_

_And my weak heart is swimming with devotion_

Barry Kristen – '_Ordinary Life'_

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_Why is this bedroom so cold?_

_Turn away on your side_

_Is my timing that flawed?_

_Our respect runs so dry_

_Yet there's still this appeal_

_That we've kept all our lives_

……

_You cry out in your sleep_

_All my feelings exposed_

_And there's a taste in my mouth_

_As desperation takes hold_

Fall Out Boy – '_Love Will Tear Us Apart'_

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The water had been running for a very long time, and apparently it was very hot. That was all Sebastian could really tell, judging by the steam wafting from underneath the bathroom door, heating the entire hotel room. Sighing and loosening his tie, he wondered how much longer he was going to have to wait for human interaction. After leaving his supposed 'place of rest', Kathryn had insisted he drive out to some random location. She hadn't told him where they were going, only where to go. He normally would've refused, or at least demanded an explanation, but he knew he owed her. In fact, Sebastian Valmont had a feeling that he'd be paying off this debt to his stepsister for a while to come.

That's how Sebastian found himself in a five-star luxury hotel, far from home. The fact that the suite had only one large, comfy king sized bed was sheer luck. The fact that Kathryn had been in the bathroom for an eternity was a different story entirely. The first thing she did when they arrived was drop her bags and announce that she was going to take a shower.

"It's been far too long since I've had a good shower," she stated firmly, and rejected his request for company with a tiny smile. Her words arrived at his ears with a pang of guilt at his heart, and the look in her eyes told him that that was completely intentional. Whether they discussed it or not, it was essentially Sebastian's fault that Kathryn had spent all that time in the clinic. He could argue many different ways, but it all came down to it being his words that landed her in so much trouble.

Guilt was not something that Sebastian was familiar with. Or any Valmont, for that matter. He came from a long line of men who did what they pleased and screwed who they liked, fuck the consequences. Some might consider them psychopaths, and honestly Sebastian himself didn't think the description was far off. However, the gorgeous blonde male seemed to be breaking out of the mold, because upon seeing Kathryn again and hearing tidbits about her life in rehab awakened feelings in him that he didn't quite recognize. Writing them off as guilt, he let his head fall back against the headboard and let his eyes fall closed.

Annette was a bet. Honestly, completely, truly. Sure, she had been amusing to him for some time, but he found Blaine amusing too, and that didn't mean he was in love with him. He found her fascinating, as he found most girls who refused to fall into his bed right away. There weren't many of them, so he had plenty of time to really get under their skin and make them believe whatever phony declarations of feelings he made. For a virgin, Annette was pretty easy. He smirked at the memory. They had known each other two weeks, maybe. Most things he knew about her came from her _Seventeen_ article, and were quite frankly boring. Sebastian had thought that her honest, upfront, caring attitude would be a welcome change. He was disappointed. He realized, with a sick feeling in his stomach, that he had grown so accustomed to Kathryn's special brand of mind games that he had actually grown to _like_ them, and without them, he was just uninterested. Damn.

The reason Annette had his prized possession in the first place all led back to Kathryn herself. After her spectacular display of her 'feelings' towards him in her infamous toy speech, he had left the room in a fit of rage. He had known full well that it was just an act of hers, designed to keep him at arm's length, but he was too riled up to care. **_She_** had turned this into a game, a contest, and it was time for him to one up her. In order to do that, Sebastian needed to win Annette back, and he would do it at all costs, just to spite his wicked stepsister. He knew he needed something big, something romantic. He needed to make his blonde conquest feel that she was so much more.

Giving her his journal had seemed brilliant at the time.

Of course, everything changed when Kathryn sent Ronald after him. They struggled for a while in the street. Actually, this struggle was more Ronald throwing punch after punch while he defended himself. Usually, Sebastian never let anyone be the more aggressive person in any situation, but it's a bit of a different situation when you deflowered the other person's girlfriend. Whoops.

Eventually, he couldn't let him take out his rage on him anymore. He had quite a bit of his own. So Sebastian swung back. And just when Sebastian thought that day couldn't get any worse, Annette appeared. For a split second, Sebastian was elated to see her, surprising even himself. However, that feeling vanished with the feeling of Ronald's fist to his jaw. Turning his attention back to the fight, he noticed only vaguely when Annette tried to interfere, flying into the middle of the road as a result.

Sebastian could pinpoint this as a moment that would change his life. Hesitating only slightly, he launched himself into harm's way, forcing Annette out of the oncoming taxi's path. He had no idea why she couldn't have just gotten the fuck up on her own and needed him, the bruised, battered and dazed one to save her, but it wasn't really a time for questions. All he knew was that she was too good, too pure to die at the hands of a fight she had no part in, a situation where she didn't belong, because of a boy she never should've gotten involved with. These thoughts were flying through his head as the yellow taxi hit him instead. But as he flew over the windshield, as he hit the road on the other side, suddenly his mind was filled with a very different image. One of a petite, tiny brunette with shocking green eyes and porcelain skin. Her as she smiled, as she scowled, as she smirked at him as she so often did.

Only dimly had he registered the two people that were actually at his side. Annette and Ronald were both knelt over him, the previous fight forgotten. Annette was pleading with him to just hold on, as Ronald reassured them that an ambulance was on the way. Sebastian was sure that this was the end.

"I love you," he had whispered. Annette had reciprocated. But the words he had struggled to get out weren't meant for her, but for a girl who had no chance to hear them.

As he lost consciousness, his last thought was of the brunette holding a champagne glass, her eyes full of ice. Her words echoed in his mind, and it would be these that he would remember when he woke up.

"Silly rabbit. My triumph isn't over her. It's over you."

Sebastian Valmont had always had a rather warped sense of humor. That was probably why he took so much pleasure in destroying insipid debutantes. It was also probably why he thought it would be really amusing to fake his death.

Groggily, his bright blue eyes opened. They were heavy with exhaustion and dim with confusion. The first thing he felt was an incredible amount of pain when he tried to move. He heard the beeping of about a thousand different machines in the background, but the voices in his head were more prominent as he tried to remember what had happened to him.

_"I know how to alleviate menstrual cramps, thank you very much."_

_"She's daddy's little angel… a paradigm of chastity and virtue."_

_"You can put it **anywhere**."_

_"Happy hunting, Sebastian!"_

_"I wouldn't expect of man of your experience to respect my beliefs." _

_"Are you a lesbian? I didn't mean to offend you, I just picked up on a little bit of that lesbian vibe…"_

_"Because I'm the only person you can't have, and it kills you." _

_"I just think people shouldn't experience the act of love until they are in love."_

_"It's not about winning, Sebastian."_

_"Eat me, Sebastian. It's okay for guys like you and Court to fuck everybody but when I do it, I get dumped for innocent little twits like Cecile."_

_"This sure doesn't taste like iced tea…"_

_"It's okay you can laugh. I promise I won't tell anybody."_

_"You could be a model. It's too bad you're not sexy."_

_"Unfortunately, our Don Juan is moving with the speed of a Special Olympics hurdler."_

_"That's no way to go through life."_

_"Because I don't trust myself with you."_

_"She also told me that you fucked Cecile."_

_"I didn't know it was Asshole Day at the Valmont house!"_

_"In English, I'll fuck your brains out."_

_"E-mail is for geeks and pedophiles. Be romantic. Write her another letter."_

_"You're just a toy, Sebastian."_

_"I am lightened, can we drop this?"_

_"Why are you guys helping me?" _

_"This is what I like to call "quiet time". It's where we sit and reflect on the things we've just done."_

_"I hate it when things don't go my way. It makes me so horny."_

_"Cecile? …Stop crying…"_

_"My, what an adorable shirt you're wearing."_

_"God, are you a chump!"_

_"What shall we toast to?"_

_"Silly rabbit. My triumph isn't over her. It's over you."_

_"I love you too." _

The memories swirled around in his mind. Flashes of color, and light and sound filled his head until they all became crystal clear. Now fully conscious, Sebastian groaned at the memories of this last summer. It had certainly been interesting, but judging by the amount of IVs poking into his muscular arm, it had hardly been worth it. Now, not only did he not have his journal, he was also in the midst of a war with Kathryn, and had a clingy girlfriend who was under the illusion that he was in love with her.

Sebastian was shocked at the sudden appearance of a doctor at his side. It seemed that he was conjured out of thin air. The man in the white coat began to babble on and on about how his waking up was such a miracle when Sebastian started to tune him out. That's when Valmont got his brilliant idea. What a way to one-up Kathryn, than to pretend to have not made it through. What a way to see if he _really_ meant nothing to her. Surprised by his own genius, Sebastian instantly voiced his desire to be claimed deceased to the doctor, who was more than a little shocked and a lot more than a little hesitant. However, that incident only proved what Sebastian had always known: money can buy you anyone.

It was supposed to be a joke! Sebastian was supposed to be declared dead, but then show up later that week in Kathryn's room. Surprise! However, he had forgotten one key thing, and that was that he didn't have his journal.

His trick might've been a little amusing too, if it weren't for his revenge-hungry, Bible-thumping blonde girlfriend. The moment his friends and family had received the "bad news", Annette had flown out the door, to the nearest Kinko's, apparently. Not even a day later, his precious journal had been passed around the school like it was a fucking yearbook! And of course, it didn't stop there. It was all over the papers, in the news, and Kathryn Merteuil was officially destroyed.

Ha. Ha.

But once a copy of the journal reached him, Sebastian was shocked to realize that a few pages were missing. If he wasn't surprised enough that the 'good' and 'pure' and 'kind' Annette had done something this malicious, it certainly stunned him that she would tamper with his words. And which pages were missing? All the pages on his former conquests, Cecile, Kathryn, and the bet were there. However, significantly absent were the pages describing Annette's first time.

'_That sneaky little bitch_,' was Sebastian's first thought. That was before the reality crashed down that due to Annette and her handiwork. This prank had spun way out of proportion. He would not be able to go home. He would **_not_** be able to show up at Kathryn's. They lived together, they worked together, and now, he supposed, they went down together, because neither of them could show their faces in Manhattan society at the moment.

So he did the only thing that made sense. He left. He traveled the world and he sampled the countries, only to find that something inside of him just felt empty. No matter where he went or what (and who) he did, he was just **_bored_**. And that's when he came to his first, horrific realization that he missed Kathryn. Sebastian had never been one to deny himself anything, so when he heard that Kathryn was being released from the rehabilitation clinic she had been condemned to, he just had to see her. Upon laying eyes on the petite young woman, he realized that that empty place didn't feel quite so empty anymore.

"Yoo hoo? Anybody home in there, Valmont?" a mocking voice called through the large room. He opened his eyes and drank in the site of her. Kathryn, smirking, was perched on the edge of the bed in a champagne-colored negligee that emphasized some of her better features (in Sebastian's opinion, anyway). Good to know that some things will never change.

"Jesus. Your eyes have been closed like that for half an hour. I thought you _died_," she snapped, but her eyes widened as she reconsidered her words. There was a little fear in her eyes, and she hoped that he couldn't see it, and yet she knew he could. He always could. "I meant—"

"No matter," he waved his hand, waving away the statement and all of its implications. "Did you need something?"

"Yes. For you to get off my bed," she stated simply, a challenge in her eyes. She knew good and well that he wouldn't, and deep down, she didn't even _want _him too. But it was just typical of their behavior to challenge each other, even over the smallest of things. You can't mess with tradition.

"Why Kat, there's plenty of room here for both of us," suggested Sebastian with false cheer, patting the spot next to him. His tone reminded them both of Annette, and the atmosphere was instantly heavier. To his surprise, Kathryn crawled across the bed, but didn't stop until she was on top of him. She laid atop him, invoking memories of when she had been _persuading_ him to speedup Cecile's "sexual awakening". The mere memory made him hard, and the brunette noticed.

"Mmmm… feels like somebody missed me," she purred, writhing about. He didn't respond, but placed his hands on her hips, caressing her gently. Her eyes locked with his over her shoulder. A few charged moments passed, before she rolled over. Both groaned at the friction, and they were now forehead to forehead. Sebastian noticed the look in Kathryn's eyes that told him she had something serious on her mind, and instantly sobered.

"Tell me everything," she whispered, her eyes darkening. And so he did. The whole sordid tale of everything that had unfolded in the time after he slammed her bedroom door. Kathryn gave little to no reaction during his story, and he could see her bright eyes turn to ice. Once he was done, she merely rolled off him, shut off the light and curled up into a ball on the other side of the large bed.

"Kat?" he called in a sing-song voice.

"My name is Kathryn," came her muffled reply.

"I know. But I happen to enjoy nicknaming, and I really enjoy the fact that I'm the only one that can get away with it with you."

"Or so you think."

"What's _that_ supposed to mean?"

"You think you're special Sebastian. You aren't. Not to me," she said, still looking firmly the other way. Her bony back was to him, and he marveled that someone treated for bulimia (among other things…) could be so skinny. He wasn't going to pretend that her words didn't strike a nerve, but he now knew better than to believe her.

"Now, now, Kat. Let's not do this again. We both know where your phony sentiments of unfeeling got us last time."

"I can't believe you didn't come back for me," she whispered into the darkness, but he heard her anyway.

"Oh, come on, Kathryn! What was I supposed to do? I was "dead", I couldn't just stroll up and tell them to let you go!" he exclaimed, exasperated.

"You were supposed to send me some message! Some kind of sign! Something to make me feel less horrible, and hateful, and alone!" she burst, and Sebastian saw something rare indeed—the ice in her eyes had begun to melt into liquid, trembling on the lid of her eye.

This was a conversation of the night. Full of secrets, of confessions, of emotions too vulnerable for daylight. After, they were silent for a very long time. Sebastian didn't even think it was possible for Kathryn to keep her mouth shut for this long. That's when he began to hear a quiet sniffling from her side of the bed. Lifting up only his head, Valmont checked the time. The digital clock on the nightstand registered 3:40 A.M., the numbers casting a faint red glow into the darkness.

"Sebastian… no, Sebastian, please, I'm sorry…" a voice whispered hoarsely, thick with tears. He actually looked around, expecting to see another person in the room, because that definitely wasn't something Kathryn would say. Not his Kathryn. However, the voice was indeed coming from his stepsister.

"Umm… it's fine Kathryn," he said awkwardly, but she didn't seem to hear him. Every once in a while, her quiet pleas would become hysterical, and nothing he could say to her would calm her down. That's when he realized the blatant truth—Kathryn was _sleeping_.

"Kathryn… Kat… Kathryn… wake up, baby," he shook her gently by the shoulders until she stirred. Her moist green eyes opened wide and disbelieving.

"Sebastian!" she awed.

"Uh huh. Kathryn, I'm here. Everything's fine, it was just a dream. Okay?" But the brunette had been plagued by these nightmares for far too long for anything he would say to change that. He may be with her during the day, but at night, in her dreams, she was alone, him being torn from her again, and again, and again, with each passing night. Just like the last year and a half.

After forty-five minutes of whispering sweet nothings and consolations, he realized that there was nothing he could say or do to let her sleep. He contented himself to just hold her. Wrapping his toned arms around her tiny waist, he drew her close to him. She curled instinctively into him, and fell back into her sleep. He noted with satisfaction that it was a much more restful rest than the one she had just been having. That, and that their bodies fit together perfectly, just like he had always known they would.

Sebastian Valmont didn't sleep much that night. He reflected on his life, the past, and what had led them to where they were then. He kept watch over his wicked stepsister. Twisted, manipulative and downright evil during the day, she had always looked so much more innocent during her dreams. Kathryn Merteuil. How he adored her.

-------------------------------------------

_Author's Note_

_The italicized quotes taken from the movie were the memories floating through Sebastian's mind, post-wake up. Just wanted to clarify lol. _

_Hey everybody. Thank you **so much **for all of your reviews. Seriously, it would be embarrassing to tell you how happy they make me. I'm not sure how this chapter came out. It may have been a little… sucky. Lol. But I tried to put in a lot of back-story, and establish a little more of the relationship between K/S, so hopefully you all didn't hate it too much. Please review, and thanks for reading!_

_Xo Sam_


	5. An Unholy Alliance

**Breaking the Broken**

_Five_

An Unholy Alliance

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_So call off the quarantine, _

_You can't save the rest from me. _

_Clean this with kerosene, _

_If you can't leave it be, might as well make it bleed. _

Dashboard Confessional

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Whoever thought up the idea of "roommates" obviously never lived in a dorm. That was the major thought running through Jason's head as he unpacked his stuff. But seriously, who thought that the concept of taking strangers and sticking them together in small living quarters was a good one? Hanging up a button-down shirt in the too-small closet, he cast a forlorn gaze at the two single beds in the dingy room and tried to tune out the sound of his roommate. Patrick Bale. Of all the guys in the world, he had to be stuck with the one who was probably the biggest loser.

Since arriving, Patrick had kept up a steady stream of babbling. Actually, it was more of an interrupted stream, consisting of talk-hacking cough-talk. Jason had been ignoring most of it, and setting himself up for what promised to be another interesting year at Prestridge. After all, how could it be dull when there was Cassidy Merteuil on the scene?

The mere mention of her name caused Jason Argyle to break out into a fond smile. That cruel, calculating, gorgeous bitch. To a degree, he had been in love with her ever since he laid eyes on her at Freshman Orientation. They quickly became friends. Kind of. Sort of. It was more a relationship of understanding than one of friendship and feeling. He was the only person that knew the real Cassidy.

Or so he thought.

Everyone knew _of _the Merteuils. They were, after all, one of the most influential families in the world. They were particularly famous for their women. They made for the perfect trophy wives. They were always beautiful, confident, intelligent and innocent. Unless the murmurings were true…

So when Jason Argyle came face to face with Cassidy Merteuil, he was in for quite a surprise. The true her was far from the docile, obedient, well-mannered image she put forth. Admitted, he only saw this side of her after catching her in the act.

OCCUPIED! _The sign's brilliant green letters shown against the darkness of the deserted hallway. He had been quietly creeping his way back to his dorm room after some late-night escapades with a few drunk co-eds. He licked his lips at the memory. But suddenly, Jason found himself standing outside the dark room, wondering why somebody would be developing their photos at three in the morning. Flinging the door open, he was created with a loud clamoring noise and a shrill scream._

_"Asshole! What the fuck are you doing!" _

_Jason looked up in surprise at the vaguely familiar voice and saw a head of glossy brown curls and blazing brown eyes. In those eyes, he saw not only anger, but a trace of fear. Sure, he knew of Cassidy. Every guy on campus had. But he had always heard that she was so nice, so sweet, so… not cursing people off for opening doors. _

_You can't always believe what you read._

_Turning his attention downward, he stopping staring in awe at the brunette in front of him and looked at exactly what she had dropped. Scattered across the hardwood floor were pictures. Not that that was surprising in the least, seeing as it was the university dark room. But the subject matter was enough to raise even Jason's eyebrows. _

_"Is this Professor Armstrong?" he asked, disbelieving._

_Her arms were crossed over her chest, and he admired the defiant tilt of her chin. "Yes."_

_"And that's Violet Taylor?" he asked slowly, still unable to quite grasp the situation._

_"Yes," she snapped impatiently._

_"And she's giving him—"_

_"Yes," Cassidy said, with a cruel and satisfied smirk twisting her pink lips. _

_"This is wrong on so many levels…"_

_"I know. You know. And I'm betting that Professor Armstrong knows that too."_

_"So what is this, like blackmail?"_

_"Ooh, somebody catches on quickly," she mocked, bending over to pick up the pictures and strategically giving him a good look at her ass. Seeing that he was distracted, she took the opportunity to grab the photograph out of his hand. _

_"Now look Jason. You aren't going to tell anybody what you saw here," she started slowly, as if speaking to a daft person._

_"No? And why not?" he countered with a smirk, leaning against the doorframe._

_"There are a whole lot of reasons why not. The top two would be that you have no proof and nobody would believe you. I'm the goddess that you all worship here at Prestridge. You're currently the man whore, right? Yeah, you look really credible next to me. Can't wait for a 'your word against mine' match up." _

_"Touché." _

_"Merci," she drawled, a slight smile curving her lips now. She extends her hand, which he kissed. "See ya 'round, Jason," she giggled, walking past him, a renewed bounce in her step and photos clutched tightly in hand. Yet as she walked past, he heard her mumble something under her breath. Words that would stay with him, occupying his thoughts that night. Words that he just heard, almost lost among sounds of the night, and cut off abruptly with the swinging closed of the heavy door, leaving him in absolute darkness._

_"And they said Valmont lead with his zipper…"_

Valmont… Valmont… the name had sounded so familiar, and he had no idea why. So the next night, after another interesting run-in with Cassidy, he had gone to an Internet search engine and typed in the name, not fully aware of how creepy that was.

He had gotten more results than he could have ever dreamed. Everything from Fortune 500 company owners to homemakers to lawyers and judges, it seemed that there was a Valmont in every field, with only one thing in common. They were the best at what they did. There were also interesting patterns in the family. The men all lacked fidelity, and the women all looked the other way. More interesting, in Jason's opinion, was when teenage girls' weblog entries starting popping up. He had thought that the older Valmont men had gotten around, but apparently Sebastian had a track record to be reckoned with.

Looking for more information on this mysterious Sebastian, he discovered an article containing a picture. A young blonde man with an almost too pretty face and deep blue eyes stared back at him. On his arm was a petite brunette with electrifying green eyes and flawless porcelain skin. They were wearing matching smiles and had equally intense gazes. He was instantly enamored with the girl. Jason froze in shock when he read the caption.

**Stepsiblings Sebastian Valmont and Kathryn Merteuil**

**celebrate at the 70th birthday of**

**Isabelle Merteuil.**

_Merteuil_?

This was when Jason first began to realize that everything in high society was a web. A large, tangled, nasty, complicated web that once you were in, there was no escaping. However, he got his most intriguing glimpse into the life of Sebastian Valmont when he saw an entry for eBay on the search engine.

"'Cruel Intentions', the Journal of Sebastian Valmont'," he had murmured aloud. Clicking impulsively on the link, he found that the Don Juan had tragically died in a car accident under some very intriguing circumstances. After receiving news of his death, his girlfriend at the time had run off and published his infamous journal. Reading on in the summary, the writer had snidely hinted that his words were responsible for the ruination of the Merteuil reputation in New York. Now he **_had_** to read it.

When he read the summary, he had thought that Cassidy had probably seduced and humiliated Valmont as revenge on behalf of her cousin Kathryn. However, he noted with wide-eyed fascination that that was definitely not the case. He had never been so envious of a dead man.

Cassidy had started talking to him more after the Dark Room Incident. Slowly, they had become friends, forming a deep bond of mutual respect and distrust. At first he hadn't understood this development at all, but after reading 'Cruel Intentions', his perspective changed. He had thought Cassidy to be a master manipulator, but saw that she was a cheap imitation of Kathryn. He had thought himself quite the ladies man, but saw that he was nothing in comparison to Sebastian. But he saw through the words of Valmont himself that even deceitful and cold people like themselves need someone to be real with. He was that for Cassidy, as Sebastian was for Kathryn. However, he was deeply disturbed by one thing. Through Valmont's writings, he could tell that it went without saying that Sebastian was in love with Kathryn. Yet through the journal, Jason found himself completely engrossed in Sebastian's life, feeling the same things as the deceased writer. He wondered if that inadvertently made him in love with Kathryn.

Suddenly, he heard his friend's name, and thought he must've imagined it. But then he saw Patrick Bale giving him a triumphant look, and knew that it wasn't only in his mind.

"So, are you in or are you out?" his nerdy roommate had asked, and Jason's mind flew inadvertently to Kathryn Merteuil demanding the same of her stepbrother.

"Have you read 'Cruel Intentions'?" Jason asked, going on a hunch. Instead of the confused look he had half-expected to be greeted with, Patrick let out a smooth smile.

"It's my Bible."

The new roommates exchanged a glance that said that there was clearly a lot they didn't know about each other.

"So? The bet?"

"What bet?"

"It's sort of a square bet. It really works out for everybody. I get Cassidy, you get to see her taken down a peg or two, she gets a reality check, and nobody loses any money in the process…" Patrick begun.

Grinning, Jason realized that he and his new roommate had a lot more in common than he first thought. And that they could have a hell of a lot of fun this year…

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_Humm... what do you guys think? I don't know, that might've turned out really sucky, but I tried. It was some necessary back story, I thought. I don't know, I'm currently trying to kick an evil writer's block, and writing and reviews always help that lol. So… thanks for reading, and please let me know what you thought._

_Xo Sam_


	6. Family Resemblence

**Breaking the Broken**

_Six_

Family Resemblance

**------------------------**

_All of the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening._

Alexander Woollcott

**------------------------**

_And I wonder how it started_

_How we became so cold hearted_

Cassie Steele "_Empty Eyes"_

**------------------------**

"Not that I don't enjoy all this constant togetherness, but what the fuck are we doing Kathryn?" his impatient voice filled the limo. Smiling condescendingly at her stepbrother, Kathryn Merteuil kept her bright green eyes glued to the tinted windows of the limo. It was climbing steadily up the mountain, winding road after winding road, just as it had been for the better part of two hours.

"_Kaaaaaaaaaaat,_" Sebastian whined, evoking thoughts of a six-year-old being dragged on holiday with his parents.

"Be quiet. We'll be there soon!" Kathryn snapped.

"How soon?" he inquired.

She said nothing but shot him a look saying '_You **can't** be serious_', and turned her attention back to the window. Carefully examining the scenery, she noted with a small smile that not much had change since she had last been here.

"Are we there yet?"

With an exasperated sigh, Kathryn lifted herself up and moved to the other side of the limo. The sprawling grassy knolls, clear blue lakes, and abundance of trees and flowers made painted a beautiful picture. However, it's not one that you would expect a girl like Kathryn to appreciate. At first, she didn't. Then, under the careful guidance of one much older and more experienced than she, Kathryn realized that this was just the place to clear your head, relax, then plot some more. Since then, she had made regular pilgrimages to Mount Marvel and the sprawling estate that sat atop it.

"How about now?" Sebastian persisted. Snapping her eyes from the window to his, she saw that the annoyance in his voice hadn't seeped into his handsome face. He sat there, staring at her, wearing a joyful smile at finally getting through to her. Sebastian Valmont was a man easily bored. He moved from girl to girl as he did from place to place, from book to book, from thought to thought. Some might diagnose that as A.D.H.D. Fortunately, Sebastian, like many other trust fund children in his place, had no need to focus… or think at all, when it came down to it.

"Sebastian…"

"Yes, Kat?"

"If you say one more word, I think I may have to castrate you with a manicure scissor."

"Don't be ridiculous Kathryn, you don't even have a—" he stopped short in his sentence as the light glinted sinisterly off a tiny pair of shears poking out from a large Gucci bag on the floor. With a defeated sigh, Sebastian said. "Can you at least tell me where we're going?"

"Certainly. Tromperie Manor."

His sandy eyebrows furrowed, but Kathryn didn't feel like answering anything else. Holding up a perfectly manicured hand, she halted all further questioning. Casting her a disgruntled look from his piercing blue eyes, Sebastian sat back in his seat. Kathryn looked back out the window, beginning to feel herself recharge as they got closer and closer to her favorite place in the world.

**------------------------**

Guarded carefully behind miles and miles of natural barriers, twisting black iron gates, and thick stone walls, a woman cackled maniacally. Casting aside her copy of _Cruel Intentions_, she got up out of her bed, exhibiting unnatural spryness for a woman of her age. Over seventy years had done nothing to her agility, and little to her beauty. Looking into a mirror was always a pleasant experience, as she was greeted with the same flawless complexion and porcelain skin that she had passed on to the girls who came after her.

Tossing an irritated glance at the man still in her bed, she wondered what he was doing. He certainly didn't expect to be invited to stay, did he?

"Martin, darling…" she began carefully. "Whatever are you doing?"

"Well, I was—"

"Yes, I'm sure you were. And I must say, I do regret deeply, but you have to leave right now. I have other obligations this afternoon."

"But I---"

"**Now**," the woman commanded; the look of false warmth in her eyes now extinguished, leaving nothing but cold, green hardness in its place. Her tone was polite but frosty, and if they weren't located on a hill, Martin would be heading for one right about now.

"As you wish."

Smiling satisfactorily, she crossed the large master bedroom and swung shut the door to her massive closet without so much as a backwards glance. Browsing intently through rack after rack of clothing, she finally selected something to wear. Looking in the mirror while applying makeup, she stared at her shocking green eyes, porcelain complexion and dainty features only slightly lined with age, and wondered how on earth she was a grandmother.

Not that she wasn't proud of her grandchildren. On the contrary, they were her pride and joy, while she considered her own children miserable failures. Bustling about her bedchamber, she reflected upon her family and its dynasty, as she did most mornings. If she left nothing behind, at least there was the Merteuil legacy. The one constant kink in this plan would be some of her thoroughly useless female family members. They had yet to learn that no man was truly worthy of them, and instead played the vapid trophy wife to their impotent husbands.

Her eyes fell upon a picture of Kathryn. Not the youngest, not the oldest, but her favorite by far. The young Merteuil had all the features of her grandmother, along with her elegance, intelligent and cunning. Her only pitfall would be her unfortunate 'outing' in New York. But that was ancient history by now, and as all grandmothers do, Isabelle overlooked that minor detail.

Chuckling at the booklet lying innocently on her bedside table, Isabelle pondered the damage done to her family's reputation by it. Normally, she would be out for the blood of anyone who dared to speak a word against her family, but it was different with Sebastian. It always was. Honestly, if her moronic gold-digger of a daughter hadn't married Edward Valmont, she would've considered arranged a marriage for Kathryn. Old-fashioned as that was, nobody dared go against Isabelle. Then she had been pleased to have him in the family whatever way she could get him.

Isabelle always prided herself on being an excellent judge of character. She could spot a fake among the genuine with her eyes closed. After all, nobody could put on a show like a Merteuil woman. She could tell that the young Valmont was something special the moment she laid eyes on him. And she wasn't blind like the rest. Isabelle could tell immediately that there was something special between her prized granddaughter and her stepbrother.

Strutting purposefully down the hall, she stopped and softened when she passed a family portrait. Green eyes gazed upon rows of beautiful women, attractive husbands and perfect children, finally coming to rest on the one she watched almost as carefully. Cassidy.

Dear, sweet Cassidy. The child was a firecracker, she would give her that. She was vicious in an endearing sort of way, to her grandmother at least. She had always lacked the trait that made Isabelle and Kathryn so successful though, whatever that was. It was as if there was a secret ingredient that she was so close to obtaining, but it slipped away at the final moment. Isabelle was very proud of her accomplishments thus far, wrecking all sorts of havoc and raising all sorts of hell, and to her credit, she hadn't been caught yet.

As these thoughts swirled among her, a freshly waxed limousine continued its slow crawl up the winding roads leading to the giant, intimidating wrought iron gates that would lead them to Tromperie Manor, and the woman farther up on the long line of black widows.

**------------------------**

"This is nice. Is this what you wanted to show me? Because I've seen huge, creepy mansions before. I've lived in a few of them, actually. Can we go now?"

Sebastian knew good and well that Kathryn had a reason for bringing them up there, and it was probably a very good one. However, halfway through their journey, he discovered that his constant commentary was irritating her. It made the tiny vein in her temple tick. And there were few things that Valmont liked so much as to torture his stepsister. Nevertheless, Kathryn seemed to be getting wise to his game and only smiled at him before raising her tiny hand to the large brass knocker.

"Chester," Kathryn greeted the man with a curt nod. The butler rushed past them promptly, popping open the trunk to their limousine.

Raising his eyebrows slightly, but with mirth in his expressive eyes and laughter coating his throat, Sebastian asked, "Does he sit and roll over too?"

"I'm sure he does, but he doesn't play dead nearly as well as you do," Kathryn spat bitingly, and Sebastian's face fell.

"We're back to this again…"

"Yes, we're back to _this _again, Sebastian! You—"

"Kathryn, darling!" a delighted cry rang through the domed foyer of the massive manor.

"Grandma!" Kathryn squealed, and Sebastian was surprised in spite of himself at how joyful she looked.

The older woman and her mirror image embraced at the bottom of the curving marble staircase, and Valmont, leaning against the doorframe, watched with a sort of detached fascination. It wasn't often that Kathryn showed genuine emotion, but Isabelle had always been able to invoke it.

Turning her green gaze from her beloved granddaughter to the young girl's companion, she drank in the sight of a smirking Sebastian Valmont.

"You're not dead," Isabelle drawled with a delighted smile.

"You either. I wonder who'll get there first," he quipped, approaching. Kathryn looked scandalized, but Isabelle just laughed.

"I see you still have your sense of humor, Mr. Valmont."

"And I see you've remained your marvelous looks. It's nice to see you again, 'Belle," Sebastian said, kissing her hand.

"I knew you were too much of a smug bastard to die," the older woman admitted, and everyone in the room laughed.

Taking the older woman's arm, Kathryn began to lead Isabelle up the stairs. "Come, grandmother, we've got scheming to do!"

Both cackled as they made their way up the stairs, catching up on everything. Sebastian watched from his place at the bottom of the steps, amused by this sudden surge of affection from the two usually distant women. About to follow Chester up to his room, he passed a man speeding down the steps. Scanning him briefly, taking in his disheveled clothing and indignant expression, Sebastian registered with a chuckle what must've happened, and patted the man on the back good-naturedly before continuing his jog up the stairs.

"Tough break, man."

**------------------------**

_Humm… I'm not sure how that turned out, but I promised an update, and I've hit a very random writer's block, so I tried. Believe me, this seems like filler but it has a purpose. Lol. So please review and let me know what you think. Thanks for reading! _

_Sam_


	7. The Edge of Something New

**Breaking the Broken**

_Seven_

The Edge of Something New

----------------

…_he knew the lie of silence to be as evil as the lie of speech._

Gilbert Parker, _The Battle of the Strong_

----------------

"How are you, grandmother?" her voice droned through the airwaves, the noticeable upper-class lilt to it causing Isabelle to roll her eyes. A fine display of yet another Merteuil family trait—hypocrisy. She scorned her family for being pretentious when the matriarch herself was the exact same way.

"I'm fine Cassidy, how are you dear?" she responded expectedly. If these words were written, they would sound like a typical, familial conversation. However, anyone listening would hear the icy, cordial tone that was to be expected from a Merteuil woman. Age had done nothing to dull Isabelle, and she could read Cassidy like a book. There was something she wanted, and it wasn't to exchange pleasantries with her favorite grandmother. A tense standoff took place, Cassidy cracking after five minutes."Have you heard from Kathryn lately?" she inquired innocently. _Please_. Cassidy Merteuil hadn't been innocent in a long time, a fact that Isabelle boasted upon privately. She should've known that this was about Kathryn. It always was. From an early age, tiny Kathryn Merteuil had made it obvious that she was someone to look out for. A long standing rivalry between the cousins made it a wise move on Cassidy's part to be doing just that.

"Kathryn?" Isabelle cooed, silently padding down the long hallway of the third floor. Tromperie Manor had quite a bit of room. Quite a bit was actually an understatement for the majestic home of the head of the Merteuil family, consisting of sprawling grounds and a fifteen bedroom stone mansion shrouded in secrecy and shrubbery. Considering all the rooms in the house fit for royalty, it was quite surprising that Kathryn could be found in Sebastian's bed, fully dressed and spooned against him. His muscular arm was tossed naturally across her waist, and the fingers of her delicate right hand and his large left one were laced together. The immaculate pillowcase was slightly tattered with tearstains, but her granddaughter's expression looked peaceful for the first time in a very long time as she rested her head against her stepbrother's toned chest. Gaping open-mouthed at the attractive pair, Isabelle tried hard to focus on Cassidy's next words… and to contain her excitement. She always knew Kathryn and Sebastian would get together!

"… and she hasn't contacted me lately, so I was just wondering if you knew what was going on with her. Grandmother? Grandmother!"

"Huh—what's that dear?" Isabelle whispered distractedly, trying to ease closed the door to guest room she had assigned to Sebastian Valmont without waking anyone. However, her attempt proved a failure when she noticed that his ice blue eyes had silently slid open, and he sat there observing her, expressionless as usual. It was one of the things she would always wonder about the young man—his constant cool. While her own line had been bred this way, carefully crafted into the ice princesses they were, his own façade seemed to have spontaneously generated. The Valmonts were known for many things, but calm exteriors were **not** one of them. Snickering slightly at the memory of the infamous temper tantrums the wealthy men had thrown in the past, she realized that she had had the privilege of seeing the young Valmont lose it only twice. Now, she had found herself face to face with Sebastian in a rather embarrassing situation for both of them—her spying and him in bed with her granddaughter—but he met her gaze unflinchingly. The picture of utter coolness.

"I asked if you knew what was going on with Kathryn!" Cassidy demanded, and Isabelle had a mental image of her stamping her foot impatiently. It had always been one of her worst traits, picked up from television naturally. While endearing at first, Isabelle had quickly grown to resent the idiosyncrasy that her granddaughter hadn't seem to have been able to shake. It was a sign of weakness, in her opinion. It showed others that you were feeling frustrated, that they were gaining the upper-hand. It betrayed your irritation, even if your face betrayed nothing.

"No Cassidy, I'm not sure what's going on with Kathryn. I hear that she's doing _quite _well though," she drawled, casting a pointed glance in Sebastian's direction. At the mention of Cassidy, his beautiful eyes had widened slightly, and he was now burrowing his head into Kathryn's chestnut hair. The petite girl moaned slightly, readjusting her position to get as close to him as humanly possible. Whispering something indistinguishable in her ear, Sebastian's eyelids slid closed, and the corners of Kathryn's lips turned up into a tiny smile.

Tiptoeing silently out of the guest room, Isabelle Merteuil couldn't wipe the grin off her face. Not even the constant feuding amongst her kin could dash her spirit. In her opinion, competition was a good thing, and though she felt a little tinge in her heart about lying to one of her prized grandchildren, she would never forgive Cassidy for the triumphant look that had played across her face at the news that Kathryn was being shipped off to the Methadone Clinic. Only she had seen it, and for the first time in her many years, Isabelle Merteuil was truly disgusted by the young brunette. Kathryn and Cassidy had both crossed many lines, and were sure to cross many more, but they were still family, no matter how deep their jealousy of each other ran. To rejoice in the other's failure was simply low, not to mention detrimental to the family name. No, the thing that had her smiling wasn't evil in the slightest, which was more than slightly surprising. It had nothing to do with cruelty or betrayal or sex (three of her favorite things) but with the fact that two people had never fit together more perfectly than Kathryn Merteuil and Sebastian Valmont.

Oh to be young and not believe in love.

----------------

The wind whipped viciously. Rain came down in buckets, transforming the front yard into a moat that few would dare cross. The normally gentle pitter-patter of precipitation was replaced by a howling wind as sheets of water smashed against the window, obscuring the view of the blackening sky. While most were curled up, enjoying the warmth of their homes, Annette Hargrove refastened the tie on her white trench coat and heaved a sigh. Her father would be home any moment now, and supposedly bringing very important news. She just hoped that he would hurry up, as she needed to get to Sebastian's tomb. It was kind of silly really, but it was inconceivable to her that a day could go by without paying tribute to the man she had given everything to. She couldn't get through a day without going to visit him. Checking her watch again, Annette tapped her foot a little impatiently and made a vow to herself that if her father wasn't home within five minutes, she would simply have to talk to him later.

"'Nette, honey, are you home?" her father's voice called through from the small kitchen. Trying to hide her disappointment at the day, the blonde made her way from the living room to her father with a smile.

"Hey dad. I was waiting for you. You left me a message this morning that you had something important to tell me…" she prompted. Normally she would enjoy this time spent chatting with her father, but now she was just eager to get out of there.

"Yes, about that…" he began, frowning slightly. "Well, I just got an excellent job offer."

"You did? Why, that's great Daddy!" Annette chirped, genuinely happy for her father. However, a feeling gnawing at her stomach told her that his big news wasn't over yet. "What aren't you telling me?" she questioned, hating the suspicious tone to her voice. She knew that she had never been like that back in Kansas. Everything was so much simpler in the old days, but ever since coming in contact with Sebastian and Kathryn, her first impulse had been to question everything. _Kathryn!_ She mentally corrected herself. _It was **Kathryn**, not Sebastian_. Nearly two years later, and she still defended his memory as preciously as she did her mother's. When people were truly honest, they fondly remembered Sebastian as the smug, womanizing, SOB that he had always been. Annette wasn't like that. Maybe she was truly in love or maybe she wasn't honest, but she had repainted his image time after time in her mind, recalling their precious few moments together until he had become a romantic hero that no one could ever match up to. Not even the real Sebastian Valmont.

"Well, Annette… the job is in California," he explained slowly, and Annette could feel the world lurching to a stop around her. **_California_**?

"**WHAT**?" she shrieked.

"I know, I know, Annette. You hate moving, and I hate it to, but New York has brought us nothing but bad luck. We were so blessed that I managed to bag this job, after everything that happened at Manchester," he explained with more than a hint of resentment in his tone. His first semester would go down in infamy, marked by the death of Sebastian Valmont and the ruination of Kathryn Merteuil. Wicked as the children might be, their parents were equally rich, and none too pleased. Public opinion swayed with the wind, and the headmaster found his immaculate reputation damaged before he could wrap his head completely around the incidents.

"I know that dad… and I'm really happy for you… but New York…" Annette helplessly tried to explain, gesturing hopelessly around the room with a limp hand.

"What about New York, Annette? It's been two years, honey, and I hate to break it to you, but Sebastian Valmont is dead. There's nothing here for you or me, nothing except painful memories. I think a fresh start would be best for both of us," he waited with baited breath to see how his only daughter would react to that. Loaded moments passed in tense silence as her father could see the wheels of thought turning behind Annette's pretty blue eyes. Turning without a sound, she lurched open the sticky kitchen door and stepped out into the rain.

"Annette! Where are you going!"

"The cemetery," she called over her shoulder, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"In this weather? What for?" he shouted back incredulously.

"To say goodbye," Annette whispered, the lump rising in her throat altering her speech. Tears rolled down her pale cheeks, mingling with the drops of rain that seemed to pour to match her emotion, and her father didn't even try to stop her.

Maybe this would be good, she thought as her car rolled towards the cemetery. She had been there so often, she could practically drive there in her sleep. A little distance would do her good. Maybe California would bring something new, something better.

And something new it would bring. Something better all depends on who you asked.

----------------

_Well, here you go guys! There's a very good chance that that totally sucked, but please review anyway. I'm trying to shake this evil writer's block, and you guys always help inspire me. I felt bad for not updating this in such a long time, so I tried to put something out here. I hope you liked it, and thanks for reading!_

_Xo Sam_

_PS- I recently posted a one-shot called **Fade To Black**. It's a Cruel Intentions story, and could be looked at as a prequel to this one. Please, please, please go read it and review. _


	8. Collateral Damage

_For y-x, who instructed me to get back to writing. You took my suggestion, and I took yours._

_For Katie, who is pretty much my Cruel Intentions counterpart, and lets me babble on randomly even when there's no writing in sight._

**Breaking the Broken**

_Eight_

Collateral Damage

-----------------

_And they ended up… well making love isn't exactly what I'm looking for_

_But._

_You._

_Get._

_The. _

_Picture._

_Oh. What a wonderful caricature of intimacy._

PANIC! At the Disco

-----------------

The sole of the Prada shoe collided with the hardwood floor, and Cassidy Merteuil instantly regretted it. Why, oh _why_ couldn't she have picked up a better habit? Then again, considering that dear cousin's little habit was cocaine, she could probably do worse than to stomp her foot in frustration. But it was close.

Nothing was going right today. This was her firm conclusion after having taken fourteen showers to wash Patrick Bale off of her. Angered beyond any emotion she had ever felt, most of it was directed towards herself but there was plenty to spare for the co-eds who thought that they could pull one over on her.

They had set the trap, and she had taken the bait. Hook, line, and sinker. The mere memory of the previous day's events made her want to yank out her glossy brunette curls, screaming in aggravation. She settled for stamping her foot.

A small part of her was impressed. No one had ever dared to pull a stunt against her, they had never dared. Yet Jason and Patrick had not only tricked her into sleeping with the homely blonde boy, but also on losing out on another bet she had made. Prince Christopher Newborn was "the new guy" at Prestridge University, so not only was he gorgeous but he dined with the queen. Cassidy had had her keen brown eye on him since he first stepped foot on campus. Last night, she had been so close to having him, only to have Patrick burst in like a lunatic, ranting about how they had 'made love' earlier that day. The little fucker had even had evidence.

Cassidy knew how to give credit where credit was due, and their little scheme had been brilliant, on a minor scale. It definitely was the only way that she would fuck _Patrick Bale_. If they had pulled this one over on anybody else, Cassidy would barely be able to breath; she would be laughing so hard. However, the gorgeous brunette could barely breathe now, and it had nothing to do with laughter, but the rage filling her lanky body, consuming her mind.

_What would Kathryn do?_

That brought her thoughts back to her second agitation—where the fuck was Kathryn Merteuil! She hadn't heard a peep out of the hell hole where her cousin was residing in a little over a week, and it made her paranoid. Kathryn and Cassidy had conversed at least once every three days. It had been that way ever since they were children, and nothing had ever gotten in the way of that. Not even their new-found hatred during adolescence had put up a barrier for the communication. If Kathryn hadn't called, which she had been doing religiously (after all, there isn't much entertainment in rehab. She needed tales of scandal for the outside world for her to look down upon.) it either meant that something awful had happened to the petite brunette, or something wonderful that managed to capture her complete attention. Cassidy wasn't sure which prospect was scarier.

Sometimes she wished that she were part of a normal family, and that she and Kathryn were like normal cousins. They could turn to each other for advice and laughs and comfort. With their current relationship, that thought was laughable at the very least. If was difficult to get Kathryn Merteuil to laugh over anything that wasn't at someone else's expense. After the age of fourteen, Cassidy had only met one person who could manage it. Sebastian Valmont.

God, she missed him lately. Cassidy would acknowledge full well that she barely knew the boy, but she had had him inside of her and figured that that had counted for something. It pained her more than anyone knew when he didn't call her afterwards. She had realized that he was Kathryn's, would always _be_ Kathryn's, but that didn't really change anything. She still wanted him for her own. Cassidy's contentment was found in the fact that before his premature death, she had had more of him than her _dear_ cousin did. Now it was time to let that be enough.

Setting aside her emotional turmoil, Cassidy Merteuil knew that it was time to plot meticulous revenge upon the roommates. In her mind's eye, she was still replaying the events that led up to them succeeded in their scheme. In her physical eye, glancing across the courtyard from her spacious individual dorm suite, she could see Michael and Sheila. They had been together since, well, forever. Cassidy was kind of friends with Sheila. She was _kind of_ friends with everybody. She hadn't quite mastered Kathryn's "Everybody loves me and I intend to keep it that way,"… but it was pretty close. That was the story of her life, it seemed. Almost, pretty close, but not quite matching up to Kathryn. Shaking her bitter thoughts with a twitch of her pretty head, she refocused her cold eyes into the courtyard.

Michael and Sheila were probably already engaged, she thought with a sneer. Then it came to her—it was so perfect, and no one would ever see it coming. Cassidy would get back at both Patrick and Jason, and she didn't care much about the collateral damage.

-----------------

Green eyes following his silhouette around the room, Kathryn Merteuil wondered vaguely why she was always considered the beautiful one in their relationship…whatever relationship that might be. He moved around the room with a kind of elegance and natural grace. It was a bit like staring at a work of art, and having the illogical, uncontrollable urge to know exactly what the artist had intended, what it meant, the feeling behind it. Especially his eyes, those beautiful blue orbs that usually gave away nothing but an impression of haughty amusement. Back when life was normal, they could sit there, staring at each other for hours, trying to pry open the other for some semblance of an emotion. Rarely did they succeed, but that made it mean so much more when they had.

He didn't know she was awake yet. Sebastian ambled about the room silently, the only noise omitting from him was the soft humming. A deep, masculine, rumbling noise that she found comforting beyond words. Kathryn was torn—part of her wanted to clear her throat, announcing her alertness; the other part was content to just lie in the large bed, observing him in his natural environment. Frowning slightly, she tried to remember how she had gotten into his bed in the first place. It wasn't unusual at all, really.

At home, Sebastian had never slept much. It was like he was too full of life to be still for prolonged amounts of time. While Kathryn was just fine with lying in wait, a tiger surveying its prey, Sebastian was constantly on the verge of pouncing. In the wee hours of the morning sometimes, he would roam the house, looking for a diversion. Anything to pass the time. In a way, that was how Sebastian lived his whole life. There was no need for a young man of his position to work, or even learn, so school, and girls, and sex… it was all just a waste of time for him. Classic literature was his search for meaning in a life that had been stripped of it. The books in his bedroom gave clues into his soul where read in-depth, as Kathryn had discovered. He had read nearly every piece in the family's extensive library, but the ones that had really meant something to him had been relocated to his private bookcase.

_Easing the heavy oak door open, Kathryn cursed herself for having gone out at all last night. It was four o'clock in the morning, and she was just returning to the luxury townhouse where she resided with her mother and step-family. It was just her luck that on one of her latest nights, her mother was actually in town. Slipping off her Manolo Blahnik sandals, she crept silently into the house making as little noise as possible. _

_Court Reynolds, Kathryn's boyfriend du jour, had been hosting a party for a select group of friends. Namely, every athletic alcoholic in Manchester Prep, until the jocks were too drunk to notice who came in, in which case it became an open party. As girlfriend of the host, her presence was required. One thing led to another, and of course she spent the night. The poster girl of perfection, Manchester's pride and joy, was certainly not the type to fuck and run. Kathryn had spent the previous night catering to the sexual whims of her egomaniacal boyfriend. And she hadn't come once._

_Holding in the sigh of relief that she hadn't been caught yet but was almost to her bedroom, she didn't want to jinx anything. Her mother and the impotent asshole that the law had labeled her "stepfather" had a room in an entirely different wing of the house, but you didn't get to where Kathryn Merteuil was by being careless. She was half in her bedroom, the inner sanctum of the ultimate ice queen, when she was distracted by the warm glow of a lamp spilling out into the hallway from the crack in the library door. Creeping towards it quietly and wondering all the while exactly **why** she was doing it, Kathryn lightly pushed open the library door and came face to face with her stepbrother. This blonde head had just snapped up from his book, and his ice blue eyes were locked on hers, and to her surprise, _he_ looked surprised. _

_"Kathryn? What are you doing here?"_

_"I live here, don't I?" she spat back rhetorically. He smirked at her from behind his glasses, sliding them off his face and gazing levelly at her. In her seventeen years, Kathryn had had more men than most do in their lifetime, but there was something about Sebastian that always managed to turn her on. _

_"How should I know? You never come to see me anymore, Kat…" he pouted, laughter in his eyes. He closed the giant old book, and set it on the table next to him, eyes daring her to come closer. This was another instance when Kathryn had found herself torn over Sebastian—stay where she was, safe and in control of her motions, or move closer. Where her stepbrother was involved, it was always get as close as you could, fuck the consequences. Meeting his eyes defiantly, she moved smoothly across the room, perching herself on his knee. Contact had always been her fool-proof way of making him come unglued. _

_Swinging one leg around to the other side, she straddled his thighs and crawled forward slowly, her short skirt riding up. "Aww, I'm sorry 'Bastian. Is somebody feeling neglected?" she asked, using baby-talk instead of her normal tone. His large calloused hand dropped down to her toned thighs, tips playing against the edges of her lace underwear, but his eyes never left hers. _

_"Yes," he said simply. Off her incredulous glance, he added. "No bullshit. We used to hang out all the time, Kat." _

_"We still hang out," she muttered defensively._

_"Not like we used to," he had said, and she said nothing to refute this. There was nothing she could say, coming to the painful realization that he was right. _

_"I'm sorry," Kathryn admitted with a little quiver in her voice. "But it's not like your ever home! You're always out with Blaine, or some conquest, or—"_

_"Like that compares," Sebastian had said. "You know that I would ditch them for you in a second. I always have," he continued, and they knew that they both were flashing back to the Cassidy incident. "I guess you just mean more to me than I do to you." _

_"That's not true!" she protested. "You know it isn't," she whispered brokenly. She had always hated discussing feelings, but somehow this conversation of the early morning seemed different. It felt like it was okay now._

_He had said nothing, merely stared soulfully back at her. She met his gaze unflinchingly, feeling naked before him. Slowly, Kathryn leaned forward, capturing his lips with hers. In Kathryn's secret opinion, it had been far too long since they had last done this, and though it was usually him that initiated it, Kathryn Merteuil had never had any trouble taking the lead. He needed to know how she felt, but they were words that she couldn't say._

_She thought he would push for sex as he usually did, and she was kind of hoping he would. However, he broke away gently after moments passed, leaving their kiss alone, untainted. _

_"You should get to bed. You just got in," he told her unnecessarily. She narrowed her eyes at him._

_"And you didn't?" Kathryn asked with her eyebrows raised challengingly._

_"Kat, I just got **up**," Sebastian had said with a slight laugh. _

After that night, she had started quietly setting her alarm for 4:30 each morning, trying to catch him in a defenseless, sensitive state. Or maybe just to spend time with him at all. Some days he would read to her, passages that he found meaningful or relevant or containing a message he wanted her to decode. Some days they sat there in silence. Some days Kathryn would miss the alarm, and Sebastian would be a little quieter at breakfast than usual.

One night, Kathryn did as he requested—she went back to bed. But she brought him with her.

It wasn't the alarm, but a brutal nightmare which had awoken her. Kathryn had always been plagued by them, a nocturnal reflection of her conscious thoughts. Silently whimpering, she willed herself to get it together before she woke someone up. Naturally, Sebastian entered at that moment, cradling her in his arms until her nerves were soothed. Smoothing down her hair, he kissed her forehead and told her to try and get some rest. He had turned away then, but hadn't gotten very far. Her tiny hand and flown out, grabbing his own and yanking him down to the bed. Startled, he had toppled over easily, landing awkwardly beside her. Automatically, she had readjusted her body to lie directly against his. He said nothing of it that night, or the night after that, or every other night that Kathryn had crawled into bed with him. He just held her. It was the most he could hope for.

Kathryn made the decision then, in the guest bedroom at Tromperie Manor, as he turned back towards the bed, to feign sleep. He would probably be able to tell. He had always been able to read her like the books he loved so much. Thoughts churning upon this new analogy, Kathryn wondered if maybe, like the books in which he had looked so hard for it, he would be able to find meaning within her.

As his fit body slid in behind hers, arm curling protectively around her waist, she realized that he had come back for this. He had come back **for her.** As he placed a light kiss to her neck and settled back against the pillow, she wondered if maybe he had already found it.

--------------------

_Hey guys. Yes, I did update, like, yesterday. Sooner than you'd imagine, lol. But, sudden burst of inspiration, and here I am again lol. Please please please review and let me know what you think. You'll be my bestest friend! _

_Thanks for reading!_

_Xo Sam_


	9. Bad Meets Evil

**Breaking the Broken**

_Nine_

Bad Meets Evil 

---------------------------------

_The quivering liquids in your stomach _

_Will eat away at the bad habits that have made you _

_A real character in the story of your now distant life _

The Spill Canvas, _Black Dresses_

---------------------------------

A maniacal laughter echoed down the long hallway of the dormitory at Prestridge University. It could even be described as a cackle, and quite frankly, it was freaking Jason Argyle out. Tip-toeing down the hallway gingerly in pursuit of the sound, he paused with a sigh at his own door. He should've known…

"What the fuck are you doing, man?" he asked, shutting the door behind him. Plopping down onto the faded plaid of his bedspread, he propped his head up on his tanned and muscular arms and aimed his gaze at his roommate. Tears were flooding down Patrick Bale's face, but judging by the otherwise gleeful expression, they were tears of joy. Embarrassed for his new friend, Jason averted his eyes elsewhere. Anything to avoid looking at the moisture currently making its way down his face. But Jason's soulful brown eyes opened wide and his jaw dropped when he took in the sight of the only other occupant of the bed.

"_Seventeen magazine_?" he gasped, kicking out at it, as if it would contaminate him.

This seemed to snap Patrick back to reality. Though his eyes were still full of tears and he couldn't wipe the ridiculous grin off his face, he explained to his roommate, "Yes. There's something I think you'll find very interesting in there."

"I don't need the latest dating tips from Jonathan Taylor Thomas, thank you very much," Jason sneered, rolling onto his back.

"Heh. Turn to page sixty four," Patrick persisted. Rolling his eyes, Jason reached for the magazine and flipped to the designated page.

"A Virgin's Manifesto? Yep, I find this super-de-dooper-ly interesting. Dude, we both know the only way virgins are interesting is if…" comprehension dawned on his face as he took in the image of the smiling blonde, peering up at him from the center of the article. She was attractive in a common way, but certainly nothing special. However, there was something special about this particular girl…

"Is if they've been pursued by Sebastian Valmont? Yes, my thoughts exactly," Patrick said with a smirk. Jason could see the other boy's eyes scanning over the girl's profile, a predatory gleam in his eyes. It was almost frightening what the scrawny boy was capable of. If Annette Hargrove had been there in person, Jason may have even been a little alarmed for her. Glancing at the photo smiling innocently up at him, he called seeing the exact same one peeking up at him through the torrid pages of _Cruel Intentions_. He knew she'd looked familiar…

"Valmont. We owe him so much," Jason said in a somber tone, and both let a moment of silence pass for their deceased role model.

"Anyway," Patrick chirped, breaking the respectful quiet, "we both know that I've read that damn journal from front to back and have it practically memorized."

"Yes we do. Unfortunately for you, thinking like Sebastian won't make you look like Sebastian," Jason quipped.

Patrick shot him a death glare, but continued on as if he had never been interrupted. "And while I can find pages _mentioning _Miss Hargrove, there is not a single one claiming to have fucked her. Valmont wrote down details from every other girl, but not the infamous _Seventeen _virgin. Do you know what this means?" he asked, excitement in his voice and the fervor back in his eyes. Jason cowered away, almost imperceptibly.

"What's that?"

"He didn't get her! Sebastian Valmont didn't get Annette Hargrove to give it up before he died!"

"Hey! He would've if he had more time," Jason stated defensively. There was something almost sacred about the gorgeous blonde's memory, and it seemed necessary to defend it from the tarnish Patrick seemed to be implying.

"Of course," Patrick nodded, waving away the statement. "But he _didn't_ live longer. He didn't. Which means that her cherry is still up for the popping."

Jason's dark eyes widened with the realization over what his friend was implying.

"Her dad just took a job at Prestridge… supposedly can't get any work in New York anymore. Not that that's surprising. Fucking idiot. But that means that Annette will be around…

"Do you have any idea what this will do for my reputation?" Patrick mused aloud. Inadvertently, Jason's mind flew to _Cruel Intentions_'s record of Kathryn saying the same thing to her stepbrother. This couldn't end well…

However the darkly handsome boy couldn't say that he wasn't intrigued. Figuring that at least he was the 'Kathryn' in this situation, he humored his roommate.

"You don't stand a chance."

A cruel smirk twisting his light lips, Patrick turned his intense gaze upon Jason. "Care to make a wager on that?"

---------------------------------

Shiny varnish on the floors and surfaces made the entire house shine like a museum. In a way, it was a museum, preserving the memories and triumphs of the Merteuil family. It was kind of bizarre, and more than a little haunting, the way that the sparkling veneer seemed to trap all the emotions and events and secrets and lies beneath it, compressing the past into a hard, glossy finish. If you knew what it truly held, you would probably be afraid to be alone there. But Isabelle Merteuil was never alone for long…

The long black limousine had been out of sight for about an hour. Isabelle had watched it's slow decent down the mountain, mind full of possibilities of what could be going on inside and hoping that it was R-rated. No, she was no ordinary grandmother. While other people would be bored instantaneously by this activity, Isabelle had never been one of them. Her mind was churning with thoughts of her family, particularly the beautiful granddaughter who had just left her presence. The house didn't haunt her the way it did others, she found that it actually rather suited her on occasions like this. Isabelle was an expert at waiting. Like Kathryn, she was content to lie in wait and watched the prey fall victim, to watch all her plans fall into place. She had determined long ago that she would wait her entire life if it meant that she would succeed. It was just who she was.

Delicate fingers wrapped around an old-fashioned black lacquer phone, lifting it gently off the glass table. These were aristocratic fingers, ones that had never done a day of work in their lives.

Depending, of course, on your definition of work.

Waiting a moment to hear the slight buzz of the dial tone, she pressed down on the number two. A deep, masculine voice on the other end picked up, but she said nothing, a small smirk playing across her lips.

"Are they gone yet?" he persisted with a slight whine in his voice.

"Yes, they're gone. You can come in from the guest house now."

"About time," he said, and the following clicking signaled disconnection.

Moments later, the doorway filled with an impeccably dressed gentleman, about her age and about as attractive. Sandy blonde hair and green-blue eyes, he was rather good looking for a man of any age. Crossing the room in three brisk steps, his arms wrapped around Isabelle's waist, and although her gaze was still locked onto the outside world, a soft smile graced her aging face.

"Why didn't you tell me he was alive?" she lightly smacked his hand.

"Hell if I knew. I barely saw him when he was _publicly_ living," he chuckled softly, but a little sadly, as his lips found their way to her neck.

"Why don't you seem more surprised?" she asked suspiciously.

"There's not a thing that Sebastian could do that would surprise me," he stated, hands wandering. Off her confused gaze, he added, "only impress."

"Why don't we continue this _up_stairs, Madame Merteuil?"

"Lead the way, Monsieur Valmont."

---------------------------------

"Stop ignoring me, Kathryn. I want to know where we're going," Sebastian whined from the other side of the roomy limo, and Kathryn found herself experiencing déjà vu. She could've sworn this already happened. Oh yeah. _Last_ time they were on a trip. Rolling her eyes, she crossed her legs and looked pointedly out the window.

Twenty minutes of incessant whining later, and the limo found itself cast into merciful silence. However, Kathryn wasn't as pleased as she thought she would be. Casting a wary glance in her stepbrother's direction, her jaw dropped when she saw him gazing disinterestedly out at the scenic view from their car. He was going to ignore her now? Oh no.

"Sebastian?" she inquired, waiting for his eyes to snap onto her in that familiar way that always made it seem a tiny bit harder to breath. They never came. He responded with a "hmph?" noise, made from deep inside his throat, and she could feel her vibrant eyes narrowing angrily before processing the actual irritation.

"Don't you dare ignore me Sebastian," she spat. His left eyebrow raised a fraction of an inch, and a smirk seemed to tug at the corner of his pouty lips, but that was the only indication that he had heard her at all.

"Sebastian Valmont, you incorrigible bastard! If you don't speak to me right now, I will never speak to you again!" Kathryn shouted, venom dripping from her words. She could vaguely see the silhouette of the driver's head turning in alarm, but she knew that he would never take down the wall that separated the two compartments.

"Bet you didn't think you'd ever say that after the beginning of the trip, huh?" Sebastian asked, laughter in his own voice. He was fully smiling now, and Kathryn's own lips twitched upwards slightly as a reflex.

"Jerk," she mumbled, regaining her composure. Sebastian's light eyes lit up at the challenge.

"Aww Kat… don't be like that," he cooed. Green eyes narrowed in false malevolence, Kathryn relished the fact that she was back in control. Sliding across the aisle, Sebastian was sitting next to her now, and she found herself with very little personal space.

"Kaaaaathryn…" he continued in a sing-song voice. His large hand came up, gently stroking her cheek. Feeling her warm skin under his fingers, and no reaction on her part, he softly continued downwards, nails skimming her collarbone. Shivering slightly, her eyes locked onto his, but made no motion to stop him. Proceeding downwards, his hand slipped under her top, tracing dizzying patterns across her chest. Her breathing became labored, but she watched him as if entranced.

Max Santini had always been suspicious of the stepsiblings. While he knew of both their reputations, he knew perfectly well that you never knew what went on behind closed doors. However, every once in a while, something would happen between them that would make him question if it were more than just an unhealthy dose of lust. Yet despise how sickeningly taboo it was to have a sexual relationship amongst people who were siblings, by law if not by blood, he found himself kind of rooting for them. Mr. Valmont was surely a hoot, and Miss Merteuil just seemed to sparkle a little bit more when she was around him. So while some people would be disturbed by the fact that the bickering in the back seat had subsided, and all that could be hear were a few gasps, then a quiet moan, he wouldn't turn around. This driver's lips were sealed.

Tossing his black button-up shirt to the floor, Kathryn wondered what the fuck she was doing. She knew that this was wrong, that this wasn't something she should be doing right now. It was kind of hard for these thoughts to sink in with Sebastian half-naked, pressed against her. Kathryn Merteuil was a woman who had always been in complete control, mind over heart at all times. Now she found that just for a little while, she wanted to just _do_ instead of think about it and calculate her next move. A limousine on the way back from a hidden mansion on a large mountain in an obscure location seemed like the perfect place to do so. Hands tracing his sculpted abs, Kathryn knew that she wouldn't fuck him in the limo. But as his hand made their way up her thighs, she thought that that didn't mean they couldn't have some R-rated fun in the meantime.

---------------------------------

Techno music blared and neon lights shined. It was typical of the nightlife for students at Prestridge University, and this fateful night found Jason Argyle standing on line outside the city's "hippest" club with the object of his not-so-secret affection.

Cassidy Merteuil found herself in the middle of a crowd with a brilliant fake smile, standing next to the one person she would most like to strangle. Yet she had to laugh a little bit at the irony that Jason thought he could fuck her over so thoroughly and then they'd be cool again. _Wrong_. Clearly he didn't remember _Cruel Intentions_ in as much clarity as Patrick did. Keep your friends close, and your enemies closer. Cassidy would fake her smile and the witty banter that the two 'friends' usually engaged in, but she was just biding her time. They would get theirs in the end.

Smiling slightly as her thoughts wandered into the various things she would to do pay back the boys, it was a nice change from the typical blank expression it usually wore. However her wandering mind quickly snapped to attention when Jason seemed to inadvertently mention her favorite and least favorite subject—Kathryn.

"If you want so much to be like Kathryn, at least let me be your Sebastian," he said, tenderly caressing her hand, with a surprisingly hopeful look in his eye. While Cassidy would normally be amused or confused by this turn of events, she found herself growing exceptionally resentful. She actually wanted him to get away from her, as quickly as possible. Cassidy felt a loathing that she had never felt before at his words. He thought he could be Sebastian? He could replace Sebastian? Was he on drugs?

"Aw. Kathryn and Sebastian. Where are they now? Oh yeah. Methadone Clinic… and dead," Cassidy spat out, forcing her voice to retain the cold, mocking, detached fact it usually had effortlessly. However, the mention of Sebastian's name had put her on edge, and it was a challenge to keep the ice in her eyes and keep her mind on the conversation. _Sebastian…_

But now that her cruel words had been said, Cassidy could hear one thing. Or more accurately, it was one thing she could no longer hear. The sharp click-click of expensive sandals was now absent, and though there were a hundred girls there that night that could've been wearing them, the Merteuil could feel her entire being fill up with lead. Sensing someone's presence, she spun slightly on the spot and what she saw shook even the usually unflappable Cassidy Merteuil.

"Miss me, Cassie?"

A voice she had been hearing more and more in her dreams at night. Eyes that she could recall perfectly. Everything about him remained the same, maybe a bit more muscular. Yes, he was still gorgeous, and he was smiling at her like he used to. But the next thing she felt was a pang at her heart, as if she had been kicked in the gut. Yes, they were still dressed in coordinating colors, black this time. As if anything else really suited them.

His strong tan arm was wrapped around her dainty waist, and her perfectly manicured hand was tucked into his back pocket. Normally this would've caused quite the scandal, but they were miles from home. Here in California, they just looked like the hottest couple there. Only Cassidy and Jason saw it for what it really was.

The return of Kathryn and Sebastian.

---------------------------------

_Hey everybody. I'm very sorry if that sucked. I'm glad that you guys liked the last two chapters. I've just been dying to get this update out. And, you know, they all had to meet sometime lol. _

_Wicked vamp- I hope you don't consider this waiting too long. I tried. Heh. You totally stumbled upon something huge for the plot later…_

_Ocfan108- I'm glad that I could make you a little happier )_

_J- You crack me up. I seriously love your reviews. Unfortunately, Cassidy doesn't think the way you do._

_Katie- love hearing from you, as always._

_y-x- stop reading this. Now. Go update. NOW. Hahah. Wait, review first. And keep in mind what I said about the Cassidy-Belinda connection in my review lol._

_And thanks to everybody else who reviewed. Seriously, you made my day._

_And now, for some important announcements:_

_Thanks to everybody who read and reviewed **Fade to Black**. _

_Keep an eye out for a one-shot Cruel Intentions story that I'll be posting soon_

_Anybody who likes this story would probably also like my Cruel Intentions inspired One Tree Hill story **Beyond Good and Evil**. So please check it out and let me know what you think._

_And now, for some major advertising lol:_

_Katie (Valmontmerteuil) and I are starting up a Cruel Intentions Writer's group. It's for anybody who is currently writing, and it's a place for all of us to just trade ideas and help each other out. It's also a huge way to fight writer's block. Anyway, it's going to be really cool, and we already have a few great fanfic writers (pennames y-x, Cayster and Buffymaniac) on board. If you've read their stories, you'll know why I'm so excited about that. So any writers interested, please e-mail me or mention it in your review._

_Thanks for reading!_

_Xo Sam_


	10. The Past Reborns The Storm

**Breaking the Broken**

_Ten_

The Past Reborns The Storm  


_And he continued to stare at her, afflicted by the thought that where beauty was, nothing ever ran quite straight, which, no doubt, was why so many people looked on it as immoral._

John Galsworth, _The Forsyte Saga _

------------------

Stamp. Stamp. Stamp. Stamp. STAMP. STAMP.

She could feel her stinging foot, the wearing away of the sole on her Jimmy Choo's, but the fuck if she cared. The storm raging inside her lithe body showed no signs of calming.

STOMP. **STOMP**. STOMP. **STOMP**. STOMP.

Cassidy knew that she should calm down. Whoever had the dorm downstairs would definitely know that something was up, they would come upstairs to try and find out what the hell was going on, they would expect civility. And that was something that Cassidy Merteuil was _not_ in the mood to give.

She could hear a knocking at her door, but she didn't have the time or excess energy to answer them. She didn't give a fuck who they were or what they were about to say, anyway. Vaguely recognizing Jason's dulcet tones coming from the other side of the maple door, she just turned the stereo up louder. She didn't need to hear what he had to say, and he didn't need to see her break.

The pounding on the door seemed to go in time with the loud, angry, rock music, and Cassidy realized how blatantly obvious it was that she was lashing out. Anybody walking down the hall would hear the tunes blaring from the normally completely inconspicuous room. It was sloppy of her, that was for sure, and she could almost see her grandmother's disapproving gaze in her mind's eye, but she didn't care. Not this time.

That familiar gleam had been in her eye. The one that said so clearly, 'I win', the gloating expression was one that Cassidy had become very familiar with in all their years. Underestimation was a fatal mistake, and now Kathryn was back to show her _just_ how fatal. And she had brought **him**.

Sebastian Valmont. Cassidy would never admit it to anyone, but her heart seemed to beat faster and slower at the same time when she had heard his voice call out to her for the first time in so long, using the nickname that she absolutely detested on the lips of anyone other than him. Not for the first time, she wondered what Kathryn had done to get so lucky, to fall into a position where she would be in constant close contact with him. It was a typical display of the Merteuil in her that Cassidy completely disregarded the fact that they were _stepsiblings_, family by law, and that anything between them was highly scandalous and extremely forbidden. No, she was jealous instead.

The knocking had gone away now, but the pounding in her pretty head seemed to replace it. Maybe it was desperation setting in, or maybe it was the vodka shots, but she knew that there was plotting to do. Nothing compared to her usual, of course. When dealing with family, your plots must be less openly damaging and far more cunning. After all, nobody would be pleased if she got dear, sweet Kathryn sent off _again_, and Kathryn herself would surely catch on beforehand. Nobody pulled one over on Kathryn Merteuil. Yet perhaps the only person who stood a chance lay sprawled desolately across her king-sized bed in her dorm room, with maliciousness pounding messages to her brain and determination making its way through her veins. No, it was time that Kathryn learned she wasn't the only Merteuil you don't mess with.

------------------

"Did you see the look on her face?" she cackled gleefully. Sebastian rolled his eyes, slightly irritated at being asked this question for the fifth time in twenty minutes. Ever since Kathryn had woken up, all she could do was gloat on her slight victory over her cousin. However, Sebastian's insides seemed a bit heavier than his beloved stepsister's today…

_Aw…was somebody feeling guilt? Or maybe it was…_

Sebastian Valmont was beginning to see the downside of living on the road with Kathryn, and only Kathryn. While it was very exciting, and highly amusing at first, he was starting to find her incessant chatter not so endearing. Not to mention that because they were on the completely opposite side of the country than they were used to, and currently sharing a hotel room, so personal space was at an all time low. But all of this wasn't even close to the real reason why he was so aggravated by their situation—she wouldn't let him touch her. Try as he might, Sebastian couldn't put the events _previous_ to the clubbing out of his mind, but it seemed far from Kathryn's.

While living in New York, Sebastian was a man of very simple needs. He needed complete and total freedom, unlimited wealth, a bevy of girls and his disposable, whatever drugs and liquors he felt tempted to try, and sex. Was that really so much to ask? And while Annette had taught him a thing or two about conquests that would make any other man quake in fear at the thought of another one, Sebastian Valmont found himself quite willing to conquer new territory. Unfortunately for him, the only female in his reach was related to him by law and currently unwilling to fuck him.

_Cassidy_. The thought crept into his mind unexpectedly; his beautiful eyes shooting open in alarm. Trying to force the tension in his body to disappear, he tried to figure out what train of thought had lead him back to the beautiful brunette he hadn't dwelled on in quite awhile. While normally his mind came to a standstill on his sexy stepsister, the object of his lust and admiration for quite a while, at this moment, even though she was dressed in only a lace negligee and perched on the foot of his bed, he found his mind full of images of one of her worst enemies. Cassidy…smiling, laughing, angry, confused, lustful. Squeezing his eyes shut, he thanked God once again that Kathryn wasn't a mind reader. Unfortunately for Sebastian, she was pretty damn close.

"What's wrong with you today?" she asked suspiciously from the foot of the bed. Sebastian noted with a bitter smile that normally she would've crawled up him by now, taunting and teasing. Today, she remained firmly planted in her spot, and he wondered again whether their escapade in the limo could've brought on this sudden _weirdness_.

"Nothing… I, uh," he stammered a bit, his words getting caught up in his thoughts, tying his tongue. "I'm going for a walk."

"Fine. I'm going in the shower," she said simply, but there was still apprehensiveness in her bright eyes. "No, you can't join me."

Smirking as the bathroom door closed behind her, Sebastian slipped on a t-shirt and jeans, far more casual than his usual attire, but this was just for a stroll around the hotel, so he figured that nobody would ever know the difference. However, once he got outside, the smirk faded away and was replaced by a look of sudden panic. What had made him think of Cassidy? Naturally, it was because he was thinking of sex, and he had had sex with her… right? Shaking his gorgeous head, Sebastian decided that he did _not_ like where this was going.

Sudden movement at the end of the hallway caught his attention, and the elevator doors opened to reveal a young woman. This was no ordinary girl, though. There was something vaguely familiar about her, with long blonde curls, impossibly long legs and intense gray eyes. Sebastian pondered for a moment on whether or not he had fucked her before. No, that wasn't it… But the look she was giving him said clearly that she wouldn't object to it now.

As the elevator doors slid closed, two people were now inside, both facing forward but eyeing each other subtly. There was something about this girl that was so familiar. She had the coloring of Annette but the features of Kathryn, and he was equally alarmed and aroused by that.

"I'm Belinda. Belinda Van Ryan," she said with a sly smile, revealing a few of her gleaming teeth. All were white, even and perfect, and he didn't find that surprising in the least. She said her name with a sort of self-importance that few people could wear well. Kathryn was one of them, and apparently so was this gorgeous blonde.

"Sebastian Valmont," he grinned. Even his name was cause for an ego trip. While some rich children hadn't been so lucky in the naming department, Sebastian had made off quite well. Other children in social circles had floundered under the name Sebastian, but Valmont had taken it and made it his own. You had to be seriously hot to pull off a name like Sebastian.

"I know," she purred. Quirking a golden blonde eyebrow prompted the beauty to continue. "Everybody knows who you are, Sebastian."

The first thought that flew to his mind was, '_There goes_ _the anonymity we **thought** we had last night_,' and a smirk tugged at his full lips. However, the next thing he recalled was those lips being pressed against Belinda's, wandering hands, and an Emergency Stop button being pushed. Somewhere in the back of his mind, Sebastian registered that this might not be the smartest thing to do, but with thoughts of the Merteuils constantly tormenting him, this attractive creature was a welcome distraction.

------------------

She was as beautiful as he had described. Maybe even more so. While Sebastian was certainly gifted at descriptions, words didn't seem to measure up to Kathryn. Rereading her section in _Cruel Intentions_, Jason found that the words and images did no justice to the real thing.

And he wished that he could laugh at Valmont for being completely obsessed with a girl who had shot him down so many times. He wished that he no longer idolized the man. But he found that his envy had only increased since their brief meeting. _Damn_.

_She had barely let go of him all night, and it didn't look like Sebastian minded one bit. There was something about the two of them that seemed to crackle with electricity, an intensity so high that no one stood a chance of existing in a world that was all theirs. When one uttered something, the other's eyes would snap over and a connection so strong that it was palpable would be formed. And Jason sat in the corner beside Cassidy, and he knew that both of them were thinking of the same pair._

_He watched all night as they danced, and teased, and flirted, and even though any other person in the club would be repulsed to know their true connection, Jason found himself completely unbothered by that. What was bothering him was that he was just looking for an opportunity to talk to Kathryn, and with Sebastian stuck to her, it didn't look like he'd get one. _

_Leaning against the bar, Jason struck up a conversation with the bartender. She was cute, mid-twenties, and very edgy, but he also knew from experience that she was **very** easy. But that night, he wasn't looking for a challenge. However, her attention seemed instantly diverted and Jason sighed, knowing who was approaching without even turning around. _

_Sebastian ordered two drinks with a flirtatious smile, but as Missy turned away, he rolled his eyes and leaned against the counter. His intent gaze caught Jason's, but instead of looking away in an embarrassed fashion like other people tended to do, he proceeded to watch him._

"_I'm Sebastian."_

"_Jason."_

"_You're the one here with Cassidy, correct?" _

"_Yeah, we're friends. Do you know Cassidy?" Jason asked unnecessarily. He had read the journal, he knew all about it, but he had this inexplicable urge to impress Valmont, and tried not to come off as too pathetic._

"_You could say that," Sebastian responded, a wry smile curling his lips._

"_And you're here with Kathryn," Jason prompted._

"_You know Kathryn?" Sebastian asked, eyes narrowed suspiciously. Territorial, much?_

"_Cassidy's cousin," Jason shifted uneasily, by way of explanation. Sebastian didn't look convinced. It was as if the blonde boy could see right through him, but he didn't press further. _

"_Fuck her yet?" he asked abruptly._

"_Working on it," Jason smiled. Sebastian's smile seemed to turn victorious, and it made Jason's stomach turn as well._

"_I see. Well, I'd better get back to mi lady," he said, picking up the drinks and turning away. However, Jason couldn't resist getting this last question in._

_"Did you conquer **her** yet?"_

_Sebastian's eyes seemed to sparkle a little bit at the terminology used. He said nothing, only smiled mysteriously, as he made his way back across the room. _

_"Arrogant fuckhead," Cassidy spat, appearing from nowhere beside Jason. It wasn't clear who she was talking about. It was clear that she had had more than her fair share of drinks, though. Her large eyes seemed a bit unfocused, and her normal steady posture was slightly wobbly. When she looked at him, it didn't seem quite clear if she knew who she was with. Maybe she was just too drunk to care. _

_She was definitely too drunk to care that all her hard work, all the time she spent turning Jason down, was going down the drain in the alley she lead him to, behind the club that night. Not that Jason was complaining._

So now she was avoiding him. He had knocked on her door earlier, but was met only with the blaring of rock music. Jason wasn't sure what he had come for. Maybe an explanation, possibly a repeat performance, but he wasn't getting anything from Cassidy Merteuil. He wasn't sure if she was avoiding him or the world in general, but something had happened to her the night before that had rocked her to the core. If only he could figure out what it was.

------------------

Fog settled gloomily around the campus, seeming to match the overall tone of its students. On an early Sunday morning, where most were hung-over if not still drunk, the Prestridge University campus was a place where few people could be found. Especially at the St. George Church. However, there stood Annette Hargrove, alone in the courtyard with a map of the university, tolling bells signaling the dawning of a new hour. A new era, too, it seemed.

"Can I help you with anything?" she was asked by a slightly nasal sounding voice. Spinning on the spot, the pretty blonde was shocked to find that she wasn't as alone as she thought she was. The man standing there was blonde, of average height and average looks, but there was a slightly weasel-ish quality about him. Back in Kansas, or even in New York, Annette would've thought twice about speaking to a man like this one. His eyes seemed to glitter dangerously, but there was a pleasant smile on his face. Everything about him was contradictory. However, she had been brought up to look for the best in everyone. Besides, it's not like she had anyone else to talk to.

"Oh, I'm new here. I'm just trying to find my dorm," she said, faint frown lines forming when she realized that she was about to tell this stranger where she would be living. She tried to reassure herself that it was no big deal, because it was a dorm, and there were tons of other people living there. Besides, he wasn't a stalker, or a murderer. He was just a college boy.

_Just? Apparently her experiences in New York had taught her nothing._

"Oh, you're in Tourvel. That's this way," he pointed, linking his arm through hers and beginning to walk along the path. "Don't worry, I know where I'm going. My friend's in there too."

"Thanks for helping me out. My father just got the job as Dean here, and so I transferred over, but I'm hopelessly lost," she smiled, exasperated.

"Don't worry about it. Prestridge is huge. Half the people who've been going here for years still get lost."

"I'm Annette Hargrove."

"I know. I'm Patrick Bale," he smiled, and she had the spidery feeling that something was lurking under the surface.

"_You know_?"

"I read your manifesto," he said with a small smile. "Sorry, I should've said that first, you probably thought I was like stalking you," he blushed.

_You have no idea_, she thought, trying to calm herself down. It was getting tiresome, being constantly worried about the new people she met. She would somehow have to learn to trust again. Maybe California could do that for her.

"And do you usually read _Seventeen_ magazine?" she teased.

"Only when there are girls as pretty as you on the corner of the cover," he responded, and she laughed, ignoring that recurring feeling that something disastrous was in the cards. It was high time for Annette to learn that it was never her who held all the cards, but it was time for Kathryn to play her hand.

------------------

The water cascaded off her tiny body, spraying out at all angles. Mist distorted everything, making it seem fuzzier, softer in a way. Kathryn hadn't heard the door reopen. Sebastian hadn't returned.

Surprisingly, Kathryn was very calm about this. She didn't want to throw things, track him down, overreact at all. She was perfectly aware that he had probably found a random girl to fuck, and she was fine with that. Perfectly fine.

They were getting too close anyway. It wasn't healthy for humans to be that close to another person. They were becoming reliant, and weak, and pitiful. Or so she told herself. And that little ache she felt as she shut off the water, wrapped herself in a towel and exited the bathroom, finding their large hotel room empty? Oh, that was nothing. Certainly not pain, and definitely not jealously.

Forcing her thoughts back to her triumph, a giddy little smile slid over her beautiful face. The look on Cassidy's face when she had showed up was absolutely priceless. She was considering revealing their presence in a more delicate way, but then she had overheard her cousin's little speech.

_Aww. Kathryn and Sebastian. Where are they now? Oh yeah. Methadone Clinic... and dead. _

Those words had chilled Kathryn to her core, and not just because of the icy tone with which they were said. This was her cousin Cassidy decimating their relationship and all the work they had done, into one sentence depicting failure. Oh, no. Not on Kathryn's watch. At that moment, Cassidy lost her familial advantage, and Kathryn immediately began brainstorming ways to take her completely by surprise. Eyes falling upon her gorgeous blonde counterpart, she certainly found the way.

Now Jason was another story. She knew all about him from Cassidy's stories, and he was as good-looking as she had described. Nothing breathtaking, but thoroughly fuckable. Now **_he_** was properly respectful.

_If you want so much to be like Kathryn, at least let me be your Sebastian_.

That was seriously cute, in a retarded way. It was laughable to think that Jason imagined himself the successor to Sebastian Valmont, or that Cassidy could truly measure up to herself, but it was a nice little fantasy for the vapid California kids.

But Kathryn Merteuil hadn't come all the way across the country to play spectator to the amateur games. She had come to stir up trouble. And while most people can't always get what they want, Kathryn was not most people.

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_Now this chapter was supposed to depict a sort of whirling mess of the thoughts and feelings and fallout, but it may have just been an icky mess. Please review and let me know what you think. This is actually the longest chapter so far, I believe. _

Wicked vamp- glad you get my sense of humor lol. Don't worry, I'm not worried about you stalking me. Hahah

y-x- Now you on the other hand… hahah just kidding. Catch the cameo? Yes, I am a hypocrite. Belinda/Sebastian is exactly what I **don't** want in AIE! Although, you know...

WashedOut- I can't tell you how much I love the word 'wicked'. Lol

I love all you guys. Thanks for reading.

_So who caught the guest star? _

Okay everybody, please go read my newest Cruel Intentions story "Le Déchirement Final" The title is French. The story is not. (You'd be surprised at the questions I get… lol) If you do so, you will be my best friend. Haha. It's an Annette one-shot, which is very branched out for me, but it is in NO WAY an Annette/Sebastian story. So please go read it. Pwetty pwease?

Xo Sam


	11. Crash Into You

Mmkay, I just hope you guys are appreciating this, because people over at the OTH board are starting to resent me for neglecting them. Haha.

To y-x, who guessed more than you should've. Haha.

----------------

**Breaking the Broken**

_Eleven_

Crash Into You

_Well I can't regret_

_Can't you just forget it?_

_I started something I couldn't finish_

_If we go down, we go down together_

…

_You never knew, well, I never told you_

_Everything I know about breaking hearts, I learned from you_

_It's true!_

_I've never done it with the style and grace you have_

_But I've made loads of plans based on these mistakes_

Taking Back Sunday

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_Ding!_

The gold plated elevator doors gleamed in the light as they slid closed, Sebastian and Kathryn inside. Glancing at her watch every few seconds, the brunette seemed to radiate impatience, and Sebastian squirmed with guilt, wondering if his stepsister could somehow know what had taken place in this very elevator earlier that morning. There was no conceivable way for her to have found out, but this was Kathryn. Kathryn had ways that no one could comprehend, least of all the people she used them against. Sebastian would always come pretty close, but on occasion even he was baffled by the emerald eyes that seemed to see all.

"Stop moving," she snapped. He quirked a golden eyebrow at her.

"I'm sorry Miss Merteuil, am I bothering you?"

"Yes, actually," Kathryn smirked, and Sebastian made a face in response. She carried on, her tone sickly sweet, but with a poisonous edge. "Don't do that, _darling_. We wouldn't want you to get stuck like that. After all, not even the tramps here in good old California would be up for a round in the elevator with that."

"So you _do_ know about that…" he trailed off, looking down.

"Of course I know about that! Anybody in the entire fucking hotel could know about that! Maybe you've forgotten, but Sebastian Valmont supposedly died in New York almost two years ago. How would it look if he was fucking models in the elevator of a hotel on the opposite coast!"

"Probably similar to how it was when I was 'alive'," he quipped, but processed her words nonetheless. Kathryn was right, of course. They would have to keep a low profile until much later on, because as far as the public knew, the Valmont-Merteuil siblings were out of commission.

"Are you jealous?" Sebastian asked curiously, narrowed ice blue gaze focused intently upon his stepsister. He could see her black-ringed eyes widen at the question, but she made no move to look at him.

"Are you delusional?" she said bitingly. Sebastian refused to be stung by the blow.

"I think somebody's feeling a bit envious. Kat, if you're pissed that I was with that airhead bitch, then just say it. You know I don't care."

"Exactly Sebastian. Why would I say anything about anything you do? You _don't_ care. You **never** care. You do your thing, I'll do mine, and we all know what you do best. If you need a reminder, why don't you go ask the toothpick you were with before? Or how about the hundreds of others back in New York, or any other place the family had ever vacationed, for that matter?"

"That's not what I meant," he said through gritted teeth. "I meant that I don't care _about them_. If you want me to stop, I will."

"You'll what?" Kathryn asked, startled. This was not how she had anticipated her morning going. She was supposed to give him the silent treatment, they were both supposed to be irritated, and it was supposed to casually blow over as all their other disputes had. A heart-to-heart wasn't on the agenda, but with a four foot squared elevator surrounding them, she didn't really have another alternative. Only nineteen more floors to go…

"I'll… stop, I guess," he shrugged. He hadn't thought about that before saying it, and was wishing that he had now. Yet Kathryn's response shocked him—hysterical laughter. Clutching the hand rail tightly, she was nearly hunched over in laughter, tears of mirth forming in her eyes. Sebastian took a moment to appreciate the sound of her true laughter—a light, golden, tinkly sound that always managed to make him smile, as opposed to her trademark cold laughter, which elicited a smirk—until he recalled that it was at his expense.

"Excuse me?"

Gasping her words out through hysterics, Kathryn managed to convey, "You… goin… to… gi…up… girls… fa... Hahahahahahhahahahahaa." Sebastian found this less funny than his stepsister seemed to.

"You don't think I could?" he frowned.

"Sebastian! Are you insane? You had _twelve_ girls on **prom night**. One night! And you think you can give them up for the duration of the time you're with me? Sebastian, it could be years!"

"So? If it bothers you, I could try, I guess…" the slight frown lines in his forehead deepened.

"It doesn't 'bother me'," she sneered, crossing her arms defensively over her chest.

"Then what the fuck is your problem?" he shouted.

"I don't have a problem," she stated simply. Moments passed in silence, and Kathryn waited on edge for Sebastian's caustic reply. However, a more tender response awaited her when they reached the fifth floor.

"I know what you're trying to do, Kat, and it's not going to work. You **_can't_** push me away. Deny it all you want, we're best when we're together, and no amount of debutantes or toys are going to change that."

She said nothing, and he didn't push the matter any farther. Sebastian noted with slight satisfaction that exiting the elevator, she did link her fragile arm through his own.

A flash of blonde in the corner of the exquisite lobby caught Kathryn's eye. Sebastian didn't appear to notice it yet, but there was a tall, gorgeous woman in the corner waving him down. Part of her was tempted to point her out, just to see her stepbrother's internal struggle. The other part didn't want his eye straying at all. And so she kept quiet, giving the girl a sharp, evil look from the corner of her eye as they passed. Kathryn had to admit that she was surprised that the blonde didn't look away or flinch, but stared straight back at her with impossibly light gray eyes. There was something hauntingly familiar about that face…

But the revolving doors were spinning now, and it was time to go. Leaving thoughts of the mysterious girl in the back of her mind, Kathryn proceeded out into the warm California sunlight with Sebastian on her arm, and both of them on better terms than they'd been on in days.

----------------

It was an entirely different blonde, but Kathryn Merteuil was running scared. She wasn't even positive if it was her, but she wasn't willing to take the chance. Heart pounding in her throat, her mind raced, trying to find a way to steer Sebastian in the other direction with utmost nonchalance. A vice-like grip with her claw-like red nails stopped him in his tracks, and he just managed to contain the yelp that threatened to escape.

"What the fuck!" he demanded, outraged. Then he took in her widened green irises. "What's up?"

"Huh? Oh, nothing. I'd just rather go this way," Kathryn said with unconvincing nonchalance.

"Well, if I recall correctly, the dorm is that way…"

"Well, you would know," she trilled pointedly, a dark look casting itself over her beautiful face. Sebastian rolled his eyes. This again…

"That wasn't in college," he answered sweetly.

"Ah yes, how could I forget? You know, I slipped up for a second there and forgot that it was my life's work to keep track of all of your different sexcapades and their date, time, and place."

"You said it, not me."

"You're such a child sometimes, Sebastian."

"Ouch. Kat's claws are coming out. Here kitty kitty… what's the problem? I thought that our conflict was resolved?"

"What conflict? I was just telling you to stop being such a fucking moron."

"I'll get right on that," he sneered, but bit his tongue on the insulting come back that came to mind. While their banter was usually something he enjoyed greatly, Kathryn didn't seem amused, and he wasn't about to push it. He was in deep shit as it was.

"So, where are we going now that we're heading in the _complete_ opposite direction of our previous destination?"

"Well, I'm still going. I'm just taking the scenic route."

"Right, because those are your walking shoes."

"Maybe not, but the heels would be perfect for shoving my foot up your—"

"Sounds kinky," Sebastian mused.

"Pervert."

"You love it."

"You're delusional," she scoffed with laughter in her eyes.

"Perhaps. Kathryn, where the fuck are we?"

"This again? I can't bring you _anywhere _anymore! All you do is whine!"

"Maybe I wouldn't if you'd just tell me what the hell is going on!" he whined, sighing at her disbelieving glance. "I said **maybe**."

"Forgive me for not taking you at your word, but you aren't what we'd call an up-standing man."

"Yeah, I'm usually better when horizontal," he shrugged.

For the second time that day, Kathryn found herself doing something rare. A true, genuine laugh escaped her tightly-pursed lips, lighting up her face, and Sebastian bit his lower lip to keep his own smile inside.

"Okay, stop distracting me. I need to go see her," Kathryn said, shaking her head.

"I still don't understand why. What is so fucking important about this?"

"It's a… family issue."

"Yes, and as your stepbrother, I feel that I'm privy to such issues."

"Well, I'm sorry to hurt your feelings," she smirked. Glancing cautiously back towards the Tourvel building, Kathryn registered that the coast was now clear, but probably not for long. Now was the time to make her move. "Okay, well, our lovely stroll is over. Go… amuse yourself. Preferably not with any co-eds, but we'll see how long your new vow lasts. Try and keep a low profile. Head to the library or something. Nobody besides weirdos like you ever step foot in them."

"Real mature, Kat," he tossed over his shoulder, already on his way. Sebastian really wasn't in the mood for one of Kathryn's soliloquies, no matter how much she loved them. Walking casually along the cobblestone path, cigarette playing lazily across his pouty lips, his ice blue eyes took in the scene at Prestridge University. It wasn't anything special, he decided. If Manchester Prep had dorms, it would be Prestridge. Although, that was probably intentional. All of the upper-class was tied together with strings of conditions and webs of deceit. All the insipid wealthy assholes were the same, it would only make sense for their dwellings to be similar.

The sunlight glinted off the top of his blonde head, catching the eye of a girl three floors up. Her wide blue eyes widened in shock, blinking a few times to confirm what she was seeing. After the third blink, he was gone. Eyes narrowed in confusion, suspicious. With a sigh and a shake of her pretty blonde head, she determined that she was just seeing things again, that there were plenty of blonde boys in the world, but with that came the painful thought that none of them were _him_. The blaring stereo overhead was starting to give her a headache. Rock music was _definitely_ not her thing, but she definitely didn't want to be starting any conflicts with her new neighbors. Closing the blinds as she shut out the sight, Annette Hargrove realized that California wasn't as far from New York as she thought.

----------------

Smarting knuckles rapped repeatedly on the maple door, but the music blaring from the other side gave no signs of recognition to her presence. However, Kathryn persisted.

"GO AWAY! I DON'T WANT TO FUCK YOU!" Cassidy's voice screamed over the music. A wicked smile twisted her cousin's lips. Calmly removing the elaborate skeleton key from her Gucci purse, she daintily swung open the door.

"Well, that wasn't really the goal for this visit. Sorry cousin, but I draw the line at incest," Kathryn quipped, a real smile tugging at her lips now.

"Hmm… some might beg to differ. Speaking of, where _is_ Sebastian on this fine day?" Cassidy countered, a spark igniting in her large, cold eyes. Kathryn's own eyes narrowed dangerously, but she opted not to take the bait.

"So, who could it be that you're avoiding?" Kathryn mused sardonically, a warning flashing in her bright eyes. They seemed a little brighter than usual, as was her usual when she had cruelty on her mind. Or when she was aroused. For Kathryn Merteuil, it was usually the same thing.

"I'm not _avoiding_ anyone. _Avoiding_ people is for cowards," Cassidy claimed, chin tilted defiantly to look Kathryn straight in the eye. Rising from her place on the large circular bed, her words oozed with malice. "Which probably explains your stint at Tromperie Manor."

"Ooh, somebody's clever today. Although you probably had to suck off the butler to get this so-called insider information. You should start doing more for your sources, Cassidy. Judging by last night, your snitch didn't clue you in as to the fact that I wasn't alone. For any portion of the trip, for that matter," Kathryn simpered, innuendo lacing the last few words. She enjoyed the cloud of envy that seemed to sweep over her cousin's pretty face.

"Well, you're never alone for too long, Kathryn. Except for your brief stint in rehab. From what I hear, you didn't have too many visitors there. Guess mommy and daddy couldn't be bothered with the trip," Cassidy shrugged. "Not even J—"

"_Don't_ say it," Kathryn warned, the threat in her eyes all too real. Cassidy relented. Even as a Merteuil, there were lines that you did not cross. This was one of them.

"While you visiting did grandmére mention Bel—" Cassidy began to ask, courage and curiosity overwhelming caution and good-breeding.

"Good God no," Kathryn snorted. "Does anybody?"

"The tabloids," Cassidy sneered.

"Yes, and we all know how much this family loves negative publicity."

"Well, nobody knows that she's related anyway."

"Thank God for small favors," Kathryn sighed.

"Hm… seems to be a lot of religious mentioning going on. Still into your little habit?" Cassidy asked, pointing towards the large crucifix wound tightly around Kathryn's bony wrist. While around most people, she would curl her arm up instinctively, Kathryn let it hang down, examining the jewelry casually.

"Not so much. Sebastian's ridiculous about it. If he comes in when I'm trying, he suggests fun in… _other ways_…" Kathryn trailed off delicately, a mischievous smile contorting her face. Cassidy rolled her eyes, readjusting quickly to her cousin's constant hint-dropping. It had been a while since Kathryn had any ammunition against Cassidy, and she knew that she'd hold onto it for a while. Moments passed in a comfortable silence.

"So, you fucked Jason last night?" Kathryn asked casually, green eyes glinting.

"Yeah… alley behind the club," Cassidy sighed. Her eyes had gone wide with alarm at first, wondering how Kathryn could have possibly known that. Of course, going over that again, her answer had been painfully obvious—she knew because she was Kathryn. Kathryn just _knew_, it didn't matter how or why or if it was even possible.

"Ew," Kathryn wrinkled her pert little nose. "1-10?"

"Eight, _maybe_. Then again, I was drunk off my ass, so my judgment could be clouted."

"I don't know. Sebastian tells me that the only time I ever tell the truth is when I'm drunk."

"Yeah, because he's somebody who has the right to lecture others on honestly," Cassidy snorted. She kept her tone carefully light, but Kathryn noticed the cracks in her façade. The underlying pain shone through, and it took all her will-power not to exploit that.

Anyone onlookers would think that this was an innocent scene. Two girls, so alike and yet so different. Both with perfect complexions, shining intellects, sparkling personas carefully crafted for the public eye. Both so beautiful, and yet so damaged. So beautifully broken. Both sat straight up on the bed, years of immaculate posture drilled into their subconscious. They looked vaguely uncomfortable, but that was far from the truth, because with those years of good breeding came years of memories. While they certainly weren't all good ones, they came with a sense of familiarity that few could provide. They sat in comfort, exchanging quips and insults and anecdotes that someone managed to be left out before. The laughter was never hysterical, the talk never giddy. They were Merteuils, through and through, but deep down, they were a family too.

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Okay, I'm totally going to be late for my plans tonight, but I just **had **to post this before I went out. I hope you guys liked it. I got a little stuck after the first part, because I wasn't sure how much I wanted to reveal in this chapter, but it should be much smoother sailing from now on. Please review and let me know what you thought.

y-x: THANK YOU. This chapter is for you. You gave me an honest evaluation, and I appreciated that. You touched a little too close for comfort on some of the things I have coming up though, and I'm glad that that was a private e-mail lol. Hell yes, I'm hating on Matieu and Belinda, as is any self-respecting K/S-er.

J- Yay! You're back! I missed you! I adore your reviews.

Katie- Lol I think last chapter rubbed everybody the wrong way. Thanks for helping me out though…

Luvs-bitch01- Hehe, you didn't like that? **Good**. Hint hint. I'm glad you like this story though…

I'd love to respond more in depth, but I am so freaking late right now. Thanks for reading!

Xo Sam


	12. The Lady In Her Spare Time

**Breaking the Broken**

_Twelve_

The Lady In Her Spare Time

---------------

_You're not the same as you were before_

_Tell me what are you like behind closed doors_

_I can't take this anymore_

_To see these people slippin' out through the back door_

Pillar

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A moan he had heard a million times before could be heard reverberating throughout the hotel suite. Looking up suspiciously from his book, Sebastian carefully laid down _The Prince_and rose from his armchair. Making his way down the hallway, the sounds got louder and louder until Sebastian found his ear pressed against the ornately carved bedroom door. A very masculine grunt that he knew for a fact that his beloved stepsister didn't make signaled him to the fact that she was not alone. Disappointment soon gave way to curiosity, and maybe a little bit of anger. Who was she to lecture him on fucking random people in the hotel?

Then again, who was he to complain?

One large fist poised centimeters away from the hardwood of the door, Sebastian paused before knocking. He was instantly thrown back to another time, in a situation not too different…

_"Just a minute!" she had chirped, clearly out of breath from her own variation on exercise. A sliding noise could be heard, and it was clear to Sebastian that the "secret" drawer under her bed had been open. Mentally counting down from seven, he heard the drawer slide closed and Kathryn call out "Come in!" as he reached "one"._

_"Well, you obviously wanted me to witness your little adventure, or else you wouldn't have invited me in. Now, where is your friend who gives you such pleasure?" they shared a smirk as he slid open the deep blue drawer, revealing Ronald in a very… revealing outfit._

Last time he had involved himself in her "adventures", things had not ended well at all. It was another significant point in the road to war between the two volatile stepsiblings, and Sebastian wasn't sure if what was on the other side of that door was something he wanted to see, invited in or not. The tentative peace treaty continued to stand between the two. Yet they both knew they were standing on shaky ground.

A loud groan from the other side snapped him back to the situation at hand. Without a second thought, he pushed lightly on the door, and it sprung open and he strode confidently inside as if he had no inkling of what was going on within the bedroom.

It would be a beautiful scene to others. Sunlight cascading gently in through the bay windows, pale blue curtains swaying gently in the breeze. In the center of the large bed, a couple lay entangled in the ultimate expression of love. Her porcelain-skinned fingers entangled in his dark hair, eyes closed enjoying the moment. However, Sebastian was not others. Sebastian did _not _find this beautiful, he did _not_ know who this guy was, he did _not_ want his cum in his bed.

Or his stepsister, for that matter.

As the door made contact with its stopper, Kathryn's electric green eyes shot open. While most women when caught having sex would be horribly embarrassed, not Kathryn. Smiling lazily, she adjusted the dark silk bed sheet to cover herself slightly better, and tapped her companion on the shoulder. His dark head swung around quickly, meeting Sebastian's steady gaze with bright green eyes. Blushing furiously, he lowered his eyes, quickly locating his boxers on the floor, sliding them on as Kathryn stole the sheet for herself.

"I don't think you two have been properly introduced," she drawled, enjoying the flash of jealousy across Sebastian's handsome face, ignoring the awkwardness in the room, and the discomfort radiating from her bedmate.

"You didn't tell me you had a boyfriend," he shifted, slightly defensively.

"You didn't tell me that either, Kat," Sebastian smirked, laughter in his voice.

"This is my stepbrother, Sebastian," Kathryn rolled her eyes. The post-orgasmic haze seemed to be clearing, and her ice-cold exterior was beginning to form around the edges. The fuzzy warmth in her light eyes was starting to sharpen and fade, clearing the lines which had previously been blurred.

"_Sebastian_? Your stepbrother? _Sebastian _is your _brother_?" the brown-haired boy seemed repulsed. His handsome features distorted and he cringed visibly, shaking his head in disbelief.

"**_Step_**brother," Kathryn muttered defensively, crossing her arms over her chest. Her mystery man scoffed, looking under the bed for his shirt. Sebastian's golden eyebrow arched in interest.

"And you are?" he prompted, irritation showing slightly.

"Oh, hey. I'm Sean," the brunette male offered, his tone surprisingly casual. The look in his eyes, however, was anything but. He seemed much more comfortable now that he was fully clothed, but Kathryn's eyes remained stubbornly on the door, avoiding Sean's irate gaze.

"Oh well Sean, don't let me interrupt. You two seemed to be having plenty of fun," Sebastian's intense gaze pierced Kathryn's. She didn't smile, but she didn't look away, raising her dark eyebrow in a challenge.

"Something tells me she'd prefer you," Sean spat, picking up his leather jacket and tossing it over his shoulder. "You two are seriously fucked up."

The door slammed closed, but neither paid it any attention. Though no one was here to witness it, this was a time just like so many others before it. At the first hint of contact, both Kathryn and Sebastian seemed to slightly lose touch with reality. Their world no longer extended beyond the pristine walls and ritzy furnishings of the hotel, and no one existed there beyond the two of them. An intensity that few others could sustain locked in with them, an essential part of their relationship that no one could ever hope to understand, or to accomplish.

"Jesus Kathryn, is the hotel hosting a Boy Scout convention? Where the fuck did you find that guy?" Sebastian snickered slightly, crawling into bed with the petite beauty.

"Looks like somebody's being visited by the green monster," Kathryn mocked, tugging a cigarette out of the black leather purse perched precariously on the bedside table. Wordlessly offering him one, Sebastian declined. Watching the flame flicker tenderly, the only sound in the room was the light but steady breathing of the pair and the click of the flint on stone, again and again. The breathing continued alone, longer after the clicking had died away. Snatching the cigarette away from Kathryn, Sebastian propped it between his lips and stared thoughtfully at the ceiling.

"What the fuck? I asked you if you wanted one," Kathryn protested, mouth slightly agape.

"Is he the first guy?" he asked, catching her off guard.

"The first guy to…what?"

"How long have you been screwing around?"

"With Sean? A few hours. Could've been longer if _somebody_ learned how to knock."

"You know that isn't what I meant," Sebastian glared.

"Are you for real? I just spent the last year and a half of my life in a fucking rehab center, oppressed by nuns. Why do **_I _**have to be celibate?" she ranted. Sebastian rolled his beautiful eyes irritably.

"You—"

"Oh, God forbid I enjoy sex. Far from the Upper East Side, but I'm still Marsha-fucking-Brady!"

"Kathryn, I believe I've already heard this speech."

Entangling herself further in the sheet, she cast a disbelieving glace at her stepbrother. A slow smirk spreading across her delicately featured face, she crawled across the large bed, silk sheet draped across her toned body, like a predator approaching its prey. Sebastian continued to puff away on the stolen cigarette, smoke wafting lazily towards the domed ceiling. For someone so handsome, it was astounding how existentialistic he managed to look on some occasions. The dark attire, bored expression on the finely chiseled features and graying smoke swirling about seemed to make him the picture of the tormented artist, the ideal model of discontent that some of the most famous writers in history had attempted to capture. The smoke seemed to cloud not only the room, but her senses.

Before either of them could process what was going on, she was lying on top of him, their noses gently nuzzling against each other. Lowering her lips to his neck, Kathryn sucked gently, whispering all the while.

"Oh Sebastian, I'd _so_ hate to bore you."

The sneer was evident in her voice, but Kathryn didn't stop her ministrations, her tiny left hand tracing the intimate contours of his muscular chest, going lower and lower and…

"Ooh," Sebastian let out a tiny groan, before squeezing his eyes shut and reopening them. The eyes are always said to be the windows to the soul. Darker lines of blue criss-crossed and weaved about, casting contrasting patterns against the brighter blue. They seemed to contain a thousand images and thoughts and feelings, while never revealing a single one. The windows to Sebastian's soul, or perhaps lack of it, were stain-glass, and how appropriate, for there had never been a more stained person. They veiled what he was truly thinking. In most instances, you look to a person's eyes while they speak to confirm their sincerity, but in Sebastian's, it was best if you looked far away. The dizzying patterns and contours weaved together into a thing of splendor, and you had a better chance of falling under their spell than of seeing the truth.

This was the mistake Annette had made. While looking into those light orbs, she had fallen under the spell that had taken in so many before her. It's true; she could find some genuine emotion in there. She was so taken in by what she saw that she ignored what hid in the dark, the shadowy corners, the pieces that were never elated. Annette could see he felt, but she could never see the true depth of his emotions. People like her, good, kind, decent people, could never comprehend the real feelings of people like him. It was best that she could never see the brutal truth, the honesty in his eyes that would lie there in wait. She would never know what to do with it.

"No, that's the one thing I can always say for you, Kat. You keep it interesting…" he rolled them over, reversing their positions without breaking contact. Pinning her gently to the bed, Sebastian's hand began to wander too, tracing courses across her cloth-covered torso, feeling goosebumps appear in its wake. Pressing his lips to her ear, Sebastian taunted, "I guess your little friend was right. You don't seem to mind too much that I've taken over," he whispered hotly, his breath causing her to shiver. Contrary to his expectations, she didn't push him away, just mustered up a weak, "Fuck you."

"One day. Hey Kathryn… why did he say that?" asked Sebastian, curiosity getting the better of him. He regretted the words as they slid from his lips, but by then, it was too late. He could feel her stiffen below him, before catching his hand with her own and tossing it off. Sitting up briskly, he watched with interest as her transformation from the girl lying in the bed to the girl sitting atop it. From vulnerable and hot to invincible and cold. It was truly a wonder.

"I have no idea," Kathryn said, giving up her struggle with the sheet to pull it from below Sebastian. Dropping it to the floor, she strode confidently the path to the bathroom and called over her shoulder, "What are your plans for today?"

"I have to go see someone important," Sebastian muttered distractedly.

"Who do you know in California!" Kathryn called back, her voice echoing off the bathroom tiles, bouncing around the large room of porcelain and glass, giving it a hollow quality by the time it reached his ears. Sighing, Sebastian contemplated how easy it would be to just lay his golden head back upon the pillows and go to sleep. Unfortunately, there was a matter more important to him than almost anything in the world waiting for him, and he had disappointed them too many times before.

"It's not in California. I'll probably be back by tomorrow. Just… make sure they change the sheet before I get back," Sebastian cringed, shutting the door behind him. Sliding on his mirrored sunglasses, he strode down the hallway, the objections and questions of his sibling by law but definitely not by practice shut out. The elevator doors slid open at the end of the hall, and the girl inside was familiar too. An eerie sense of déjà vu swept over Sebastian as he took in the form of a smiling Belinda Van Ryan. God, did she live in that fucking elevator! True, she was gorgeous and a good fuck, but there was only one girl in the world who had ever managed to truly hold his attention in that department, and he had left her in the hotel room.

Turning, Sebastian decided it'd be better to take the stairs.

---------------

_Hey guys. I know that this chapter didn't have too much in it, but it'll be **really **important later on, so take note! Lol. This is all laying the foundation for some extreme things to come… so get ready…_

_Wicked vamp- Lol yes, Kathryn was exaggerating. Sebastian is not a dirty employed gigolo. Although if the family ever goes bankrupt, he could definitely rake in a lot that way, don't you think? Lol. So this answers your question about what happened to Kathryn's sex life. Hint: behind closed doors._

_Luvs-bitch01- Oh, I just **love** your reviews. I'm glad that you like what I did with the relationship between Kathryn and Cassidy. It's a very tricky one. And just wait to see who else gets into the mix in the coming chapters…_

_Yes, insert diabolical laughter here._

_Katie- so I guess this means you don't get to stalk me for at least… oh, another day. But I had so much fun plotting out the coming twists, that I might just let you anyway. So now you get to feel all special with your gigantic spoiler. Haha! _

_Mags- I'm glad you're reading this now too. Haha, I've missed talking to you. Sorry I kept you up lol_

_I'm not sure how this turned out though, so please review and let me know what you thought._

_Thanks for reading!_

_Xo Sam_


	13. Hello, Little Girl

**Breaking the Broken**

_Thirteen_

Hello, Little Girl

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_Human beings are the only species capable of endless evil and endless cruelty_

_But also endless compassion and endless hope_

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_Forget about the notion that _

_Our emotions can be kept at bay _

_Forget about being guilty, we are innocent instead _

_For soon we will all find our lives swept away _

Dave Matthews Band, _Seek Up_

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It was all in the cough. The breath ripping its way viciously through the raw red throat, emitted the rasping that struck fear into the hearts of all around that she would be taken from them again. This sound garnered sympathy, concern, desperation to make things right. Most children did not have this advantage over others. Most people wouldn't consider this an advantage at all, especially not when considering the painful scar that accompanied it. However, she was not most people. It was in her blood to exploit the weaknesses of others, and to use what could become your own weakness to your advantage. None of this changed the deep red scar, age having done nothing to fade it, which stretched brilliantly down her small chest, accented by the pale glow of her porcelain skin. But it helped, a little.

This feeling had been described to her once, in a bedtime story told by her cousin. She had only heard it once, but she never forgot. Her mother had been outraged that she had heard such thing, but her mother was always a bit of a twit. The walls were closing in a bit, the stern faces seemed to loom a bit larger, and the expression in them was harder than usual. Her breath froze in her lungs as she realized that this would be hard to get out of, that a sweet smile wouldn't cut it this time. Cassidy had never told her that she wouldn't be able to breath. Then again, it wasn't her story to tell.

The wheels began to turn behind her beautiful blue eyes. The cogs spinning at hyper speed in her mind, the principal's office starting to spin a bit as well. _Was this how Kathryn felt?'_ she found herself wondering. If so, she had just developed an entirely new level of respect for her cousin. The idea came in a flash, as all her best ones tended to do. Clutching her frail hand to her chest, fingering her scar lightly, the breath frozen in her lungs shot out violently, as she fell to the floor, limp as a rag doll. A sudden flurry of nervous activity overtook all the occupants of the office, including the victim and her family. Rushed phone calls were made, people running frantically about, hollering for help. No one except her father thought to peek down at her angelic face. He was the only one to notice the slight smile curve her pale pink lips as she peeled open one cerulean eye and winked at him, before her eyelids drooped and face fell slack.

The king sized bed seemed to swallow her whole, her fragile body drowning in a sea of silky sheets and down comforters. Propped up against a gigantic pillow, her blonde curls cast a halo about her head as her large eyes blinked fearfully up at the doctor.

"No, Mister Merteuil, I think she'll be just fine. She does show signs of exhaustion, so I suggest keeping her in bed for a few days. She was probably overexerting herself."

"Yes, she certainly does keep herself busy," Alain Merteuil responded, with an amused twinkle in his dark eyes. Exceptionally attractive, even as he reached middle age, Alain viewed the world with a sort of detached cynicism that could be rivaled by few. A typical trait of those he had been born too, he was not horrified by the misdeeds of others but actually found them quite entertaining.

As the medical professional left the room, he cast a concerned glance over his shoulder at the tiny beauty. His view of her was then obstructed by the heavy wood door shutting quietly behind him, and he shook his head, striding briskly down the long hallway.

Letting out a relieved sigh, the young girl slouched against the pillows and clicked on the television, finding her favorite soap opera. She immediately immersed herself in the daytime drama, as her father observed quietly.

At the tender age of six years old, Juliette Merteuil had already managed to get the world on a string. Her large blue eyes and golden blonde ringlets made her a stark contrast to most of her family, but the similarities were deeper than skin could portray. Charming and engaging, Alain had a feeling that his beautiful daughter wouldn't have had a problem coming out on top, even without the medical problems that caused people to hover anxiously about her.

Some nights he woke up, panicked, body drenched in a cold sweat remembering that night so long ago. Only three years old, and already plagued with what they could hope would be the worst to come of her precious life.

Juliette hadn't made a noise. Children should be seen and not heard, her mother had told her on many an occasion, and she obeyed in a way typical for the Merteuil in her—namely, at the worst possible opportunity. Alain wasn't sure what had alerted him that night, what made him realize that something was terribly wrong. This intuition led him to his toddler's bedroom, where he was greeting with the image that haunts his nightmares. Ghastly white and gasping, clutching desperately at the skin and bones that made up her frail torso, Juliette was curled up on the very same bed she rested in presently, convulsing violently. She had been so ill for so long, and those difficult three years culminated into the pain that shook her feeble body, causing silent tears to spill. The rest of the night was a blur, and his dreams seemed to make it a fill-in-the-blank, every night ending with a different possible outcome, all of them usually death. And every night, he would race down the hall, fling open the doors, and his precious daughter would be sleeping peacefully, a contented smile on her face as shallow breaths filtered in and out through her little ski-jump nose.

"Now what do you have to say for yourself, Miss Merteuil?" Alain demanded of his daughter with mock-seriousness. He could never be angry with her. Juliette could commit any number of crimes, and judging by her bloodlines, she would be more than capable of them, but she would never be tainted in her father's eyes.

"Thank God that's over with. Do you have any idea how dirty the floor is in Principal McNamara's office?" Juliette asked, wrinkling her tiny nose in disgust. "Hey daddy, do you think you could donate mops to the school?"

"I don't know sweetheart, are you planning on pretending to faint there again?"

"Are you accusing me of something, sir?" Juliette's eyes widened in false indignance, before the six year old succumbed to laughter. Chuckling good naturedly, Alain made his way to the bed, propping himself up next to his child.

"So…why'd you do it?"

"Faint?" Juliette asked in confusion.

"No, of course I know why you did _that_. Why did you tell Claudia Daigle that her father would lose his job if she didn't let you be first in line?"

"Because I'm psychic?" Juliette chirped.

"Try again, pumpkin," Alain smirked.

"Well, he would've!" Juliette insisted. "He works for you, daddy! That means that he works for me."

Laughing slightly at his young child's reasoning, Alain found no grounds to argue with her. It was true—Mr. Daigle had been working at the Merteuil Corporation for a few years now. He worked for Alain, but Alain worked at the whims of Juliette.

"Is Auntie Cadee coming over today?" Juliette asked, her clear eyes glued to the television screen as the drama unfolded. Alain smiled involuntarily at the thought of the spunky brunette who had fought so hard at the beginning. Cadee Thomson had never wanted to be one of _those_ girls, the ones who had an affair with their boss. Honestly, Alain had never wanted to be one of _those_ guys, who claim to love one woman when their heart belongs to another. Neither of them was in their ideal situation, but neither could bring themselves to leave.

"Juliette Merteuil, for the five hundredth time, she is not your aunt."

"Would you prefer if I referred to her as what she really is?" her thin eyebrow rose in a challenge, and at that moment, she was the spitting image of his own mother. It was ironic, in a way, all the connections to the Merteuil clan that his child seemed to have when he had married Camilla Bertrand with the intention of breaking free from his old lifestyle. An infamous playboy, Alain had caused quite a stir when he took up with the virginal Camilla. Though his mother Isabelle had sworn that it would never last, he had married Camilla. When she became pregnant with Juliette, his hope had been to bring someone as kindhearted and pure as his wife into the world. However, Juliette turned out to have nothing in common with her mother besides glossy blonde curls and big blue eyes, and Alain found himself perfectly okay with that. People who weren't particularly twisted tended to bore him.

"No, that's fine," Alain clucked. Rising slowly from the bed, he smoothed down his beloved child's hair as her sleepy eyes locked with his own. "You should probably get some rest, sweetie."

"So then should I come back later?" a masculine voice rumbled from the doorway. Without looking, Juliette knew who it was, recognized the voice she hadn't heard it years. All traces of sleepiness gone, the frail six year old launched herself out of bed and across the room, landing in the waiting arms of Sebastian Valmont.

Sebastian, his step-nephew or something ridiculous like that, was supposedly dead, of course. However Alain found himself relatively unfazed by him showing up at the family home. He wasn't into poetical shit like the "meaning of life" or "living life to the fullest", but he saw a lot of himself in Sebastian, and figured that Sebastian, like himself, just wasn't done with the world. Their paths hadn't collided very often, but it was just wrong to think that the boy was dead. Alain felt slightly contented that Sebastian was alive, but it was still rather eerie to see your child in the arms of a young man you had thought dead for the past two years.

Sebastian was tall, with curly blonde hair and deep blue eyes, and honestly, he looked more like Juliette than her own family did. There was a strange bond between the two of them that seemed deeper than a blood connection could ever give them.

_It was heart wrenching, the look in the young girl's eyes. Deep pools of blue, pouring out their emotion in earth shattering sobs. _

_"I have some bad news, baby," Alain had begun gently. His tongue seemed thick, the words too heavy, his soul made of lead. Juliette was only half-Merteuil, but it seemed she was more of one than he was. She could read him like a book, and she stiffened accordingly._

_"It's 'ebastian, in't it?" her voice was higher than usual, which was certainly saying something for the four year old. The slight lisp that laced her speech was more prominent. _

_"Um, yes…" Alain had begun, slightly suspicious. He wondered how much his daughter knew or if she had just read it off of him. Still, he tread on eggshells while trying to deliver the blow._

_"He's dead, isn't he? She really did it. It finally happened," she choked, and he could almost see the lump that had risen in her throat. This was when the tears began to fall, subsiding quickly into bawling. Alain found himself helpless for only the second time in his life, both revolving around his young Juliette. Reaching out to hold her, to comfort her, to do anything to try and take this additional pain from her, Alain Merteuil was hurt when she cowered away. She curled herself into a tight ball, ghastly white and shaking. Slowly, she regained her composure, sitting up and blinking as if awaking from a long sleep and finding a whole new world in place of the one she had left behind. _

_"What do you mean by 'She really did it. It finally happened'?" Alain asked in confusion. From what he heard from his sister, Sebastian's stepmother, he had been hit by a car and died in the hospital a few hours later._

_"Kathryn," the young blonde had said harshly. Alain's eye's narrowed in confusion. **Kathryn**? Catching his confused gaze, Juliette sighed exasperated and continued. "Sebastian always said she'd been the end of him." _

_He laughed to himself quietly at this. He could only imagine, Sebastian Valmont, notorious playboy and Manhattan's resident deviant, confiding in a four year old. "Honey, that's only a figure of speech. Kathryn had nothing to do with Sebastian's accident."_

_Juliette's large eyes blinked up at him, clearly disbelieving. Honestly, he himself wasn't too sure. It was a common whisper, a dirty little secret among the Merteuil clan, that the relationship between the two stepsiblings wasn't exactly wholesome. Beautiful, sweet, intelligent Kathryn was surely not exactly as she appeared, and Sebastian… well, Sebastian's reputation preceded him. It was only a matter of time before their games caught up with them._

_"Are you feeling okay?" he had asked her, deeply concerned that the color still hadn't returned to her face though her tears had long since ceased._

_"My heart hurts," she had said simply, staring distantly through the window at the dark landscape surrounding the manor. _

_"Do you need to see the doctor?" _

_"No. He can't help. Sebastian'll still be gone," Juliette sighed hoarsely, bottom lip quivering._

That had been all she said for months, in response to why she was so pale, so tired, so lifeless. It was as if the young girl had lost her puppy, but everyone knew that Sebastian meant much more to her.

"My heart hurts," she would reply listlessly, and as concerned as he was, Alain was always slightly jealous. How much did _he _mean to his daughter? Would she be this distraught if he were gone?

"You are a big fat _secousse_!" Juliette pouted, pounding her tiny fists against Sebastian's muscular chest.

"Watch your mouth, mademoiselle," Sebastian laughed, planting a small kiss on the young girl's forehead, pretending he hadn't heard her muttered response of "_bâtard_". Carrying her easily back to the bed, he plopped her down on top of it, lightly tickling her sides. "You need to eat a sandwich, skinny girl."

"I hate sandwiches," she pouted.

"Since when?"

"Since forever! If you were here, you'd know," Juliette glared.

"I'm sorry Julie," Sebastian sighed, frown lines creaking his forehead.

"That's okay!" she chirped, all the hurt she had lived with for the past years forgotten. That was the beauty in being a child, so young and untroubled. If people were gone, they came back. If they said sorry, they were forgiven. It was a simple action-reaction in Juliette's mind, leaving her with no doubts that Sebastian should be forgiven for leaving her for so long. If only Kathryn thought the same way. Leaning forward in interest, she asked him, "So tell me, what was heaven like?"

"I wasn't in heaven," Sebastian laughed, his true laugh.

"Then where were you?" she puzzled.

"All sorts of places," he hedged.

"Like where?"

"Like the Greek islands," Sebastian conceded, mentally searching his mind for a single place he had been, rather than the broad 'globe-trotting' he tended to write it off as, perfectly willing to forget all about it.

Juliette remained silent for a moment, her brow furrowed. "Is that like heaven for rich people?"

"Sort of," Sebastian laughed, and Alain chuckled from the doorway.

"Can we go there sometime?"

"We can go anywhere you want," Sebastian smiled, and Juliette beamed in response.

"Let's go to New Guinea!" she clapped in excitement.

"Why?"

"Cause that's where they make guinea pigs, duh."

"How are you, Alain?" Sebastian asked, turning his attention to the man. Juliette did the same, eyes interested, as if she was only just seeing him as Sebastian was, instead of having spent most of her life with him.

"I'm good. And how is the afterlife treating you, Sebastian?" Alain quipped.

"Fine. How's Cadee?" Sebastian smirked. _Touché_.

"She's wonderful," Alain replied through gritted teeth.

"I'm sure she is," Sebastian drawled suggestively.

"Well, it's been a long day so far, and I think I need a nap. I'm off to bed," Alain began after a few tense moments of silent during which Juliette's large eyes slid back and forth between the two, as if watching a high-stakes tennis match.

"I can't imagine whose," Sebastian said with a large smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. Glaring, Alain turned and shut the door behind him.

"Phew. Thank God he's gone," Juliette sighed, relaxing against the pillows, overdramatic in the way that only a spoiled prepubescent child could be. Sebastian turned an amused gaze upon the young girl. "It's just that I never know how much he knows. So I feel like I should just play dumb until he's gone."

"You don't have to play _dumb_, Jules. Just stop doing things that'll get you in trouble," Sebastian said sternly. Steely blue eyes met their match in the other as the two blondes reached a stalemate, before Sebastian broke out into laughter. "Okay, fine, be good at hiding it."

"I _am_ good at hiding it!" Juliette protested.

"And so I've heard. What's this I heard about you threatening Claudia Daigle?" Sebastian asked, his eyes sparkling with suppressed mirth.

"Oh. Well, you see," Juliette heaved a long-suffering sigh, "she took my place in line. I just wanted to be the line-leader, but she stepped in front of me, and she wouldn't let me pass. It was quite rude."

"And that's the whole story?"

"Well, no. By took my place, I mean that I stepped in front of her, and then she stepped back in front of me. But, you know, you move it you lose it," Juliette shrugged her bony shoulders, a twinkle in her light eyes.

"How'd you get out of that one?"

"I pretended to faint on the principal's office floor," she admitted easily.

"That's my girl. I told you that you could always use that to your advantage," Sebastian laughed.

"Yeah. The floor was really hard, too," Juliette shifted, rubbing her shoulder lightly.

"Yeah? Are you okay?" Sebastian asked, moving closer to inspect any possible damage.

"Of course. Sucker," she laughed gleefully, bumping the supposedly-injured shoulder against Sebastian's much broader one, before settling herself in his lap. "So, are you taking me back with you?"

"Back where?" Sebastian asked, playing with her long blonde curls. In the back of his mind, he registered that if he and Annette had had a child, she would look very much like Juliette Merteuil. Curly blonde hair, clear complexion, beautiful blue eyes. However, Sebastian knew that there was no child in the world who could compare to the one he currently held. Truthfully, he valued her over any member of his own family, but he felt that way towards most of the Merteuil clan. While the Valmonts were bloodsuckers, each and every one of them, there was an exciting variation among the Merteuils. You had your gold-diggers, entrepreneurs, upstanding businessmen, less upstanding business men, trophy wives, black sheep, artistes, and even the occasional few who tried to break free and live away from the family legacy.

"Back to wherever you're living in hiding with Kathryn," Juliette replied, in the same tone in which she had informed him that guinea pigs were 'made' in New Guinea. As if it were the most obvious thing the world had to offer its occupants.

"What makes you so sure that I'm in hiding with Kathryn?"

"I know that she isn't at the Clinic anymore. I heard mommy and daddy talking about it the other day. They said that she's missing, but grandmere didn't seem too worried. So that means that _she_ knows where Kathryn is."

"That doesn't mean that she's with me."

"Yes it does. You're Sebastian and Kathryn. Kathryn and Sebastian. You're always together. You _have_ to be," Juliette said, frowning slightly at the inconceivable notion that quite possibly her two favorite people in the world could live without each other.

"Yeah, Kathryn's with me," Sebastian said, letting out a noise that was half-way between a laugh and a sigh at the realization that a six year old had concluded what had taken everyone else so long to figure out. Apart, they just didn't make sense.

"Well, are you going to take me to see her, or am I going to have to track her down myself?"

Sizing up the tiny blonde, Sebastian knew that she wasn't one to make idle threats. If she wanted to find Kathryn, she most certainly would. Sebastian had a feeling that if Juliette had had an inkling that his death was a hoax, she would've found him too. Part of him wished that she would have.

"Do you want to come with me?" he asked seriously. Her entire face lit up, as if he had promised her her own country or that every day would be Christmas.

"Of course!" she replied breathlessly, giving the matter no real thought. In her mind, it was simple—she could stay at home, where her parents adored her but didn't quite know her and didn't exactly love each other; or she could go with Kathryn and Sebastian, who adored her and _knew_ her and loved her and each other, but didn't quite know it yet.

"You don't even know where we're staying," he laughed.

"I'm sure it's very nice," she said solemnly.

"It's in California."

Widening her eyes slightly, she echoed his statement. Then realization dawned upon her face. "Cassidy's there too, isn't she? What's Kathryn's up too?" she asked with a malicious sort of glee that seemed too mature for her youthful existence.

"Your guess is as good as mine, Julie. But you really want to come? You hate warm weather. I really don't think that the humidity will be good for you—"

"If you think you can leave me behind again Sebastian, you're dead wrong. Wait, not dead. Just wrong. Very, very wrong," Juliette said stubbornly, blonde tendrils falling across her face.

"Alright, then rest up. I'm gonna go talk to your dad."

"Don't bother. He isn't home," Juliette said, eyes returning to the television. "He's always with Cadee."

"Does that bother you?" he asked.

"Not especially. I don't expect him to be home. I'd leave if I could. I'm leaving now. It's just mom here, and she's a Bible-thumping hick," Juliette sneered with great disdain.

"Where the hell did you learn that term?"

"Kathryn," Juliette said simply. "And grandmere may have used it a few times. Usually in relation to a girlfriend you had a few summers ago. I don't recall you telling me about any girlfriend, 'Bastian," her gaze turned accusing.

"It wasn't very serious," he shrugged.

"So you were cheating on Kathryn?"

"**What!**Juliette, Kathryn isn't my girlfriend."

"But you love her," she said simply, sorting his entire existence into a few phrases in the way that only she could do. With all that she had been through in her few years, Juliette had come out on the other side with damaged health and an aged soul. Sebastian found that they were kindred spirits in that sense, wise beyond their years, jaded beyond reason. But he couldn't help but be taken by the way Juliette still managed to find certain joy in particular things. Presently, he couldn't figure out why it was so hard for him to tell her she was wrong.

"Kathryn's my stepsister, Jules."

"So? Cadee's dad's like secretary or something. He loves her, why can't you love Kathryn?" she asked. "Oh wait, did you guys break up? Break ups are hard. I guess that's why my parents haven't done it yet. You guys should really think about getting back together, because I'm pretty sure she loves you."

"You think so?" Sebastian asked, a wry smile tugging at his full lips as he thought of his sudden introduction to _Sean_ only hours before.

"Yeah, I'm sure," she said distractedly.

"And you're sure you want to come back with me?"

"Yeah, I'm sure," her eyes glued to the television program she had been trying to watch since she returned from school.

"And you're sure that Santa Claus is real?" he asked, testing to see if she was listening at all. To his mild surprise, she responded in kind without taking her eyes off the screen.

"Don't be ridiculous, Sebastian," she replied with a withering gaze.

"Are we taking your car?" she called happily, skipping down the path from the foreboding front door of her home. Carrying only her backpack for her, as their luggage had been packed up by the help, Sebastian pulled her back suddenly.

"Yes, we're taking my car. So you know what that means?"

"That I can't touch anything 'cept for the radio," she nodded, familiar with the routine. Lifting her easily, he plopped her into the passenger seat. "Can we stop for sandwiches on the way to California, Sebastian? I think I'm getting too skinny."

His golden laugh filled the distance, the true one that so few people managed to evoke. As they made their way back to California, the blonde duo that was alike in so many ways, Sebastian couldn't help but smile. He had certainly missed Juliette. Yet he couldn't shake the feeling that he was driving into the eye of a storm.

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_Hey guys. So… what do you think? I'm not sure how this turned out, but please review and let me know what you think._

_There's a certain kind of irony in this new Merteuil being introduced in Chapter **Thirteen**, don't you think? _

_Hint: You should_

_Katie- YAY! Juliette's here! Now we must get prepared for the attack… muah ha ha! Love you._

_Luvs-bitch01- Now you know who Sebastian's been neglecting… what do you think? Good adding of characters? I hope so lol. Trust me, we're **nowhere **near the end of this story._

_Ocfan108- I really love your reviews. Probably more than you like updates. Haha. I'm glad that you enjoyed the eye description. They're usually what I look to in photographs too, but it's nice to have a professional opinion lol._

_y-x- So true. Who isn't under Sebastian's spell!_

_Thank you guys for reviewing!_

_Thanks for reading!_

_Xo Sam_

_PS- I do have a new one-shot. I can practically feel you all rolling your eyes. Hahah. Anyway, it's **very** different (no, that doesn't mean it's an A/S! .:my turn to roll my eyes lol:.) but please go check it out. It's called "Life In A Glass House"_

_PPS- Katie, remember my threat. K/S all the way... _right?


	14. Vent

_For y-x, who inspired me to haul my sick ass back to the computer and get this update out. For anyone who hasn't read Alea Iacta Est (which is pretty much nobody! Lol) you **must** go read it now. _

_Perhaps you're right. Delusional's not such a bad state… _

**Breaking the Broken**

_Fourteen_

Vent

_Your conversation never sticks_

_'Cause no truth in you exists_

_Yeah, you bite before you lick_

_I love ya but you're such a prick_

Collective Soul

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_When surrounding yourself with friends isn't enough, it's time to look for allies_

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It was **the** "can't miss" party of the year. At least, until next week anyway. It was a who's-who of Prestridge University as the entire in-crowd and anyone who managed to wrangle an invite or sleep with the bouncer packed themselves inside the trendy club. Naturally, her highness Cassidy Merteuil was there to mingle with her loyal subjects. She had yet to run into them, but knew that Jason would be lurking around here somewhere, and along with him would be Patrick. Silently fuming at the very thought, Cassidy realized that she had been so preoccupied with her cousin's sudden surfacing in good old California that she had been completely derailed from a task of utmost importance—making those assholes wish they were never fucking born.

The fumes of anger extinguished quickly as her large light brown eyes locked with a pair of electric green ones. Though the club was small and crowded, packed with people and smoke of all sorts, she would recognize those eyes anywhere as the ones of her tormentor and –though she realized it with a sickly horror—best friend of the last fourteen years of her life. Politely excusing herself from the crowd gathered around her who were too stoned to notice anyway, Cassidy began to meander her way across. However, she would not get there uninterrupted.

A tall black boy, rather handsome but nothing she hadn't seen before, slid into her path. He reminded Cassidy a bit of some loser musician Kathryn had mentioned she was fucking briefly last summer. What was his name…? Roland? Robert? RONALD! There we go. She knew it reminded her of the McDonald's clown. Quirking an eyebrow at the hands that seemed to find their way around her waist, Cassidy questioned him in a frosty tone that would make anyone else get the hint. Anyone _else_.

"I'm Desmond. Des, to my friends. You can remember that name, you'll be screaming it later," he winked at her. He actually winked. Eyes widening, Cassidy leaned forward imperceptibly to reassure her that the offender was completely wasted. Unfortunately, her hypothesis proved incorrect. He was sober as the day is long, and equally cheesy.

"Sorry _Des_, but I'm not interested," Cassidy stated simply, detaching his hands from her bony hips and taking a step around. Desmond was not to be deterred though, stepping directly in front of her and brining his calloused hands up to her face. She flinched visibly, appalled that someone had the gall to touch her. Who the fuck did he think he was!

"How can you say that? You don't even know me," he whispered softly, fingers caressing her cheek softly, apparently missing the blatant disgust flashing in her eyes.

"Now _that_ is where you're wrong," Cassidy said triumphantly, tapping his chest pointedly for emphasis. "I do know you. I know you, and dozens of other guys just like you. I'm not interested in them, and I'm **not** interested in you. Now will you get the fuck out of my way?"

"Oh, playing hard to get, are we? Fun," he licked his lips lasciviously. Grabbing her wrist suddenly, he tugged roughly and began to pull her through the crowd. Eyes wide, in alarm this time, Cassidy felt herself begin to fill with panic. Everyone here was under the influence of something, and nobody would know the difference if she happened to disappear, and Desmond easily outsized her. But she was a Merteuil, goddamn it, and she wasn't going anywhere without a fight.

"LET ME GO!" she screamed, and a redhead in the corner looked up vaguely with a large smile on her face.

"Hi Cassidy!" she beamed, waving her arms broadly, causing her to lose her balance and promptly topple to the ground from the stool she had been sitting on. _Strike Two. _

Gripping the bar with talon-like fingernails, Cassidy held her thin body in place. For the first time in her life, she cursed herself for being so thin. At first she ignored the persistent tugging on her left arm, pondering briefly how much cover up it would take to mask the bruise that was surely forming. As she decided she would simply wear a sheer sweater instead, the jerk jerked her arm, launching her forward. Struggling to maintain her balance, Cassidy marveled at how there wasn't a single person in this section of the club that seemed to be aware of the fact that she was being assaulted. She could feel hatred, resentment, disgust building up inside of her, and before she knew what she was doing, the same nails that had latched her to the bar were prying open the laces on her heavy heeled sandals.

"Oh Desmond," she cooed flirtatiously, and before she thought it through, Cassidy launched the shoe at him with more force than she knew she was capable of.

**Never** underestimate an angry Merteuil.

"Bucking bitch! Boo broke 'y bose!" he shrieked, and Cassidy took a perverse pleasure in the girlish shriek he let out as the shoe smashed into him, followed by the sickening CRACK that seemed to snap everyone in the section back to reality. Sure, _now _they were functional!

Blood gushed from the nose in a steady stream, and the obvious shape-change made it clear to anyone looking that it was broken. Far from remorseful, Cassidy picked up a vodka shot from the bar, toasting him calmly before tossing it back with a smile.

"Now if you'll excuse me," she simpered, gliding past Desmond and concerned bystanders. Out of nowhere it seemed, Kathryn appeared. She had a tendency to do that, to be seen only when she wanted to, to hide in plain sight. It was a trait that Cassidy was convinced she had gotten from their grandmother, the ability to camouflage yourself and lie in wait for your prey to do themselves in. Shaking her head, her deep brown curls flew as she shook the morbid thoughts from her mind.

"Well, that was quite the show," Kathryn smiled, the neon lights casting an eerie yellow-green sheen over her pale skin, making her appear very surreal.

"I'm glad you enjoyed it," Cassidy ground out, anger flashing across her pretty features.

"Oh, calm down," Kathryn spat, "it's not like he was going to hurt you."

"Oh no, rape is always pleasant," Cassidy volleyed back.

"Well, you'd know," Kathryn snorted, the sound reverberating through the cup half covering her face. Suddenly, an idea seemed to come to her, enlightenment sweeping over her face. "Half empty or half full?" She held out the cup to her cousin, who peered down her nose at the amber fluid.

"Empty," she drawled, confident in her answer. Kathryn did not, to Cassidy's surprise, fire back with a witty retort. Convinced that she was walking into a trap, Cassidy had opted to just be honest. Instead of the big secret being revealed, Kathryn merely smiled, a small, secretive smile that agitated her more than any snide comment would. Refusing to cave to her curiosity, Cassidy asked the _real_ question of the hour.

"What are you doing here, Kathryn?"

"Sebastian's out of town, and I thought I'd have some fun," Kathryn kept her tone deliberately light, but that didn't fool either of them. Cassidy smirked viciously as she watched the darker greens emerge in her cousin's eyes, the slight insecurities that were never allowed to show themselves revealed in the pools of emerald.

"Interesting. Who is he visiting?" Cassidy asked this as if it was a throwaway question of no real importance.

"Oh, just an old acquaintance. He hasn't seen them in a while, and thought he'd drop in," Kathryn skirted, trying to give off the illusion that she knew exactly what was going on, when she was really as questioning as the next person. Scanning the room as she spoke, her eyes fell upon a tall guy, with green eyes and a strikingly familiar mop of brown hair. "Cassidy, who is that?"

"That? Oh, that's Sean," Cassidy answered, smiling slightly.

"Thought so," Kathryn smirked, satisfied.

"Fucked him?" her cousin asked casually.

"Mmm-hmm," Kathryn mumbled in response.

"Any good?"

"Yeah, sure. Nothing earth-shattering, but he got the job done."

"Ooh look!" Cassidy cooed.

A short brunette had made her way over to Sean, a hopeful look upon her face. She coyly bit her lip, running a hand down his well-defined bicep. Kathryn smiled, remembering exactly what she loved about high school. Consistent gossip. They hadn't caught on until the very end that she and Sebastian were the gods controlling their world, that they were all pawns in her game. Every action had an equal and opposite reaction, and Kathryn liked nothing more than to watch the ripples in the water she had created. The girl's face fell in disappointment as Sean gestured towards an attractive brunette in the corner, shrugging apologetically before gently removing her hand.

"That girl's Rachel. She's… um…"

"A whore," Kathryn finished bluntly.

"Yes, but a rather wealthy one. Her dad owns something or other. We've met her before, I think."

"Yeah, I remember her now. God, she's an annoying little tramp."

"She's certainly lived up to that here at Prestridge. According to the sorority, she has a bit of a 'Guy of the Week' program going. So far, she's slept her way through most of our year. Sean's her biggest challenge yet, but he's just not interested," Cassidy shook her head in fake empathy, and the cousins shared a devious smirk.

"Who's that girl?" Kathryn asked, pointing with her electrifying eyes.

"In the corner? Oh, that's Katie."

"She's pretty," Kathryn remarked idly, swirling her drink around in her half-empty-or-half-full cup.

"Yes, most of the grade thinks so. Jason tried her before, but _she_ wasn't interested. But she and Sean are in **_loooove_**, or some bullshit like that," Cassidy rolled her eyes. Kathryn was on the verge of replying scathingly when her cell phone began to pulsate against her hip, the melody blaring from it lost among the noises of the club.

AUNT CAMILLA

The screen glared back at her, much the same way her uncle's wife did. Sighing exasperated, Kathryn backed into the dark corner of the club, signaling to Cassidy that she was on the phone.

"Hello?"

"Kathryn! Oh, thank God!"

"Hi Aunt Camilla. How are you?" Kathryn inquired in a chipper tone, while examining her nail polish.

"Something terrible has happened!" her aunt shrieked overdramatically. Kathryn's first instinct was to roll her eyes, but she could feel her heart plummeting into the pit of her stomach. An image of a sullen four year old popped into her mind, contrasting sharply with an image of bubbly, bouncing blonde at age three, and guilt began to set in as Kathryn realized that she hadn't seen this child in years.

"Is it Juliette? Is she back in the hospital? Camilla, what's going on?" Kathryn asked, her words pouring out in a nervous stream as she began to pace, the _click-click_ of her heels the only distinct sound in the corridor.

"No, she's not back in the hospital, sweetheart," Kathryn really did roll her eyes at this term of endearment that was so misplaced in their relationship. "Actually, that may not be true. I have no idea where she is! When I got home tonight, she was just gone! She packed her bags and left!"

_Much like uncle Alain has been trying to do, but you just don't seem to get the picture_, Kathryn sneered internally. Suddenly, everything clicked into place.

"Well, I'll let you know. I have a feeling she'll turn up soon. But I'll call grandmere, just in case," Kathryn simpered into the phone, wheels of thought turning at high speeds behind her green eyes. _He couldn't have…_

"Actually, you don't have to, Kathryn. I was just about to call Issy."

Flinching at the absurd nickname for her regard grandmother while suppressing a laugh that the thought of a call from Camilla would be received at Tromperie Manor, Kathryn stared in wonder at the phone. Her favorite uncle's bride had been part of the Merteuil family for years. A very detached part, trying to distance her clan from the legacy, but a part nonetheless. Yet she still seemed to be so oblivious about so many things. Particularly that _no one_ got away with calling Isabelle by a nickname.

Except Sebastian, Kathryn mused internally. Her blonde stepbrother never seemed to grasp the concept that full names were names too. While most people would cower until the intimidating gaze of a Merteuil woman, Sebastian welcomed the challenge. Somehow, he managed to charm each and every one of them, in varying degrees of course. He alone was immune to the impenetrable forces surrounding them, breaking down their barriers to the point where the majestic women became Belle, Kat, Cassie, and Jules or Julie. Right now, her young cousin got the privilege of _two _nicknames. If this musing were to be done aloud, the sarcasm would be evident. Yet with the way Juliette was maturing, she had a feeling she would drop the cutsie "ie" of her childhood. Kathryn Merteuil saw a lot of herself in Juliette, the sweet features and tiny voice lending themselves to a perfect cover for their true deeds. How the young beauty would turn out had been doubtful for a very long time, given her nearly-sainted mother. The first inkling that her powers would be used for evil, not so much good, was the immediate rapport she developed with Sebastian. Slightly jealous, Kathryn didn't really understand why she was so taken with a man who wasn't even part of her family, but Juliette adopted him as a sort of brother, and Kathryn began not to mind so much. It didn't really matter that Sebastian got more attention from her cousin. She didn't like children anyway.

Each woman, or child as their case was, _detested_ nicknames, and with good reason. Isabelle, Kathryn, Cassidy and Juliette Merteuil were names carrying great cache, held by women who were worthy of fear, respect, veneration… or would be one day. Yet not one of them seemed to be able to tell him no when he used one for them.

"No, don't worry about it, Camilla. I was about to call _grandmere _as it is, it won't be any trouble."

"You were about to call your grandmother?" her voice cooed back in disbelief, traces her of Midwestern accent drawling. "You sound like you're at a club."

"Hah. That's funny. Must be bad reception. I'll call her now, it won't be any trouble, don't go out of your way, Camilla."

"_Aunt _Camilla," she corrected absently.

The pleasant tone Kathryn had been forcing herself to use melted away quickly. A sneer curled her pretty lips as her face darkened ominously. It was one thing to be an insipid little twit, but quite another to patronize her. "Did you say something?"

"Oh, no, dear. Thanks for making the call for me, I'm late for a meeting at the Christian Group," Camilla hung up with not so much as a goodbye, recognizing the signs that she had tossed her volatile niece into hostile territory.

Rolling her eyes in irritation, Kathryn scanned the room again, keeping track of her cousin as she punched numbers into her cell phone. However, these numbers did not belong to her grandmother…

------------------

His expensive cell phone rang in his pocket, and had he a spare hand, he just might have answered it. However, with two entire trays full of food, Sebastian Valmont found himself otherwise occupied. Realizing this with a small grin he noted that this was probably the most work he'd ever _had_ to do in his life, as lifting weights was entirely by choice. Plopping the food down unceremoniously onto the sticky table, Sebastian wondered how the hell Juliette had convinced him to come to _Burger King_ of all places. A look down at her swinging feet, hanging feet above the ground as she spun happily on her stool answered his silent question.

"Yay! Did you get chicken?" she asked, clapping her hands excitedly.

"Of course I got chicken. You said anything except hamburger, and you look enough like a rabbit as it is, we don't need to give you salad," he teased, marveling again at how excited she got over the smallest things. With all that she had been through in her few short years, Juliette Merteuil had had most of the happiness and zest for life sucked out of her, and yet she still managed to concoct some enthusiasm for things as small as eating dinner with him at a dingy fast food restaurant along the highway.

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean? I don't look like a rabbit. I'm really pretty," Juliette shot back, narrowing her beautiful blue eyes. It was true, of course. With her long blonde curls, those deep cerulean eyes, porcelain skin with rosy cheeks, and tiny, fragile body, Juliette was an exceptionally beautiful child. But it always amused Sebastian that she never needed to hear it.

"Yes you are. You look like me, you know?"

"I know. That's why I picked you," Juliette said simply, biting the tip off her chicken nugget and chewing primly.

"Picked me?" he asked, biting into his own hamburger.

"Yeah. There are plenty of others guy in the world, but I think we make the best team. We're both really pretty. And you're pretty cool. We just get each other. Not just anybody would've come all the way from California to get me. And 'member when my heart failed?" her tone was light, as if she were discussing the weather or her haircut. Sebastian quirked an eyebrow, shocked that she thought _anybody_ could _forget _that night.

"Of course."

"Well, you were there in like a half hour! And Kathryn had said that you were really busy and might not be able to come at all, and I was really worried that I would die and I wouldn't see you ever again. But then you were there, and I was okay."

The way she said it was so simple, Sebastian could hardly comprehend it. She stated things in a way that made her opinion seem like fact, as if he could argue with her for the rest of their lives but she would still maintain the fact that he came and saved her. That would make for a sort of twisted irony, he mentally noted with a smile. Deep down, he thought that it had kind of been Juliette who saved him. There hadn't been much to his life. As Kathryn had so poignantly put it, "Introduce her to your world of sex, drugs, and…what else do you do?" Kathryn had been kidding, knowing that her own life was much the same, but he had a sad knowledge that there hadn't always been more. Then along came Juliette, and he had had someone to balance him out. Someone to teach him what unconditional love really was, love in its purest form. Anything he would ever feel for anyone else would always be tainted, by resentment or lust or greed, but a brief sort of redemption came for him in the form of the tiny girl. He knew, of course, that she hadn't "chosen" him, as she put it, because they had been tossed together from the very beginning. From the first time he held her after his step-aunt gave birth, Sebastian had known that this child was something special. Neither had actually chosen the other, but wouldn't it be pretty to think that God had chosen them for each other.

"You still hungry, Jules?" he asked, pointing with his eyes at the empty container of fries that she had virtually inhaled. Blushing slightly, she nodded. "Alright, I'll go get more," he heaved a long-suffering sigh, but grinned to let her know that he was kidding. He would gladly buy her the entire restaurant, greasy food and sticky counters and all, if it meant that she would finally gain some weight. She really was alarmingly skinny.

"One king sized fries, please," he ordered, and didn't notice until two minutes later that the new cashier who had replaced the elderly man they had had only a half-hour ago hadn't moved an inch. Instead, the teenage girl simply stared. Chuckling slightly, Sebastian could already tell where this was going. It was no new territory.

"Bon jour, je m'appelle Sarah," the girl smiled. Unaware if she was foreign or flirting, or perhaps both, Sebastian smiled charmingly.

"Sebastian."

"Vous parlez le français?" she cooed, delighted.

"Oui." _Obviously, you bleached blonde bitch._

"Voulez vous couchent avec moi, ce soir?" she batted her eyelashes. Sebastian bit down **hard** on his lower lip to keep from laughing. She had to be kidding. Even back in New York, where he had fucked pretty much everything with a pulse and a pussy, he had always tried to steer clear of fake blondes. This girl's hair was a color he couldn't even pin down, but it was a rather repulsive shade of orange, as if she had put too much Sun-In in dark hair, and bright blonde streaks. Even besides that, she seemed to have recently removed her nose ring, leaving a bright red hole in her right nostril that was actually making him kind of nauseous from looking at it for too long.

"Non, il fait ne pas, vous la vache stupide, » Juliette sidled up beside him. It was becoming harder and harder to keep a straight face, as the beautiful child told off the cashier, fluorescent lighting bouncing off curls the color that the employee may have been attempting with her dye. Juliette might not have needed to call her a stupid cow, but it couldn't hurt.

"Votre soeur?"

Sebastian opened his mouth to deny this when Juliette beat him to it. However, she took creative license in her response.

"Son enfant d'amour de illégitime, « Juliette smiled sweetly as the fast food worker's eyes widened in shock, looking back and forth between them rapidly and noting the physical similarities.

"C'est vrai?"

Sebastian shrugged helplessly as Sarah rushed about with a crimson blush staining her cheeks. She nearly threw the fries on the counter as she scampered into the kitchen. Once she was gone, Sebastian finally let out the peel of laughter he had been holding in. Swooping Juliette up and depositing her back onto her chair, they began to eat the fries they had just acquired, apparently free of charge.

"You don't think it was a little bit overkill to tell her you were my illegitimate love child?" he chuckled.

"Something told me that she wouldn't have bought it that I was your mistress," Juliette shrugged, her small pearly teeth demolishing the crispy fry.

The phone rang again, Sebastian's large hand sliding promptly into his pocket to retrieve it this time.

KATHRYN.

"Valmont," he said into the phone.

"Valmont, did you fucking kidnap my cousin?" Kathryn's voice demanded, reception crackling her tone but doing nothing to disguise the partial anger and part curiosity that composed it.

"Kidnapping is too strong a word. I think we prefer that I helped her run away. What do you think, Jules?"

"Assisted run away," Juliette nodded firmly.

"Where the fuck are you, Sebastian?"

"Burger King," he grimaced, and Kathryn laughed, just imagining the look on his face as he admitted that.

"_Burger King_? How did she sucker you into that one?" she laughed.

"You should see her, Kat. She's so skinny."

"Well, did you make her eat?" she demanded, concern leaking through her icy tone. Sebastian smiled, knowing that Kathryn didn't hate children nearly as much as she claimed. At least, not this particular one. Blood is thicker than water, and it runs deep within.

"Of course. That's what I'm doing in a fucking Burger King!"

"When are you coming back?" insecurity edged its way into her tone this time.

"Soon. Tonight, probably. Tomorrow at the latest. We'll be there in the morning, Kat."

"Alright, well, try not to get yourselves killed."

"Aww, it sounds like somebody cares," Sebastian teased, Juliette's giggle in the background.

"Wow, your reception must _really_ suck," Kathryn spat back.

"Aright, I'll see you at the hotel," Sebastian said.

"Call me later?"

"Okay," he snapped the phone shut with a slight smile brightening his features.

"You two definitely need to get back together," Juliette shook her head condescendingly. And then her somber air was shattered when she threw a fry at him.

------------------

"Cassidy? This is Annette."

Cassidy could vaguely hear Patrick's weasely voice over the blaring music and was planning on ignoring it completely. However, there was something about that name that made her entire body tense. Snapping her head around, her deep brown curls flew as her eyes locked with a pair of soft blue ones. They contained hurt and fear and excitement and vulnerability, and Cassidy would recognize that look anywhere. She herself had worn it once, long ago.

"Annette. Nice to met you," she drawled, a bright smile across her face that never quite reached her eyes as she extended her bony wrist to shake hands with the slightly plumper blonde.

"Hi Cassidy."

"You two live in the same dorm, if I'm not mistaken."

"Tourvel?" Cassidy questioned, her eyebrows raised. Hopefully not the newly vacated dorm below her. If so, there was always the chance that she had heard her slight nuclear meltdown the other day, and that could always lead to some awkward moments. However, Annette's smile remained pleasant as she nodded shyly.

"Patrick's told me so much about you," Annette gushed, a slight bit of hero worship alighting her pretty face. _Oh? _

"Did he? All good, I hope," she smiled. At times, Cassidy Merteuil's smile was a double-edged sword. You could read into it what you wanted, be it happiness or a polite air, but it could always take on a meaning of its own. It was truly astounding, how many things could be read from it. At this very moment, Annette Hargrove saw a kind smile radiating warmth, while Patrick Bale read a predatory gleam among her pearly whites, a signal of danger, a disguised warning.

"Oh, of course. I could really see us being friends," Annette said hopefully. Something unidentifiable flashed in Cassidy's light eyes for a moment. _Friends_? Not quite.

"I would love that!" Cassidy squealed uncharacteristically. It was actually a little embarrassing for her, but as she saw the relief that washed over Annette's face as she did, she knew that it would all be worth it. The enemy of mine enemy is my friend.

As Annette and Patrick departed, Annette promising to call her the next day, Cassidy smiled. This time, there was no misinterpreting her meaning. As her large calculating eyes took in Kathryn on the dance floor with Jason, a real smile upon her cousin's face, and Annette hand in hand with Patrick, Cassidy realized that she wasn't quite sure how, but all her half-formed plans were falling into place, indirectly as it seemed. Kathryn and Jason seemed to be making their way towards the door, something the curly haired brunette found _very _intriguing. She couldn't help but laugh a little as Kathryn passed Desmond leaning against the bar, _accidentally _kicking him **hard** in the shins. Kathryn and Jason giggled as they walked past the muscular boy hunched over in pain, as Annette and Patrick slow danced closely in the middle of the floor, her looking only slightly uneasy.

There was just one guy missing, but she had a feeling he'd be harder to crack than the rest.

------------------

_Hey guys. I'm completely aware that this chapter may very well be the suckiest thing in the entire universe, but I was very interrupted while writing it. Namely because I'm sick as hell. _

_Okay, this chapter was called "Vent", but not for the reason you might think lol. The fictional characters here aren't quite fictional. Desmond and Sarah are both people I know. Similarly, they are both people I despise. Lol. And Rachel… haha, Katie, that's all on you. So yes, it's true—I do horrible things to people I don't like in my fictional universe. _

_**Kerimack**: Welcome back to the land of the living! You have been **sorely** missed! Lol. While you've been gone, I've been practicing how not to be an embarrassingly gushing fan, so I'm going to attempt that now. But for the record, you nearly gave me a heart attack when I saw that the review was from you lol. I'm glad that you like my extended Merteuil family tree, and that you picked up that it was inspired by Jason's line in CI3. I was beyond flattered when you said that I inspired you and got you re-interested. Trust me, it's usually the other way around. Haha. _

_**Ocfan108**- I don't think you'll have to worry about a few chapters in a row being about Annette. I find writing her to be a very painful experience. Lol. Notice that she hasn't gotten a full chapter to herself thus far, so that probably won't change lol. I'm glad that you loved Juliette, but don't worry about possibly liking her more than Kathryn—Katie and I do. Hahahah_

_**Luvs-bitch01**- Hehe, you did notice that. Yes, she's quite the combination of Kathryn and Sebastian. I'm like giddy over the fact that everybody loves Juliette._

_**y-x**- No, Juliette's escaped relatively uninfluenced by her Snow White mother. Isn't her mom annoying? But there will be evidence of that coming up later on… muah ha ha! For some reason, I'm not surprised that classical music inspired AIE lol. You'll **never** guess what I'm listening to as I wrote this. _

_**Katie**- So far so good on the Juliette front. But we should probably start concocting painful fictional deaths for people… just in case. Lol thanks for your help when I was coming up with ideas for this chapter. Hope you liked the Rachel/Sean/YOU! Cameo in there lol._

_I'm so sorry that I kept you guys waiting on this one. You can thank y-x that this is in existence at all lol. I'd love to reply to all of you individually, but my head is starting to spin lol. So I'm going to go back to sleep now, but thanks for reviewing guys! I love you! Lol. Please review and let me know what you thought of this chapter. Thanks for reading. _

_Xo Sam_

_P.S. Yes, I know, I pretty much have a new one-shot per chapter of this story lol. But **please **go check out "Barely Breathing". It's my first CI songfic, I believe. I'm rather fond of it lol. And also to remind you that "Fade to Black" is a sort of prequel to this story, so anybody who wants a better understanding of this Kathryn should definitely go check it out. And now it's lay-down time for me... _


	15. A Place To Call Home

_Aww, you guys! I love y'all **a lot**, you know that? _

**Breaking the Broken**

_Fifteen_

A Place To Call Home

------------------

_  
Pushing forward and arching back  
Bring me closer to heart attack  
Say goodbye and just fly away  
When you come back  
I have some things to say _

How does it feel to know you never have to be alone  
When you get home?

Maroon 5

------------------

_It is not true that suffering ennobles the character; happiness does that sometimes, but suffering for the most part, makes men petty and vindictive._

Somerset Maugham

------------------

"So let me get this straight—you got Jason to stay the night without even putting out?" her incredulous tone carried throughout the elegant parlor. The dainty tinkling of china accompanied it, and the sunlight streaming warmly through the bay windows illuminating the deep mahogany paneling and pristine floor in an uncharacteristically warm way. Though all other tables were placed many feet away, as is the custom to protect those who could actually afford to take tea in the room, all eyes were on this table.

"That's what I said," Kathryn stated, a triumphant smirk curling her lips as she swirled her tiny spoon amongst the liquid in her china cup. Sliding it out, tapping it lightly three times on the edge, turning it over and laying it on the saucer had been a habit Kathryn maintained since childhood. It always made Cassidy wonder if she was OCD. It would really explain a lot.

"You shouldn't be sleeping with him anyway. EW!" Juliette chirped, feet swinging happily below her, a foot off the ground. Her tiny finger played with a curl, wounding it tighter and tighter before letting go and watching it spring. This time, she tugged the golden loop for emphasis on the EW, her big blue eyes widening as she winced in slight pain. She would have to find a new way to make her point.

Kathryn glanced over at Cassidy and found that her confused expression mirrored her own.

"What's gross about that?" Cassidy asked tentatively.

"**_Jason's_** gross. He's a boy!" her pert nose wrinkled in disgust.

"And what's Sebastian?" Kathryn asked in amusement, wondering how the slick six year old would talk circles of this one.

"Sebastian's not a boy!" Juliette laughed.

"Ohh, Sebastian's all boy," Cassidy muttered knowingly, the whisper carrying across the table, her smirk hidden by the tea cup as she raised it to her lips. The faintest sneer passed over Kathryn's features before turning her attention to the younger of the cousins.

"So Juliette, how was your trip?"

The young girl's mouth opened to respond before a ringing was heard. Grinning happily, Juliette slid open the zipper on her Coach scribbles bag and withdrew a brand new cell phone. Flipping it open excitedly, she deflated only slightly when she heard who was on the other end.

"Not happy to talk to me, Jules?"

"No, it's just that I was hoping it was someone else."

"Who else would be calling this number?" Sebastian laughed, and both Kathryn and Cassidy's heads shot up from their glasses at the audible sound.

"Peter Pan?" Juliette shrugged.

"Since when does she have a cell phone?" Cassidy mouthed, incredulousness written in her eyes. Each of the Merteuil children had been spoiled beyond most other's wildest dreams, but a cell phone at six was pushing it.

Kathryn shook her head and shrugged, whispering, "No clue, but it's obviously new. Her mom doesn't even have the number. Camilla was calling me all night, looking for her." Cassidy made a sympathetic face, the

"Does he call you often?" Sebastian's amused voice came through the airwaves.

"No, but there's a first time for everything."

"What are you doing?" he asked. Most people would be appalled at the fact that the six year old in his care was wandering about and he had no idea where he was. He had the vaguest clue, that she was with Kathryn, but that could possibly be scarier. They had literally pulled into the hotel driveway at ten o'clock that morning, and the petite beauty swooped in, whisking her young cousin away for 'bonding time'. Sebastian was too frightened at the concept to ask for further details.

"Having tea with Cassidy and Kathryn," she said, taking a dainty bite out of her biscuit.

"Humm… any good gossip?"

"Well, my mom is looking for me, but the doctor upped her meds, so she may forget I'm gone for another week or so. Grandmere has a new boyfriend. Oh, there was a big party while we were gone. Cassidy almost got raped and Kathryn got Jason to stay the night. There's a new episode of Desperate Housewives," Juliette babbled, her pale forehead crinkling adorably as she tried to recall details of the conversation.

The tension was palpable around the round table as the elder cousins' eyes grew to the size of the tea saucers in their hands. It was one of the Merteuil Commandments, the unwritten rules that were embedded not in words but in genes, that things of this nature were never to be repeated.

Cassidy could feel a great internal struggle. Part of her shriveled with embarrassment, cowered deeper inside at the image of weakness this seemed to portray. The other half, however, couldn't deny its delight at the deer-in-the-headlights expression Kathryn had taken on, dying to learn of the next twist in the never ending Kathryn-and-Sebastian-Saga. All was hidden behind an impassive expression, gesturing slightly for a refill.

"Well, that certainly is news," his masculine voice rang through, distinctly colder. Kathryn leaned back in her chair, but her posture didn't relax in the slightest, and faint lines of anxiousness lined her forehead. Cassidy also slumped in her chair, but with an amused smile alighting her own pretty face. Juliette slouched because everyone else seemed to be doing so, clutching the phone tightly to her ear. She was six years old, but certainly not an idiot, and it was obvious that Sebastian was upset.

"When I get back, can we go mini-golfing?" Juliette asked hesitantly, but none of them were sure why. The child had never been denied anything in her life, whether it was the Sweet Sixteen party she had had for her fifth birthday because she saw one on television and thought she'd like one, or the llama she had fallen in love with at the zoo. She named him Lorenzo, but quickly decided that she was much fonder of horses.

"Julie, no. You hate mini-golfing," Sebastian whined, the role reversal between the two evident.

"_Fine_. Can we go to the movies?" she frowned.

"Sure," he sighed distractedly. He mumbled something else that rang through all too clearly to Juliette, and she raised her golden eyebrows at his request.

"You want me to tell Kathryn **_what_**?" her innocent eyes got round. But they weren't, not really. An innocence that a child has the right to be born into was scarred by the past, the sins of the father embedding themselves. Original sin and all that, if you were religious, which none of the Merteuils actually were but all pretended to be devoutly. Kathryn looked closely; eyes zeroing in the way that only hers seemed to, noticing the similarities between this child and the boy she had adopted as kin. Both were full of mystery, containing a wide-eyed kind of innocence that was betrayed by the darker lines, shifting in shades and intentions. Presently, they were light and surprised, amused and cautious.

"Okay, I'll do that. I'll meet you outside. Love you too, Sebastian," Juliette snapped the phone shut with a wide smile on her face. Oblivious to the curious stares, Juliette hummed quietly to herself while rummaging through her purse.

"Juliette?" Kathryn asked pointedly.

"Hmm?" she asked, eyes darting upwards.

"Didn't Sebastian give you a message for me?" she prompted. Kathryn could feel Cassidy shift in her seat; saw her lean indiscernibly closer to Juliette. She would laugh at how desperate she was to hear what was being said, if she weren't doing the exact same thing.

Brow furrowed slightly, Juliette appeared to be in deep thought as both her cousins waited anxiously to hear what Sebastian said. Suddenly her face lit up, and she delivered the message proudly. "Sebastian said not to bother washing the sheets this time. He's not sleeping there tonight."

She stayed mercifully silent through Juliette's departure, a hug and a kiss on each cheek for both cousins before she gleefully skipped away, but Kathryn knew that look. She had lived with it all these years, familiarizing herself with the triumphant glow in her light brown eyes, the shallow dimple forming though there was no trace of a smile. Kathryn had dedicated her life to giving Cassidy as few opportunities to make this face as possible.

"Looks like it'll be a little harder to convince _him_ to stay the night."

------------------

It was in a weird sort of daze in which Jason Argyle found his way back to the dorm room, far too early in the morning for his taste. That is to say, the sun was up. It was like a hangover without a headache, fumbling blindly in the real world while existing on a plane all your own. The night had marked an important landmark in Jason's life—the first time he'd spent the night with a girl.

Of course, his reputation precedes him. It certainly wasn't his "first time", but he had never been even remotely tempted to fall asleep in someone else's arms. Perhaps that would've been different with Cassidy, the object of his lust and admiration for a long time now, but their only encounter had been in a dark alleyway, and it wasn't exactly ideal conditions for cuddling. Not that that was something Cassidy would do, anyway, and honestly, it wasn't Kathryn's style either. He wasn't sure how the beautiful brunette had tricked him into a feeling a level of intimacy with her, but he was more than willing to go through the experience again.

At first, Jason had had a weird vibe about the massive hotel room, as if Sebastian Valmont were lurking in every shadowy corner. And it was true, to a certain degree. His suits were in the closet, expensive designer shoes strewn about on the floor. The suite, in fact, seemed less like a hotel suite and more like a vast apartment. You could never go so far as to say it was 'homey', because even back in Manhattan, the Valmont townhouse was far from a loving and warm environment, and that _was_ their home. None of that took away the distinctly male scent on the sheets, or the framed picture of the two of them in all their splendor, perched on the night table. However, when entwined with Kathryn Merteuil, that seemed to matter so much less.

"Dude, was that _the_ Kathryn that I saw you with last night? Sebastian's Kathryn?" Patrick asked, excitement etched into his features. Jason frowned. It seemed so much different when put like that. Suddenly it dawned on him why that had felt so weird, being in her hotel room. It was the familiar feeling of hooking up with a taken girl. Not that that had ever stopped him before.

"Yep," he stated simply, rolling over and wishing to finally get some sleep. He had stayed up most of the night before, even after he and Kathryn had retired to her room. Jason lay awake watching her, wondering if she knew just how beautiful she was.

_Probably_.

Now he wondered vaguely if she knew the suffering it caused him to be apart from her. She had shooed him out quickly that morning, leaving only minutes after he did, saying something was **_really_** important that she needed to do. He wanted to _know _her, he truly did. There was something in her eyes that made him think there was something really good, really interesting about her that made her worth it. Lost in his own thoughts, not for the first time, Jason found himself lost in a conversation with his roommate Patrick Bale.

"So that Annette chick was your date last night, right?" he asked slowly, blinking his eyes as if he had never seen sunlight before.

"Yes," Patrick answered with a smug smile, all irritation at being ignored dissipating at discussion of his small victory.

"Fuck her yet?" Jason cut to the quick of it.

"Of course not, you asshole. She proclaimed her virginity in a teen magazine; do **_you_** think she puts out on first date?"

"Is she warming up to you yet, because it appeared that she thought you were a psychotic stalker before? Not that that characterization is too far off…" Jason replied scathingly.

"She'll be mine in no time. Although, I'm not sure you've got the right to pass judgment on this one Jase, since you're too chicken shit to try in the first place," Patrick remarked mildly, a challenge gleaming in his eyes.

"Excuse me?" Jason retorted, sitting up on the bed. "Are you saying that you could get into this girl's pants and I couldn't?"

"Your words, not mine," Patrick held up his hands.

"That's pathetic, man. You and I both know that I could get this girl to give it up in a heartbeat." Jason's fierce pride was kicking in, and Patrick was working it to his advantage, supremely enjoying the godlike feeling he got from manipulating others, even his so-called friends. Patrick Bale had never felt a particular sense of loyalty towards any of these people. After all, friends are just enemies who don't have the guts to kill you, he'd always said.

"Care to make a wager on that?" Patrick taunted.

Jason froze suddenly, mouth open in mid-reply. He could vaguely see the trap he could easily be falling into. Patrick could almost taste the victory, and it was just as Cassidy had described it when she'd come over in the wee hours of the morning, with a wicked plot forming in her pretty little head. He had to admit that he was skeptical that she would be willing to bury the hatchet, but she had insisted with a manic gleam in her eyes that there were bigger fish to fry, and he didn't really give a fuck either way. It was better to have her as a 'friend' than foe, an ally if nothing else.

"I'll think about it," he replied with a forced nonchalance, but as with so many others, his eyes were his downfall. It was blatantly obvious that there was never a challenge Jason Argyle could turn down. It was a childhood trait that he had never outgrown, one that his mother had always jested would be the end of him.

Well, that's the plan.

------------------

"Okay, Jules, I want you to wait here, okay? Don't move from the lobby, okay?" he asked, and Juliette nodded solemnly, plopping herself down on the overstuffed sofa as she watched Sebastian disappear through the rotating glass doors.

His foot stomped down, the Jaguar accelerating quickly as the darkened streets flew by. After spending the day doing whatever sight-seeing activities Juliette could think of, Sebastian had pumped her for details of Kathryn and Cassidy's conversation over tea. Those are the details that made his blood run cold, that chilled him deep within, that were the purpose for this late night ride.

Checking the address Blaine had provided him with only moments before, he strode purposefully up the pathway to the small off-campus house that was supposedly shared by three other roommates, trench coat trailing ominously behind him. Two brisk knocks on the peeling red door, and only a moment passed before it was answered. His bright, angry eyes met a pair of dark ones. The other man's face was obscured by a large bandage covering his nose, and Sebastian had more than a feeling that this was him, and felt a bizarre surge of pride at how well she had held her own.

"Desmond?" he inquired politely. The other boy nodded with a grin, as if being this person was some huge accomplishment.

"Oh. It's nice to meet you," Sebastian smiled deceptively, before promptly driving a fist into the taller boy's gut. Delivering another punch to his jaw, the muscular black man lay sprawled across his own doorway with no hope of defending himself. Sebastian took a perverse pleasure in that, the knowledge that the cocky asshole lying on the ground now knew how it felt. Casting a disgusted glance at the prone figure, he ignored the whimpers and protests of the boy, hissing "You make me sick," before all but disappearing into the darkness.

At the convertible roared back towards the hotel at high speeds, Sebastian mentally urged it to go faster. Not because he was afraid of the consequences of his actions, of course, as anyone with even the smallest fraction of rational thought would know better. He just wanted to get back to Juliette. Knowing now that there were people in the world who _depended_ on him, that there was a little girl who would sit in a hotel lobby all night just because he asked her not to leave, was both comforting and frightening.

"That was fast," Juliette remarked mildly, a knowing air about her as he flew in through the same door he had exited from. Glancing suspiciously at the child, Sebastian wondered exactly how much she knew. It wasn't the first time his thoughts had wandered down this path. If it were anyone else, he would be alarmed at how in tune they were with his thought pattern, but not Juliette. It was Kathryn he would have to worry about.

Just the thought of his stepsister made his fists clench in anger, and even worse, he couldn't quite figure out why. Sebastian knew that Kathryn was far from celibate, and it's not like they had the relationship Juliette kept insisting that they did—they were both _allowed_ to fuck other people. But there was something about Jason that irked him, and the thought of Jason and Kathryn bothered him more than he would ever care to admit.

His own thoughts provided him no relief from the way Kathryn seemed to overwhelm him completely, and he found that as the elevator doors slid open on their floor, she was waiting for him. Sighing, Sebastian had Juliette's hand tightly clenched in his own, a new room key digging painfully into the other.

"Can I talk to you?" Kathryn asked quietly, smoothing down the fluffy white hotel robe in a subtle display of how awkward she truly felt in this scenario.

"I suppose so," he heaved a sigh, handing the key to Juliette, who promptly disappeared into the new hotel room, knowing where she was wanted.

"You need to come back," Kathryn said, her voice hoarse.

"I'm right here," Sebastian said, a bit of a sneer evident in his own voice.

"You need to… you need to stay in the room," she swallowed, both her words and her pride, as she stood before him in the deserted corridor.

"Why?" his brow furrowed, genuinely curious at this turn of events.

"Because you need to be there when I get home. We _are_ each other's home, you know? It's not fair Sebastian, you can't keep leaving. You left last time; you don't get to do it again. I can't _be_ alone." His intense gaze seemed to prod her on, unwavering in its quest for her real meaning.

"I didn't actually sleep with Jason, if that's what this is about."

"_Goodie_. Thank God for small favors. Jesus Kathryn, at least when I fuck random people in this hotel, I don't do so on surfaces you use regularly."

"I don't know Sebastian, I do occasionally need the elevator. And the couches in the lobby. The pool-side changing room…" she mused bitingly.

"Touché," he smirked, and she responded in kind.

"Where's Juliette going to sleep?"

"Juliette'll sleep on the couch. She really likes them," her golden blonde head poked out into the hallway, sleepiness evident in her eyes, her six year old body looking just about ready to collapse right there. "So… can we, 'Bastian? Can we stay with Kathryn? **_Please_**?"

"Alright, let's go, skinny girl," he scooped her into his arms, heading down the hallway with Kathryn by his side, turning and _just_ missing the relieved smile that washed across her beautiful features.

It was an interesting sight to Mrs. Jacobs, as she headed back to her hotel room with a large bucket of ice. Her heart went out to them. It must have been difficult to have a child at such a young age, she thought, they still looked like children themselves! Natalie Jacobs had married her husband Charlie at 18, she knew all about the ups and downs of young love. They had been married for thirty two years in August. It had been a long and bumpy road, child being entirely different paths on their own. They had conquered business trips and soccer games, and even the infidelity that threatened to destroy them forever. Even when they had been at their worst, and Natalie had wanted nothing more than to leave, she realized that there was nowhere to go. She couldn't go home, because he _was _her home. Natalie Jacobs went to sleep happy that night, knowing that the young couple had learned that lesson so much earlier than she did.

------------------

_Drum roll please… okay guys, how was it? I'm not sure how that turned out, so **please** review and let me know. Yes, Desmond made another appearance, but I'm pretty sure it'll be his last. I just couldn't resist that final insult. Thanks for all your kind words guys. You made me feel a whole lot better._

_**Luvs-bitch01-** I'm really glad that you like the Kathryn/Cassidy bond in this story. It's very tricky to write, and I think you're the only one who appreciates it lol. We've definitely got the same sense of humor._

_**xjn**- I'm glad that you liked Juliette! Personally, I adore her lol. You'll definitely see some Kathryn/Juliette interaction in the coming chapters. Just for future reference: gushing is **totally** acceptable. Hahah._

_**Ocfan08- **Your review made me very proud of myself. I'm totally the first person to mention Burger King in a Cruel Intentions story hahaha. That girl who tried flirting with Sebastian is actually this whore from one of my classes that I absolutely despise… You certainly have a lot of faith in Kathryn. You should hope, for her sake, she doesn't align herself with the wrong side lol._

_**Katie**- oh, Katie, Katie, Katie. I'm glad that last chapter helped you out. I hope your best friend stops being such a whore. Let me know if you need her trashed further. Hahaha_

_**Y-x**- Sad, but true. Flattery gets you everywhere with me lol. _

_**Kerimack**- Aw, you're so nice. You're comment made me feel much better, in case you're curious lol. I'm glad that you're coming over to the side of people who love Juliette. I knew you didn't really hate kids. Muah ha ha. Lol. And Desmond? Yes, very shitty actions on his part. So much so that he's been written into two chapters, and got the shit beat out of him in each. Wow… now I'm starting to feel like I've got issues... lol… _

_Okay guys, so I actually already started a little bit of the next chapter. It's up to you to prompt me to go faster lol. Please review and let me know what you thought. Thanks for reading!_

_Xo Sam_

_I have a new story out. It's called "The Birds", and I've rarely been so self-conscious about a story in my life. So **please**_ _check that out and leave a review. _


	16. Scars of the Suffering

**Breaking the Broken**

_Sixteen_

Scars of the Suffering

_The world is full of suffering. Birth is suffering, decrepitude is suffering, sickness and death are sufferings. To face a man of hatred is suffering, to be separated from a beloved one is suffering, to be vainly struggling to satisfy one's own needs is suffering. In fact, life that is not free from desire and passion is always involved with suffering. _

Buddha (B.C. 568-488)

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Suffering takes many forms, and lives in the hearts of even the happiest of men. However not many live with the physical day to day agony, the kind that washed over the frail form of Juliette Merteuil with shocking regularity. Deep throated coughs wracked her frame in the wee hours of the morning, strangling the breath from her tiny body, and leaving all around her with the fear that it would be for the last time. It was a trait she spun to her advantage most of the time, her birthright indicating that it was something she could do, her blood demanding it. Yet every once in a while, it was this same blood that would spurt out through her pale pink lips, shocking even her and warranting visit after visit to the hospital to the point where there was a room reserved strictly for the young Merteuil.

This morning, the moonlight illuminating the suite found the girl's luxurious blonde curls spread across the lap of a WASPish girl, no older than twenty. Her tiny hand would jut out in a sort of awkward way, smoothing the young child's hair and rubbing her back in an affectionate way that didn't seem to fit her quite right. The grateful glimmer in the younger girl's bright blue eyes let her know that she appreciated the thought behind it, seeing right through her actions and deciphering her intentions in a glance. As Juliette drifted off to sleep, another few restless hours in which the girl would toss and turn, boxing her fears that she would never dare voice, the elder girl made her way back to the bedroom, opening the door without a sound. Ignoring the vast space provided by the king sized bed, she slid in beside a blond boy. Even subconsciously, he was attune to her, rolling over to spoon himself against her, sighing slightly into her glossy brown hair. Kathryn Merteuil knew well, as she stared at her stepbrother's sleeping form, that there were so many other ways to suffer. Being so close and yet so far to someone you love might even be worse.

Not far from the hotel, but in a world that seemed all its own, Jason Argyle meandered his way back to his dorm room. Still coming down from the high he had experienced that night, from both drugs and a certain three-some with some of Prestridge's sluttiest co-eds, the path he walked wasn't exactly a straight line, but that term was relevant for many aspects of his life. Jason found himself physically unable to live straight-edge, always meandering into the gray areas occupied by sex and drugs and games. Still powerless to wipe the cocky smirk from his face, it slid away of its own accord as his eyes wandered to a second story window. Staring out at him, impassive as always, stood Cassidy Merteuil in all her splendor. Her white satin robe hung limply over her gaunt shoulders, the security lights of the building casting a luminous glow about her form, a heavenly creature in her own right. Exiting her balcony without a second glance at the boy she had come to trust, Cassidy tucked herself into bed that night knowing well that there were many ways to suffer, but betrayal stung deep, a wound salting itself over and over again. There were many ways to suffer, and she intended him to feel many of them.

One floor down, but worlds away, a beautiful blonde rocked gently in her chair. The moon provided her with her only company as she hummed softly to herself, clutching to her chest an expensive leather-bound book. A single tear made its path from her pretty blue eyes down to her chin, and she congratulated herself. She was making a lot of progress this way, for all nights before this had been accompanied by more sobs than she could count. A fire roared welcomingly in the hearth, pointedly out of season, as the flames heated the room and flushed her cheeks.

"He's no you, but Patrick seems really nice," she whispered to the dark corners of the room, the shadows where she hoped his spirit might be lurking. That would contain a certain brand of irony, coupled with the way his soul was shrouded in secrecy, a fog of disillusion, when he was alive.

"I just… I feel like maybe it's time for me to try and live again…" her voice was thick with tears as her hand lashed out at them. "But I don't want to… not when you _can't_…"

Kneeling on the hardwood floor, she could feel the grains imprinting themselves in the smooth skin as she tremblingly held out the book. It was now or never, this one moment in which she could set aside her past and try to build up from the ashes. By ridding herself of this book, she could begin a new chapter. But by doing so, she would be not only closing the book on unimaginable pain but on the first great love of her life. Tossing it away would provide her the opportunity to have _another_ great love, but maybe just that one would be enough for her. Whipping open the cover in a desperate search for answers, her hunt was fruitless for the most part until she fell upon a picture of herself. Her and him. It was in here, towards the back, and reminded her of everything she had loved, and lost. Loved and lost **_him_**. She would keep this book, keep this chapter of her life, keep this wound gaping wide open if only to remember that moment clearly.

Unpolished fingernails racked through the pages, finding their new destination in a page located very much towards the front. Clawing a single page out of the book, the dwindling embers of the fire stoked at its contact with the paper. As flames licked the hauntingly beautiful likeness of Kathryn Merteuil, the blonde thought maybe she could finally get some sleep tonight. Annette Hargrove could tell you from experience that few things were as painful as suffering the loss of someone you loved, with no hope of them returning to you. It would be even more painful should the pretty girl know that the boy she had shed so many tears over lie sleeping peacefully in a luxury suite only miles away, intertwined with the girl she hated more than anything. But Annette had suffered enough for one night, and so the universe would not reveal its venomous secrets to her just yet. But the world we live in only protects its own for so long.

--------------------

She had often wondered why the hell she put up with Lucy Kensington. The redhead was tiny and ill-tempered, a gigantic stereotype. Even worse, she was nosy as hell, and Cassidy Merteuil found herself regretting the friendship they had maintained during their years at Prestridge _deeply_. After an hour of being pumped for information as to what really went down at the club, Lucy chattered on.

"Wouldn't it be funny if you and Jason hooked up?" she laughed, seemingly at random. Cassidy wheeled about, noticing the tall, dark and handsome boy lurking about the courtyard and rolled her eyes.

"Not as funny as it would be if you fell into an open sewer and died," Cassidy replied with a large grin bearing all her teeth, eyebrow arched at the uncovered manhole in the street. Lucy laughed nervously, inching farther away from it as they continued to walk.

"The funny part is, I don't know whether you're kidding or not," the redhead frowned. Cassidy noted, with tiny frown lines marring her forehead, that she wasn't sure either.

"Oh my gosh, I totally forgot to mention why I was asking you about the club in the first place!" Lucy squealed, typical of her Valley Girl upbringing. It was all Cassidy could do not to roll her eyes, and as soon as Lucy's back was turned, she did so anyway.

There were certain lengths that all must go through to preserve a friendship. Sometimes that meant laughter and bonding, and sometimes it was a constant struggle to keep from pushing others away. Friendship was a length that Cassidy Merteuil suffered through, a means to justify an end. As Lucy delivered her next words, that end crashed all around her, a thousand new beginning born in the moment where the one had died.

"That Desmond guy? Apparently his roommates found him with the shit beat out of him. They said it was some blonde guy with a hot car. Isn't that hot?" Lucy chirped, eyes shining in delight at having the scoop on all the comings and goings about the campus, and Cassidy was instantly reminded of _exactly_ why the hell she put up with Lucy Kensington.

--------------------

Food had always been an enemy to Kathryn Merteuil, her constant struggle to be the best extending further than anyone would have imagined. While still in the preteen ages, she and Cassidy had hit what would be their awkward stages together. Both had always been naturally thin, but it was no longer enough. Kathryn needed to be thinn**_er_** than Cassidy. The lines between them were blurred now, friends and enemies, family and foes, but their rivalry had developed long before their mutual attractions to Sebastian Valmont.

The petite brunette could remember the time, so long ago, when she had first recognized food as her adversary. Yes, an even larger one than Cassidy was proving to be. She had suffered in silence for years, swallowing the outraged response of her body, forcing down the rebellion of her stomach. 'Beauty is pain,' her own mother had slurred often, usually when she caught someone popping painkillers after yet another face lift. Tiffani Merteuil had never been equipped to deal with pain, not the way that Kathryn was. Now, as she sat across the glass table in the suite's small kitchen from her cousin, she wondered how she had ever fallen into that destructive cycle.

The six year old shoveled food into her mouth as if it were the last meal she would ever eat. The ominous thought circled around Kathryn until she was thoroughly perturbed and completely relishing the sight of Juliette, in good health, eating mountains of bacon. The beauty marveled at the young girl's ability to thoroughly enjoy eating, without sparing a thought to the calories that made their way down her raw throat. Although, she cast an appraised glance, calories might be good for the stick thin girl.

"'Ant da 'uff'n?" Juliette swallowed, cleared her throat, and repeated her question. "Want a muffin?"

"No thanks, Juliette. How are you feeling today?" Kathryn asked, skirting to a degree the fact that she had held the shaking girl during the rare hours Sebastian dozed off this morning, trying to coax her into a state peaceful enough for her to sleep. If this were Cassidy, or Isabelle, or any of the Merteuils for that matter, the question would be avoided completely. Signs of human weakness routinely had a blind eye turned towards them. However, Juliette was not like the rest of them. Perhaps she had just spent too much time with Valmont, but there was a blunt truth in the air about her that signified that she really didn't give a damn about what was proper and what wasn't. Good breeding couldn't counter instinct.

"Better. Did you sleep well?" she inquired politely.

"Yes, I did," smiled Kathryn.

"That's because Sebastian was there," Juliette grinned triumphantly. Kathryn rolled her eyes but didn't bother with a scathing reply. There was no beating this child. A gift bestowed on her at birth, Juliette Merteuil, when she wasn't winning an argument, would merely talk circles around you until you were so dizzy you couldn't see your original point. It was far too early in the morning for that kind of confusion.

"Speaking of… where is Sebastian?" Juliette asked, brow furrowing slightly as she realized what had been blatantly obvious for the last half hour. Kathryn smiled faintly, memories swirling of a groggy goodbye an hour earlier, a tender kiss placed to her forehead followed by the quiet CLICK of the door locking. When Kathryn had awoken, for real this time, she had rolled over to regain the warmth she had been missing dearly, only to fall into cold space. Feeling a crinkling below her, she retrieved a note from Sebastian in the place where he had slept.

_Morning Kat,_

_I do know how you detest waking up early, so I thought I'd leave you this note instead. I already ordered breakfast to be delivered. Julie's probably going to be starving, and the girl can eat like nobody's business. They should also deliver those scones that you like, so I hope you'll eat at least one of them. And digest it. I'll be home before you know it. _

_Sebastian_

She had grinned at just how well he seemed to know her and Juliette. Better than they knew themselves, it seemed. It was bizarre that he should retain such details about two girls he hadn't seen in so long, especially because Sebastian was someone widely viewed as self-centered. But he wasn't, not really. He just liked to pretend he didn't care.

"Sebastian went out early this morning. Probably for a walk," Kathryn explained, guiltily taking a tiny bit out of the scone as she recalled the letter.

"Why didn't he wait for us? We'd have walked with him," Juliette protested, and both were immediately stricken by a vision of the three of them walking together in the local park.

"Sebastian likes to think," the brunette said slowly, weighing her words carefully in an attempt to explain what her stepbrother really did in the moments when he was truly alone.

"Really? That's weird," Juliette's tiny nose crinkled, and Kathryn couldn't help but laugh. It _was_ kind of "weird", as her cousin had so eloquently put it. "So it's up to you to entertain me for today?"

Startled, Kathryn sat up a little bit straighter. It wasn't much of a difference, as her perfect posture prevented slouching on her part, but the muscles in her body seemed to tense at the thought. So that must've been Sebastian's real goal, to get them to spend time together. Well, he was a sly bastard, she'd give him that.

"I guess so," Kathryn drawled, biting her lower lip in thought. She had always prided herself on being Manhattan's best hostess-in-training (among other things…), obvious successor to her mother's title. However, six year olds had never been her expertise, and Kathryn Merteuil found herself at a loss as to what to do.

"Want to shop?" Juliette eyed her cousin knowingly, and Kathryn internally let out a relieved sigh. Finally, a girl after her own heart.

"_Yes_."

--------------------

As two Merteuils exited through the hotel's expensive front door, they just missed the smirking blonde boy in the built-in café. By doing so, they just missed colliding with California's other Merteuil, the one with a more established residence. Heels pounding against the expensive Italian marble, a concerned hotelier rushed over to scold her for scuffing up the floor, but changed tacks with only a glance from the curly haired brunette. Pausing outside the massive glass door, she took a deep breath, smoothing her skirt and attempting to regain some semblance of composure before stepping inside.

"Read anything interesting?" she taunted. "Because there's a _fascinating_ little ditty in the Police Blotter."

Calmly laying down his newspaper, Sebastian Valmont smiled charmingly at his new companion. "Nope, slow day for the newspaper industry. But no news is good news, I suppose."

"It was you, wasn't it?" she asked, her voice a hollow whisper as Cassidy Merteuil plopped into the chair opposite him. Something about her presence made him vaguely uneasy, but there was something indiscernible in her large brown eyes. It read of hope, desperation, gratefulness, confusion. Particularly experienced in the art of analysis of others, Sebastian found himself more intrigued than wary.

"Who did what?" he asked with an entirely misplaced innocence, a tone that he could not have used truthfully for many, many years. The laughter in his eyes betrayed the tone, and she smiled.

"I don't know why you did that. But I appreciate it."

There were many central differences in the relationships Sebastian Valmont had with the women of the Merteuil family. Juliette was a sort of extension of himself, a sister in every way except blood. Kathryn was his sister in no way except legally, his passion, his desire, his everything. Most of the time, he didn't have to voice his thoughts to her, she just _knew_. The key that differentiates his relationship with this brunette and the one before him was that Cassidy could in no way, shape or form read his mind. But she was one of the few people he was willing to spell the thoughts out to. It could be hard to say which means more.

--------------------

Laughter echoed all about the hotel suite as the two lithe women burst through the doorway, arms full of as many bags as they could carry. The rest would be set up later. The afternoon had gone far better than expected, and for the first time in her life, Kathryn Merteuil felt a sort of kinship with the cute blonde who bore her last name.

"Let's eat something," Juliette said eagerly, and her grin widened as Kathryn smiled and nodded. Smarter and far more observant than she appeared, it was another trait she had in common with Valmont. While both appeared callous and far more concerned with themselves than anyone else, they were both finely in tune with the nuances of Kathryn Merteuil. It had only taken Juliette a day or two to get it that way. It had been her plot since seeing the flare of delight in her cousin's deep green eyes when shopping was mentioned, that she could trick her in a sense, into getting worked up over something. It turned out that they had had a wonderful afternoon anyway, but now that she was caught up in the moment, Juliette saw her in. She would get her cousin to fucking _eat _if it was the last thing she did.

Of course, this was much less funny considering her history.

"So, do you want like chocolate or maybe cake?" Kathryn asked, voice muffled, her head buried in the small kitchen cabinets.

"Both!" Juliette squealed. A sharp knock sounded through the room.

"Sebastian probably locked himself out. Let him in, Juliette?"

"Well, duh," the tiny blonde laughed, skipping her way to the colossal door and hauling it open with all her might.

There were many ways to suffer. There is painful separation from the ones you love which so many people deal with, day to day. There is the never-ceasing sting of betrayal, the biting sense that retribution was necessary before you could breathe again. To suffer an illness was one of the most painful sufferings of all, to pair your external ailments with internal turmoil. All humans deal with suffering in the form of a constant struggle to achieve your goals, to feel fulfilled if only for a moment. Yet none of these sufferings comes with quite the shock as does the one of your past coming back to haunt you.

Shocked blue eyes met wide gray ones as the happy smile on Juliette Merteuil's face dropped to be replaced quickly with an expression that one could only register as astonishment.

"_Belinda!_"

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_Hey guys. I'm not sure how this came out, but I've had it in my head for a while, so I thought that I'd try and write it. And post the chapter some time this year. Lol. So **please** review and let me know what you think. I didn't get too many reviews last chapter and was considering holding out on posting until Katie made me realize that I need to post for the people who do review. That girl's a wise one. _

_Ocfan108- I **love** you, you know that? Lol, don't worry, I'm not going to stalk you. But you really get what I'm trying to do with this story. I'm glad that you loved the tea scene, and the bond between the girls, because honestly, I love it too. I made them family for a reason, guys lol._

_Katie- one day, Iwill read Gone with the Wind, just for you. Glad you liked last chapter, and that you appreciated Jason's POV. It's a bitch to write lol._

_Y-x- I determined that I don't actually have issues, but it's nice to know your feelings on the subject. But I certainly wouldn't mind killing "Desmond" in any of these chapters. Trust me, you would too if he did to you what he did to me. Yes, it legally constitutes sexual harassment. Poor guy? Don't think so. Haha. But yeah, I'm almost positive that's the last we'll **ever **see of him. If only life imitated art… haha. Anyway, glad you liked the k/s. Let's see if you mirror it, shall we? Hahah. By the way, I'm **furious **with you over your latest chapter._

_WashedOut- thank you. You know, your reviews make me really nervous…_

Thanks for reading, guys!

Xo Sam

_And because I'm not sure whether The Birds will become an extended story or not, I shall reply to all my beloved reviewers right here lol. By the way, thank you guys **so much **for reading and reviewing that. I always find it touching that people have enough faith in me to read more than one of my stories lol._

_Unfeeling- I'll definitely think about one from Sebastian's POV. It depends on response, I guess. But I'll probably have to get a bit farther in this story before I attempt another chappie one. There's always the risk of being burnt at the stake. Hahah_

_Keri- Humm… another reviewer that I love. Lol even as I was writing the story, I asked myself that same question—"What the fuck does this have to do with birds!" But it did come together in the end, and for that I was grateful to my muse. Very clever of you to notice my Oscar Wilde knock-off in there! Haha_

_Ocfan108- I seriously love hearing what you got out of each of my stories. You totally got the concept in that story, and for that reason alone I thought about adding on lol. I'm actually just kind of relieved that it made sense to somebody other than me._

_Katie- Ohh, Katie. You have to bolster my self-confidence constantly. Hahaha. So thank you for always reading, reviewing, helping, and putting up with me lol._

_yx- Apparently it was. Lol. _


	17. Fear Not My Child

**Breaking the Broken**

_Seventeen_

Fear Not My Child

_Tobacco, coffee, alcohol, hashish, prussic acid, strychnine are weak dilutions:_

_the surest poison is time._

Emerson

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_With memory set smarting like a reopened wound, a man's past is not simply a dead history, an outworn preparation of the present: it is not a repented error shaken loose from the life: it is a still quivering part of himself, bringing shudders and bitter flavors and the tinglings of a merited shame._

George Eliot, _Middlemarch_

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Time is the only enemy and the only ally a person shall ever need. It works with you, against you, in spite of you, regardless of you. No matter what you do, the second will continue to tick away; the hourly chimes will still ring. Church bells sounded loudly, ringing despondently across the deserted campus. There was no one there to see them, but the steady noise in the distance reminded all those who could hear that another hour was gone, and they would never get it back. The events that occurred in the sixty minute intervals between chimes were done, set in stone, and were never to be taken back. That did not mean, of course, that they would not still be felt…

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The television glared defiantly out at the world, illuminating the cavernous living room with flashes of color, interrupting the parlor's quiet with bursts of sound. The dull flashing of the digital clock's brilliant red numbers indicated to whoever chanced a glance at it that two had turned to three. But there was only one woman in that room, and she cared less about the time than she did about the penguins in Central Park Zoo.

Contrary to popular belief, Sebastian Valmont was not only a photographer for pornographic purposes. He was always philosophical, and kind of ridiculous, a camera on him at all times in an attempt to really _feel _the moment. All it took was a click and a flash-- he had tried to explain to her many, many times--and he would have the moment forever to feel over and over again. Maybe if the picture could bring back the feeling, it would all be worth it. She had laughed cruelly at him then, slightly dismayed as his handsome face crumbled in disappointment before the typically bored expression masked all.

His gift extended beyond mere photography, however. Even she could admit, after seeing the final pictures, that he did have a gift. In all too vivid detail, she recalled those times when he dappled in videography, a camcorder taking the place of his usual camera. His intense gaze would always be on the small screen, seeing what was going on around him through machinery. Yet another way of keeping the world at arm's length.

Once, he had coldly countered to her laughter, "Mind your own business. Or do you even know how to do that? I swear, it'll be the end of you one day." As Kathryn Merteuil sat on the overstuffed living room couch, white knuckles tightly clenching the chenille throw as she rocked slightly, she knew that he may very well be right.

A black leather suitcase sat in their closet. She had never remembered him having one before, but it had gone everywhere with them thus far. It shone brightly; the glossy finish attracted all meager light in the room. Not for the first time in her life, Kathryn Merteuil has let her curiosity get the best of her where Sebastian Valmont was concerned. As her delicate hand grasped the case's handles, she cast a wary glance at the large bed in the center of the room. Sebastian and Juliette were curled up, both sleeping peacefully, which was more than unusual. The brunette had been the last one standing, the only one who managed to stay up through the movie they had all been watching. That was always a mistake, leaving Kathryn to her own devices.

As her trembling fingers worked the clasp on the suitcase, she pondered how out of character it was for him to carry one in the first place. In a way, the expensive luggage seemed to symbolize everything Sebastian was, and wasn't, at the same time. Professional, sleek, elegant, cold, immaculate. Yet Sebastian was never one to allow himself to be weighed down, so he usually went everywhere sans luggage.

Unless, of course, you count _emotional_ baggage, in which case…

When she finally managed to get the icy locks open, she was startled by what she found inside. An avalanche of photographs greeted her, a quick blur of colors and edges before they settled into place. Scattered images, memories of which some Kathryn could identify and some she hadn't the foggiest idea, greeted her. However, the keepsakes from the habitually unsentimental Valmont were not the most startling thing the box contained. Gently removing a layer of pictures, she found letters. Letters from _her_. Oh God, how had he gotten these! But as she reached for the top letter, her fingers collided with something much harder. Much blacker. Much more like a videotape.

Electric green eyes widening in shock, her mind had reeled at the possibilities of what could be on this tape. She could pretty much rule out religious ceremonies, weddings, and graduations. Unpredictable as Sebastian was, he could always be counted upon to scorn what others held dear. Could it be a conquest? As she took in the label on the side, she had one thought.

'_Dear God, I hope not_.'

**Jules**

And now she sat alone in the cavernous living room, a victim of her own curiosity, as the tape blaring mercilessly from the screen.

Perfectly put together as always, Juliette bounced up to the camera with golden curls gleaming. However, they were the only part of her that _truly_ sparkled and bounced, her face retaining a hollow grayish quality. Her clothes hung slightly awkwardly on her frame, made up of only skin and bones, but the child kept the quality that made you just want to hug her.

"Hey Sebastian!"

"Hey Julie. What are you doing?" Sebastian's deep voice questioned from off-screen.

"Talking to you," she giggled slightly. "Can I be in your movie?"

"I'm not really making a movie, Jules. I'm just filming stuff."

Her forehead puckered slightly, and it appeared that she was about to ask why. However, Juliette Merteuil's understanding of Sebastian Valmont went far deeper than that. No questions were needed. "Can you film me?"

"Why?" he laughed.

"Because I'm not always going to be here, and I want you to remember me," she said solemnly, big blue eyes boring holes through the camera.

There was a moment of hesitation, a quiet pause that seemed suspended in time forever. Kathryn could almost _feel_, though he was behind the camera, the conflicting emotions passing over her stepbrother's face. Finally, he said a quiet, "Okay" and she could hear something raw in his voice that she couldn't quite place. The screen went black for a moment, the camera shutting off. A second later, it flickered back on. It was still Juliette, in the same outfit as the previous footage, but the setting was different. The tiny four year old was perched on a fluffy vanity stool and staring intently at the camera lens.

"So, what's your name?" Sebastian questioned from behind the camera, sounding slightly amused.

"Juliette Annalise Isabelle Merteuil," she replied primly, smoothing her skirt.

"And how old are you, Miss Juliette Annalise Isabelle Merteuil?"

"Four," she tilted her chin defiantly, making eye contact with something just above the camera lens and grinning.

"How many languages do you speak?"

"Five," Juliette grinned proudly.

"Which one is your favorite?"

"French, obviously."

"You don't like English?"

"English counts as a language?" she puzzled. Sebastian laughed from behind the screen.

"Yes, Jules, English counts as a language."

"Then I guess I like that one best. But I really like that my mommy can't speak French, but grandmere can, and so can Kathryn and Cassidy. It's like having a secret code."

"Who are Kathryn and Cassidy?"

"You know who they are, Sebastian," the four year old attempted a withering gaze.

"Ah, ah, ah. Not Sebastian. You're talking to the camera, Jules."

"Oh. Right. Sorry, I forgot. Kathryn and Cassidy are the prettiest, smartest, most cleverest girls in the entire universe. They're my cousins."

"What are your favorite things?"

"French fries, shopping, General Hospital, and you," she smiled, and this time he didn't reprimand her for not speaking to the camera.

"And what are you afraid of?"

This time, her pretty face took on a contemplative look, a far more serious tone falling upon the impromptu interview.

"Time," she said finally, looking up at the camera. "Well, not having enough time. What if I don't have enough time to see everything and feel everything and go everywhere? What if everybody else sees the whole movie, and all I get is the trailer?" she coughed slightly.

"Juliette, you're four years old. You have plenty of time," Sebastian's smooth voice had a harsher quality to it, as if it was being strangled in his throat and he forced it to come out. Juliette said nothing, but when she looked back up at the camera, her deep eyes were pools of sadness.

"I'm really sick, Sebastian."

"You're going to be **_fine_**, Jules. Come on, let's go for a ride. Want to ride in my car?"

"Yes," she chirped, a slight smile briefly fleeting across her features.

"What are the rules?"

"I can't touch anything except for the radio," Juliette recited dutifully. The scene turned black again, only the little date timer shown brightly from the corner of the screen. The white words stuck out in great contrast to the darkness of the screen, and Kathryn could feel her heart plummet as she took it in. March 23. Only two days before Juliette's own heart had failed her. It seemed like she knew it would too, in the footage, but accepted it in a sort of resignation too mature for someone of her age.

"I'm okay now, you know?" a little voice called to her from behind the couch, and for a moment, Kathryn thought that the tape had continued. More than startled, the beautiful brunette realized that it wasn't the video-version but the real Juliette.

"I know," Kathryn said, hastily wiping at her eyes and cursing herself silently for letting her voice sound so hoarse.

"That's the thing I loved about Sebastian. He was the only person that knew what was going to happen to me, and kept trying to cheer me up. Everybody else was either one or the other. They either thought I was going to die and walked around whispering quietly and giving me sad looks, as if I already did. Or they were in complete denial, and kept asking me if I wanted to go the circus," Juliette shook her head, mussed golden tendrils flying. "Sebastian knew I could die, and he didn't try and hide it, but he kept trying to make me laugh anyway."

"Well, that's Sebastian for you. He's just a bundle of laughs," Kathryn deadpanned as Juliette made her way around the couch. The blonde stared impenetrably at her cousin, and Kathryn felt bizarrely naked in front of the small child, as if she could see right down into her soul and pass judgment on all that it contained.

"Don't cry, Kathryn. I'm fine," Juliette yawned, her eyelids drooping slightly as she rested her head on Kathryn's shoulder. Taken slightly aback by the warm, comfortable gesture, Kathryn stared at the little girl.

"I'm not crying."

"But you want to. Don't worry about me, I'm just fine."

Wrapping the blanket around Juliette, the two girls sat there in silence for a few moments.

"I'm not that clever," Kathryn admitted, biting her lower lip slightly. Juliette laughed sleepily.

"Yes you are. I heard all about what you did to Court Reynolds. It was brilliant. But he had it coming, you know?"

"I know," Kathryn murmured quietly, relieved that someone finally understood the gnawing urge inside of her to decimate the boy who had so thoroughly humiliated her. It didn't matter much that this someone was only six years old.

Still reeling from the bitter betrayal of years ago, Kathryn Merteuil began to understand why Sebastian Valmont developed such a rapport with the young Juliette. She was young and beautiful and intelligent, full of acceptance for those who had twisted her morals in such a way. Her deep blue eyes looked at the world in the way that it was, neither hating what she saw nor loving it. She just **_saw_**. And in the six years she had been walking the earth, Juliette Merteuil had seen many, many things.

As the two beautiful woman lie curled together on the couch, there was a bitter truth that hung in the air around them, one that managed to embed itself even in the golden heart of a child. Time heals all wounds, but a scar will remain.

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It had been a dark and stormy night, a wonderful cliché, on the night that would change Alain Merteuil's life forever. It was on this night, stranded in San Francisco on business, that he realized he could fly as far away as he wanted, and he could marry as Catholics as he pleased, but he would always be a Merteuil, and the legacy that ran through his blood would not let him forget it. That night, his young bride had stayed behind with her ailing father. He carried her picture, placed it on his nightstand, thought about her at every spare moment, and it was never enough. The Merteuil in his veins began to burn and bubble, making him light-headed and reckless. He never could control himself the way his mother wanted.

It had been this night that he had given into the flirtations of his coworker. He had been holding out for weeks, twiddling his thumbs waiting for the business hours to end so he could run home to Camilla and she could remind him of how in love they were. However, on this dark and stormy night, Camilla was hundreds of miles away, and Bethany had been right there. A few hours and a few more cocktails later, and he found himself sweaty and naked and not quite as alone as his wife would've preferred. Guilt set in as he turned his beautiful wife's picture face down, but quickly subsided to anger as he'd realized that everyone had been right all along--- he and Camilla would never last. And of course they wouldn't, they were too different. He was wild and handsome and rich, a notorious playboy. She was beautiful and mild and had morals, and yes, he firmly believed that the blonde was too good for him. But like the spoiled child that he was, it didn't matter if he didn't deserve something. He wanted her, and you'd better believe he would damn well have her. Alain did love Camilla, in some way, but on this night he found himself with a woman who was very much not her, and found himself angrier with his mother being right than with himself for betraying his wife.

They had parted the next day, having her solemn word that the sordid tale would never leave the Hilton suite. While the tale did not, it was not just the two of them that left the hotel.

It had been blustering and cold, the wind whipping leaves across the dewy grass as the gray sky fought to find some semblance of color. He would always remember this day, perhaps even more so than the previously mentioned one, and the scenery stuck out clearly in his mind because it was so similar to the eyes that would haunt his dreams from that point on.

The doorbell had rung, the sound resounding ominously through the massive Merteuil mansion. Cursing himself for letting the butlers have a day off, Alain had taken his time walking to the door. Even in a hurry, he had never been one to actually _hurry_. Tearing himself away from his sickly three year old's side for only a moment hadn't seemed like such a large deal.

An exquisite creature stood on the other side, a young woman of only fifteen with a heart-shaped face and the lightest gray eyes it was possible for one to have. Long blonde hair tumbled down her back, and she fixed him with a piercing stare that seemed to freeze his insides. It was this feeling that caused his delayed reaction time, that caused him to fail to immediate notice her incredible resemblance to a woman he had known _intimately_ before. But the look in her eyes was not one that could come from her, and he had a sinking feeling that he knew where she would have developed that particular distain for the world…

"I'm Belinda Van Ryan."

"Bethany's daughter?" he asked hesitantly.

"And yours," she smiled, but it was one colder than he had ever bore witness to in his life, and having grown up in Tromperie Manor, that was saying something. "But I see I'm not the only one."

Whipping around, his panicked eyes fell upon the tiny three year old at the foot of the marble staircase. Dressed in a pale blue nightgown with her mussed golden curls forming a halo about her delicate head, she looked just like the little angel everyone made her out to be. However, Daddy's little angel had a look in those deep blue eyes that screaming of betrayal, anger, confusion, and an eerie sort of acceptance and understanding that was entirely misplaced. It was with this eye contact that he had felt their relationship strain, the bond between them splintering as Juliette came under scruntization by the beautiful blonde at the doorway.

"You look revolting," she had sneered, looking down her nose at the frail child. However, the child did not quivering, cower, or cry as all had expected her to. Instead she marched up to the much taller blonde, tilted her head back as far as she could, and commanded eye contact.

"I'm sick. What's _your_ excuse?" Juliette looked her up and down before glaring coldly at her and turning, appearing to float back up the stairs without a second glance, leaving a shocked silence in her wake.

It was this shakeup, this sudden appearance of a secret child that had truly destroyed the family. Juliette took it as a given that she would keep the appearance of Belinda Van Ryan a secret from her pristine mother, and Alain would never know how to break the news. The closeness between them had never been fully restored, the pink elephant in the room coming in the form of cold blonde who became one of the world's top supermodels.

Yet with each passing night, Alain would wonder whether keeping these incidents a secret was the wisest move. With each night he would cuddle with his wife of many years, the betrayals began to eat at him, and he wondered how much longer Belinda Van Ryan could be silenced. He had the uneasy notion that she was not done reeking havoc upon their family. The cold expressions upon the gorgeous girl's face had been reminiscent only of an angry Merteuil, conjuring images of his mother, his sisters, his nieces. Now, as he grew older and so did his pride and joy, Juliette retained the same characteristics and bore an uncanny resemblance to the model wedging them apart. Sometimes it appeared that she thought so too, idly tugging at her curls or glaring at herself with great distain in one of her many mirrors.

Alain Merteuil was right, of course. As he lie awake that night thinking ominous thoughts, she was closer to blowing his carefully constructed world apart than he thought, and closer to his daughter than he could ever imagine.

What he could never have imagined was the new family setting Juliette had grown into in the short time she had been gone, one equally threatened by Belinda Van Ryan's presence in the hotel.

What no one could foresee was that the supermodel would find a far worthier adversary in the small child than she could ever imagine. Juliette still felt the sting of her arrival, the pain of having familial stability ripped away just when her health had taken a turn for the worse. She would not let _anyone _ruin the new family she had just formed. She would die first.

Time heals all wounds, but the scars remain.

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_Sigh. I know that this sucked, so in your reviews, please just tell me how I can improve lol. I actually had most of the chapter written, and it was probably the first one I've written that I ever liked… and my computer crashed. And I just couldn't write it the same way again. So hopefully this didn't make you run screaming from your computers, and I'm sorry you didn't get to see the first edition lol. _

_Now, I'm proud of this story for one reason—I managed to make Maggie love Kathryn and hate Annette. Maggie is my friend from waaay back when I first starting writing One Tree Hill fanfiction, and she isn't totally warped like the rest of us, so I feel that it's an accomplishment that we managed to make her see the dark side. _

_Hehe… and none of you wondered why Juliette knew what an illegitimate love child was…_

_I really had to post this though, as I noticed that there hasn't been a single new CI thing to read for all of November. What's with that!_

_WashedOut- Thank you for elaborating. And reviewing. Lol. I finally stopped having panic attacks over your reviews…_

_Ocfan108- Merci!_

_Luvs-bitch01- More k/s is coming, but there are a lot of things I need to establish before I forget to put them in the story completely lol. I'm glad I made it Halloween+Christmas-like for you. Hopefully this chapter hasn't turned you off the story completely. _

_Babeekim- it really means a lot to me that you like this fic so much. I love it that you love Juliette. Lol, I'm starting to love this character more than like… chocolate. And that's serious. Haha _

_Keri- well, I actually e-mailed you in a rambling response to your review, so instead of repeating, I'll just keep that between us and thank you for reviewing. I love getting your insight into things._

_Katie- Lol yeah, I know, you tried to drill it into my rock-hard-head… NO C/S. I got the message, lol. Don't worry. I'll save you from yourself regarding CI. _


	18. A Little Doubt Goes A Long Way

**Breaking the Broken**

_Eighteen_

A Little Doubt Goes A Long Way

_There is nothing more dreadful than the habit of doubt. Doubt separates people. It is a poison that disintegrates friendships and breaks up pleasant relations. It is a thorn that irritates and hurts; it is a sword that kills._

Buddha

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There was a peculiar sort of tranquility, a delicate state suspended about them as if they were too charged to actually react to the situations. Surveying her kin over her teacup, Isabelle Merteuil had rarely been so proud.

"So," she said primly, a practiced composure about her though her thoughts were racing, as she gently placed the cup back on the saucer. "What you're saying is that you'd like to destroy this boy because he cuddled with your cousin?"

Cassidy frowned slightly, reflecting upon everything she had said thus far. While in her own mind, her vengeance was completely justified, it sounded slightly ridiculous aloud.

"Don't worry, darling. It's not imbecilic," the older woman said, a hint of a smile crossing her pretty features. These features, so reminiscent of Kathryn's, did nothing to calm the raging storm within Cassidy Merteuil. Taking in her grandmother's clear complexion, finely featured face, glossy dark hair, electric green eyes and unshakeable poise, she cursed the family yet again for skipping over her on a few of those traits. Somehow, it felt that if she had possessed them, none of this would be happening. "The very same thing happened to me once."

"_Really_?" Cassidy's face registered vague disbelief.

"No. _They_ call that comfort," Isabelle snorted into her cup of tea. "What's this asshole's name?"

"Jason Argyle," Cassidy replied promptly, invoking images of her childhood in which she would chirp immediate responses to questions anyone would ask her. Age had taught her to be elusive, but she had once been so eager to please. In the moments where she spoke, the attention was on her, and it was a feeling she had truly relished. At Prestridge University, she had never had to vie for the attention on which she so thrived, yet in her own family, it was an uphill battle.

"Sounds poor," Isabelle turned up her nose. "Actually, he sounds like he's gorgeous in a tall, dark and handsome way, but he's nowhere near good enough to be near you. Or Kathryn." She cringed slightly.

Rolling her eyes slightly, Cassidy knew that somehow this would once again lead back to Kathryn. Malice shown in her large cold eyes as she took a swipe. Yes, yes, yes, she knew that it was wrong to bait your own grandmother, but Isabelle was nobody's gramma. "Sebastian quite agreed."

Choking slightly, Isabelle lowered her cup and her face registered an emotion that made Cassidy quite giddy. It was identical to one that Kathryn herself would make. She called it victory, but most people would decree it blind fear. It came and went in a flash, but it was there nonetheless.

"So, Sebastian knows about this… discretion?" the elder Merteuil chose her words carefully, a frown puckering her forehead. Truthfully, Cassidy had regretted coming to her grandmother with this in the first place. For so long, it had just been habitual to keep the matriarch informed of her activities, but it was different now. It was not just higher stakes, it was an entirely different game, and you could never been sure where Isabelle Merteuil's loyalties would lie.

"Indeed. He was _quite_ displeased," Cassidy smiled faintly, recalling the last time she had taken tea in this room. Juliette's eyes, large and innocent and excited and worried at that moment, loomed large in her mind.

"How do you know?"

"He tried to leave her," she drawled, boredom evident in her voice though her eyes shown with a manic gleam of excitement. The gentle tinkling of expensive china crashing to its end was her reward, although it paled in comparison to the complete shock on its holder's face.

"Sebastian Valmont did _what_? Did she stop him?"

"Of course," Cassidy snorted. "She used the kid as collateral, I think."

Sneering at her grandchild's slight distain for her cousin, Isabelle scanned the room for a familiar face. Giving up her search for the two other granddaughters expected to meet them for brunch, she began to turn around to signal a waiter to clean up the mess resulting from her shock when she received a larger one.

The alcove was shadowy, but there was no mistaking it. As the proud matriarch of the Merteuil family, she prided herself on being able to recognize her relations anywhere, whether they had grown, changed their hair, or were in complete disguise (and considering her family, all were entirely probable.) It was this grandmotherly trait, however much she tried to deny that she was old enough to have grandchildren, which set off the flashing red lights in her mind. In that corner, she would recognize the golden curls anywhere, was Juliette Merteuil. However the usually relaxed child's entire body was contorted with anxiety, or perhaps rage. Her calm eyes were filled with fury, blue flames seeming to appear. Fire, so hot that it was cold, burned from deep within her. Standing opposite her, appeared to be her in the future. A tall lanky blonde with corkscrew curls and impossibly light gray eyes glared back at her. Isabelle was sure that she had never seen the older girl before, but there was something uncannily familiar about her…

"Good morning grandmere. Morning, Cassidy. Sorry I'm late. I couldn't reach the elevator button," Juliette laughed slightly, placing a kiss on each cheek of both women. She sat down opposite her grandmother, leaving a vacant place at the square table, but the tension still hadn't seeped from her shoulders and her eyes were not quite as happy as her voice.

"Who's your friend?" Cassidy asked, peering distastefully at the gorgeous blonde who had taken a seat next to a man Cassidy recognized only from Wimbledon.

"No friend of mine," Juliette snarled, but caught herself. "I'm not sure who she is, but she's quite rude. Thought I looked familiar. She seemed to think I was someone else."

The blatant lie hung awkwardly over the table. Isabelle's perfected arched eyebrow shot up in Juliette's direction, and Cassidy peered intently at her cousin. Juliette stared blankly ahead, eyes wide with kept secrets that neither could hope to crack out of her.

"Where's Kathryn?" Isabelle asked, peering around and realizing, it seemed for the first time, that Kathryn hadn't accompanied Juliette downstairs.

"She couldn't make it," the tiny blonde smiled mischievously, her cherubic face lit up in sheer delight.

"You didn't give her the message, did you, Juliette?" Isabelle's eyes narrowed slightly at her granddaughter, her face impassive as always.

"No," Juliette nodded solemnly. Isabelle's face broke out into a smile.

"That a girl."

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The silence that hung here was far emptier. There was no lazy chatter, no chiming of fine china, no servants all too eager to cater to their rich customers. Instead, the television played quietly in the background, and a curly haired blonde sat at a desk, chain-smoking and staring out the window.

"Anybody home?" Kathryn called, and there was a smile in her voice. Sebastian smiled a little at hearing this. It had been there more than usual, the underlying note of happiness that seemed too shocked at its own existence to manifest itself openly.

"I'm in the bedroom," Sebastian called back.

"Your natural habitat?" Kathryn jested, walking into the bedroom with her arms full of shopping bags. They hadn't been staying there long, but they were considering buying a whole new set of furniture for the room. With Kathryn's purchases alone, they would need at least two more chests of drawers. Sebastian had enough trouble wrapping his head around the bags that resided in his bedroom, the clothes taking over his closet. He didn't even attempt to amass Juliette's purchases.

"Somebody's in a good mood," he remarked sardonically, stamping out the cigarette and turning to face her. To his surprise, she was smiling as she attempted to shove more items into the closet.

"Yeah. Have you ever just woken up and felt like it was a good day?" she turned to him, a puzzled expression on her pretty face.

"Not really," he admitted honestly, shrugging his broad shoulders.

"Me neither. But this one hasn't been so bad."

"Good," he turned back to the window, surveying his surroundings. If he squinted, he could see the campus of Prestridge University. This prestigious school represented so much to him at the moment. It was the home of Cassidy, of that scum Jason. His fists clenched tightly just thinking about him. It was the reason they were there in the first place, he supposed.

"Hey Kat, how much longer are we going to be here?"

"I'm not sure. Why?" Kathryn peered curiously out from behind the closet door.

"No reason. I was just thinking maybe we'd get an apartment or something if we're going to be here a lot longer."

"You don't like the hotel?"

"I don't really care," Sebastian shrugged. "But Juliette mentioned this morning at breakfast that she hates it here."

"Is it _here_ or hotels in general?" Kathryn asked, frowning deeply.

"I'm not sure."

"Well, we need to figure it out."

"Why?"

"Because, this is a really nice hotel. What could be bothering her about it?"

"No bed?" Sebastian shrugged, a slight smile curling his pouty lips.

"No, she likes that. Besides, she knows that she could have her own room if she wanted. Has she met anyone here? If someone's bothering her, Sebastian, we need to handle it."

"Look at you, all concerned," Sebastian leaned back in his chair, loosening his tie and undoing the top few buttons. It seemed that whenever Kathryn was in the room, his body temperature went up a few degrees. A smirk flitted across his handsome face as conflicting emotions crossed her eyes, an internal struggle to contain the emotions. He could almost see the thoughts crossing her face, and they were both thinking it at the same moment: since when did she care?

"Please, like you wouldn't go and beat the shit out of anybody who looks at her in the wrong way," Kathryn scoffed, giving up her fight to discern her thoughts and swiftly redirecting the subject. "Speaking of, where is Juliette?"

"She said she was going downstairs," Sebastian drawled, searching his pockets for another cigarette.

"You just let her? Who is going to watch her?"

"Oh, just about anybody with eyes. Please Kat, the girl is like mini-you. If she walks into a room, people will pay attention."

At her withering gaze, he continued with a sigh. "Okay, fine, I tried to follow her. She instructed me to stay right here."

Kathryn laughing internally at the vision of the frail six year old bossing around the muscular young man. "Why?" she asked curiously, knowing full well that Juliette would glue herself to Sebastian if it was an option.

"I don't know," he said, immersing himself in a large novel on the table. Typical of Sebastian, he couldn't even hold a conversation without multiple diversions at his fingertips. "She probably thinks that if we're alone, we'll fuck, or get married, or whatever six year old girls think."

Kathryn's eyebrows rose silently, casting an appreciate gaze over the distracted Sebastian. Just a hint of the golden perfection of his chest was visible, and his curls were adorably rumpled as if he had run his hand through it nervously. Blasé as he opted to be, she knew that he was going insane staying in the room by himself. There were just too many things to worry about outside of it. "Weddings, usually."

"Good to know," he mumbled, eyes narrowing adorably in concentration.

A moment of hesitation on her part, before crossing the room and taking the book out of his hands. Snapping it shut resolutely, she met his eyes as she lowered herself onto his lap.

"We should talk," Kathryn said, a slight smile curling her lips.

"That would be nice," Sebastian whispered, long fingers wandering idly up her thighs.

"So, what have you been up to lately?" she asked conversationally, wondering exactly how one began a conversation with Sebastian Valmont. She had never really had to try before. The conversations between them had always started of their own accord, it seemed, as if the entire time they knew each other had been one long conversation, and the times when they were apart were just silence. Lately, they just hadn't been communicating in the same way. It was as if they felt closer to each other than ever, but the gap between them was growing simultaneously. She had renounced her pride enough to admit that she needed him to stay with her; she figured it wouldn't hurt to make an attempt to converse. Yet with his fingertips brushing slightly against the lace of her panties, it was kind of difficult.

"Oh, nothing really. Same old, same old," he replied with a charming smile, an irritatingly knowing grin.

"Any new conquests?" her eyes slid closed briefly, reopening with a determined intensity as her irises bored into his and she moved closer to him.

"No, I haven't been nearly as busy as you, it seems," his smile took on a distinctly colder quality.

"You're just a bundle of laughs, aren't you?"

"Yep, just full of them."

"You're full of something…" Kathryn trailed off, a smirk lighting up her face. This was a step towards it, she could feel it. The banter she had been sorely missing.

"You're… just… precious," Sebastian ground out, but with no real malice evident. "I would've come back, you know that, right?"

"I know," Kathryn answered confidently, but genuine emotion shown through, insecurity seeping through her pores. However, she was grateful. He had given her what she needed. Stability. Something sure to cling onto. She needed to know that he hadn't come back because she pleaded, but because he wanted to. He wanted _her_.

"You _want_ me?" Kathryn's head snapped back, her eyes wide open. She had known it all along, he had made that quite apparently on the day of their parents wedding, and before that even. But somehow, she had to realize it herself. She didn't realize she said it aloud, though.

"Obviously," Sebastian grumbled, casting a pointedly look downward at the growing bulge in his pants.

Something flickered in her eyes then. "I didn't fuck Jason."

"Poor him, missing out on what most of New York has experienced. Tell me, Kathryn, when _do _you plan on making your services national?"

"Probably sooner than you if _this_ is what all your suavity has been reduced to," Kathryn smirked playfully.

"Touché," Sebastian laughed appreciatively.

"But nothing's going to happen between Jason and myself. He actually has a challenge lined up that he mentioned in passing," she said smoothly, leaning into the crook of his neck. Her breath was hot against his skin, and he succumbed to the desire to close his eyes and just _be_ with her for only a moment.

"Looking for your approval?" Sebastian questioned sardonically.

"Maybe. Although he and his roommate are actually looking for your approval, it seems."

"Well, fucking my stepsister isn't the usual way to go about it," he sneered.

"They've read the journal, Sebastian," Kathryn persisted, a flare up of anger present in her eyes as she painfully squeezed his fingers. He winced, at both her words and actions. It had been a long time ago, of course, that Kathryn had first been exposed in Manhattan society. With time, the scandal had blown over somewhat, and it stopped being such a sensitized issue. However, the scar left behind by this particular old wound was deep, dark, and jagged, and one best left unexamined.

"That's funny. Did Jason need somebody to help him out with the big words?"

"Fuck you."

"One day," he nodded solemnly.

"Anyway, they're both trying to fuck Annette Hargrove," she changed tacks, returning to her previous point and weighing his reaction carefully. His entire body froze, which irritated her quite thoroughly as she was on the verge of the orgasm she had been so brutally denied by her previous night's bedmate. "What the fuck?"

"What do you mean, they're trying to get Annette?"

"Wow. Okay, Einstein, just in case you missed it, I'll lay it out for you. Annette proclaimed her virginity to the entire country in a teen magazine. You snatched said virginity for one of our more infamous bets. You wrote about it in your journal, which she published… _after_ removing the pages describing her first time," Kathryn said slowly, and she could see the pieces all snapping together in his eyes, but continued nonetheless. "They want her for the same reason you did. They think she's chaste, so they're both going to try and fuck her. Their game is to see who could do it first. Personally, my money's on Patrick. Jason's better looking, but Patrick's already her boyfriend. She gave it up after a few _days_ of knowing you, so God knows he isn't far off."

Instead of the amusement flickering across his face, the evil smirk she had expected to greet her, it seemed as if rage had sprung a leak somewhere within him and now he was bursting at the seams with it. In a storm of absolute fury, he tore about the room collecting his jacket and keys. Somehow he had placed Kathryn onto the bed, where she lay accompanied by her confusion.

"What the fuck are you doing?"

He halted. His motions ceased, and it seemed like time slowed down for only a moment as he reflected. What the fuck _was_ he doing? There were a million and one questions that Sebastian wanted to ask Kathryn at that moment, but he couldn't. All he knew was that the hotel room suddenly seemed much too small, too stifling, and if he had to stay there for another moment, it would suffocate him completely. "I just… I think I need to go for a drive."

Staring incredulously at him, Kathryn fastened the buttons on her shirt that she couldn't quite remember being undone during their encounter.

"You're going for a drive?"

"Yeah, I think so."

The plates seemed to diverge then, a clashing of then and now, the past and the present, that sent her head reeling.

"Why does that upset you?" her eyes searched for the truth within his own, demanding it. Kathryn searched not for meaning but for honesty within the light blue orbs of his eyes, refusing to befall the trap that had ensnared so many before her.

"I don't know. I guess I just don't want either of them getting credit for my accomplishment, you know? People think I _died_ for her, what kind of fucking pussy would I look like if I got myself killed for a girl who didn't even put out?"

"Hello, asshole, in case you missed it, YOU'RE. NOT. DEAD," Kathryn spat. "Are you seriously leaving me for her again?"

"I'm not leaving _you_, Kat."

"If you walk out that door right now, you've left."

A stalemate occurred between them, eyes locked with a fearful intensity. Neither would give up their position, and neither trusted the other's intentions. Stressed, _tense_ moments passed, the keys imprinting themselves upon his tightly clenched hand. Even when the keys hit the glossy wooden desktop, and he lie beside her on the bed, a gape remained between them, an unbridgeable gap which contained their past, their future, and the threats facing them now. Neither felt as if they'd won. In a way, they'd both lost so much more.

----------------

_Hey guys. I'm not going to rant on about how I don't like this chapter, because apparently that irritates all of you. But just know that I'm saying it internally. The end._

_Oh, how I love this part… I thrive on your reviews like Cassidy does on attention lol._

_I did read y-x's newest chapter, and I must say that this chapter was probably vaguely influence by it. Namely, because I was affected by it. I feel my K/S-ness slipping away. When I get a spare moment, I think I'm going to have to re-watch the movie before I do something moronic. This is a sad day for K/S lol._

_Anonymous- Um, yes, my self-esteem is pretty low. Thanks for asking?_

_Maggie- I'm glad you love Juliette. Moi aussi! She's probably my favorite character in the universe at the moment lol. I promise that I'll update At the Heart of It All. I **swear**, I'll get around to it. It's just so hard to go from so dark to so light, you know? K/S and Brucas are **very** different._

_Leigh- Lol whether that freak out is warranted or not… my lips are sealed._

_Katie- don't you just love Jules more and more with each chapter? I do. I feel like I should give her her own like **novel**. Hahah. Wait… do you smell a sequel? We'll discuss that later lol. She keeps coming out so much better than even I planned lol._

_Keri- lol, I just realized now that I probably scared the shit out of you by e-mailing. Don't fear the e-mail. It's not a flag. I'm glad that you liked that chapter, and I must say I was kind of happy that I managed to shock even you. But definitely go and read that e-mail. There's some important stuff in there lol…_

_WashedOut- Why, thank you._

_Luvs-bitch01- Lol and when is CI **not** disturbing? _

_Ocfan108- Hehe, I like live for your reviews. Okay, that was dramatic. Never mind. I'm really glad that I managed to floor you last time lol. This chapter wasn't nearly as revealing, but it was important nonetheless. Don't worry, I did trace the bloodlines before I put that twist in—Belinda is **not** blood related to Sebastian in any way. I do find it astounding that you always seem to manage what I'm trying to convey with my stories. So cool. Lol. _

_Lol wow, I just came up with something completely insane for the coming chapters. I can't wait to write it hahah..._


	19. Judgment, Rage, Retribution and Thyme

For Keri, who reminds me exactly why I'm K/S.

**Breaking the Broken**

_Nineteen_

Judgment, Rage, Retribution and Thyme

-

_We can't be sure who the villains are, 'cause everyone's so pretty…_

Sheryl Crow

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_Family likeness has often a deep sadness in it. Nature, that great tragic dramatist, knits us together by bone and muscle, and divides us by the subtler web of our brains; blends yearning and repulsion; and ties us by our heart-strings to the beings that jar us at every movement._

George Eliot, _Adam Bede_

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She puffed steadily on her cigarette, smoke rings wafting lazily towards the ceiling where the rickety fan promptly destroyed them. It was a volatile scene, and each move made had to be calculated. There was no margin for error.

Jason Argyle's mind raced, the image of the tempting goddess perched casually on his bed burned into his irises even after he'd turned away. The Cheshire grin spreading across her pretty face, the predatory gleam in her eyes. She reminded him of a sphinx, cunning and cruel, who held all the answered but gave you them only in riddles. Cassidy Merteuil was most certainly up to something, but the grayish smog that distorted his eyesight was clouding his judgment, and he hadn't the foggiest idea what.

Patrick Bale smiled over at the pair from his position on his own bed. Jason stood confounded, one hand on his hip and the other running through his dark hair, while Cassidy sat cool as anything on the twin sized bed.

What she was proposing was absurd, to say the least. Cassidy, being the concerned friend that she was, wanted to make sure that their semester was less than sucky. She had been stewing for days, or so she said, trying to come up with something to amuse the boys when it suddenly came to her. They should play to their strengths.

"Well, the only thing you guys really have in common is that you're manipulative assholes, and the only thing you really like to do is have sex," she said affectionately, rumpling Patrick's hair in a sisterly fashion that didn't suit her in the least. Her pert nose wrinkled in disgust, "Preferably not with each other. Actually, I don't know that. Whatever you're into."

Both college boys had almost thrown up on the spot, and she grinned, highly amused. "Well, why don't you combine your skills and your favorite hobby?"

Her idea was interesting to say the least. There were only two girls on the entire campus that could rival her in infamy—Alison Lebray and Sheila Wright. Alison was a beautiful Hispanic girl, smart and classy, and she had just about everything a normal girl could want—including a rich fiancée. Alison and Dave had been friends since forever, and they had gotten together a few years ago much to the delight of their parents, who just so happen to be business partners. Sheila was equally desirable to the boys of Prestridge University, and just as off-limits. The gorgeous blonde had a long-term boyfriend in Michael Cattrall, and they were so gag-worthy that they'd even made their college decisions together.

Yet there was another thing that the two beautiful co-eds had in common: they had both been taken under the wing of the glamorous Cassidy Merteuil. So sweet, so kind, she was. Both had been from out of town and hadn't the faintest clue how to cope in California, and she had shown them the ropes.

Unfortunately for them, they had never caught on that Cassidy was not quite who she appeared to be. Patrick and Jason were just _fully_ learning the lesson for themselves.

"So you're saying that we should seduce them?"

"I didn't say that…" she stated innocently, an evil smile curving her red lips.

"You implied it," Patrick chimed in, and Cassidy winked at him as Jason turned to look at his friend.

"What do you think?" he whispered. Cassidy rolled her eyes as they proceeded to converse like she wasn't in the room, as if their hushed tones could keep their words from reaching her ears. She had been born with super-sonic hearing, and they could've been whispering from down the hall and she would still hear them loud and clear. Further more, she didn't need to _hear_ what they were saying. She knew exactly what they would do, and she knew it long before they did.

"Okay. We'll do it. I get Sheila," Jason stated, turning back around with the thrill of a challenge alighting his eyes.

"Fine by me," Patrick shrugged. "What do we get out of it?"

"Glory?" Cassidy suggested half-heartedly. Both stared at her. "What, that's not good enough for you? It would take you years otherwise to earn my respect! But I guess a little monetary prize isn't out of the question."

A beeper sounded in the room, cutting off the further inquisition from the boys. An amused little smile crawled across her lips as she looked back up at them.

"Speaking of, I have to go meet our girls now. I'll send them your love," she said in a mocking tone, dropping a curt kiss on the cheek for both boys and heading out.

"Actually, Cassidy, have you spoken to Kathryn lately?" Jason called curiously after her, appearing suspiciously like a spaniel. Its owner could use it, abuse it, and disregard it as if it were trash, but they would follow loyally nonetheless. It caused her a slight pang to know that this absurd devotion that had once been all hers was now directed at her lovely cousin. She slammed the door shut, but not before they caught a brief glimpse of the scowl distorting her features.

It had taken them far too long. While both had a sinking feeling as they made the deal, the suspicious notion of selling one's soul to the devil, they were too late. The ropes she had shown them all were not as they seemed. The ties she had used to weave them all together were far more similar to strings. And each Merteuil, different as they were, were natural-born puppeteers.

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"Kathryn Merteuil, are you in here?" her enraged voice rang through the room before they even heard the slamming of the door. Exchanging an alarmed look with his female, miniature version, Sebastian Valmont quickly scooped up Juliette, plopped a kiss on his beloved stepsister's cheek and left through the closest door. Kathryn Merteuil was on her own for this one.

"Kathryn, answer me goddamn it, are you in here?"

"In here, grandmere," she sighed, raising her voice just loudly enough to be heard through the four rooms that separated the bedroom from the living room. Swift and determined, the clacking of expensive heels sped rapidly through the massive suite until they ceased completely, and the bedroom door flew open, revealing a livid Isabelle Merteuil.

It was a difficult and delicate procedure, weighing the anger of a Merteuil woman. All of them had their little ticks, but not all were quite as obvious as the way Cassidy would stamp her foot. Isabelle's jaw would tighten slightly, her bright eyes would open as wide as they could go without appearing surprised, and she could curl her pinky fingers in ever so slightly. Glancing discreetly, she saw that both hands were tightly clenched, and Kathryn prepared herself for the worst.

"Sit down," the regal older woman barked, and her younger version dropped obediently onto the bed. As she hit the softness of the mattress, she was instantly whisked back in time to an age where her grandmother would be the one to scold her and praise her and mold her, because her mother just didn't give a damn. However, that had been a long time ago, and Kathryn no longer needed anyone to tell her what to do. Although times hadn't changed as much as she'd thought. Her mother still didn't give a damn.

Hanging her head in feigned shame, Kathryn figured that it would be best to get it over with and act repentant, so as they could avoid the whole song and dance that came along with her being scolded. However, her head shot up in surprise at her grandmother's next words.

"How many men have you had in that bed?"

"_What_?" Kathryn was flabbergasted. No incriminating blush crept across her porcelain skin, no sudden rush of fear or light sheen of sweat. She was certainly not embarrassed that her grandmother knew she was having sex, that was a given. But the blunt questioning from the woman who prided herself on subtlety was certainly unexpected.

"You heard me, Kathryn. How many men have you fucked on this bed?" her even gaze contained an incredulous look.

"A few," Kathryn skirted, the hint of a smile playing at her lips. Was this some sort of game? Apparently not, judging by the paleness that flashed across her grandmother's face as she dropped dramatically onto the fainting chair in the corner. Rising, half-concerned and half-intrigued, Kathryn made her way to her grandmother's side but was halted with a mere glare.

"Honestly Kathryn, its one thing to fool around behind the boy's back, but in his own _bed_?"

"Says the moral center of the universe," Kathryn scoffed, casting an astounded gaze at her grandmother.

"Don't take that attitude with me, Kathryn," Isabelle snapped. "I know what's best, and it's _not_ in your best interest to give Sebastian another reason to walk out on you."

Kathryn's perfect pink mouth dropped open in surprise. "How did you know about that?"

"Cassidy may have mentioned something…" Isabelle said nonchalantly, picking imaginary lint off her designer suit.

"Well, that figures," Kathryn sneered. "She just can't mind her own business for five fucking minutes…"

"_Kathryn_! Honestly, what are you, eleven? You and Cassidy should be getting along by now. Or, you could at least better disguise your hatred."

"I don't _hate_ her," the brunette said defensively, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Well, at least _that's_ something you're good at hiding," Isabelle sneered, disappointed with her favorite grandchild. Sighing wearily, she turned back to her. "What are you doing here, Kathryn?"

"Wow grandma, it's nice to see you again, too. Yes, I've been well. And how are you feeling on this fine day?" she mocked. "Is this what you came here for, grandmere? To yell at me? I believe you could've done that by phone."

"The phone gives you the option to hang up. Besides, I thought you should experience my rage and disappointment first hand," Isabelle admitted.

"Consider it experienced," Kathryn rolled her eyes.

"So what's really going on with you and this Jason fellow?"

"Nothing. We met at that club, we danced for a little, we fooled around some, and he slept over. The end," Kathryn insisted with wide eyes.

"_The end_?"

"The END," the brunette stated adamantly.

"You aren't being fair, Kathryn," Isabelle scolded, the disappointed tone back in her voice.

"To who?"

"Cassidy," Isabelle stated incredulously, as if that was the only answer there could possibly be.

"Why do you keep bringing her up? What does she have to do with any of this?" Kathryn asked, exasperated. However, there was something in her demeanor, a pigment of truth lying exposed within her that let on that she knew _exactly_ what Cassidy had to do with all of this. And it was quite intentional.

"Jason is Cassidy's. He's not good enough for her, hell, he probably isn't even good for her, but he's her partner in crime or whatever you kids do lately. Jason is her Sebastian knockoff. She hasn't intruded on your territory, leave her be."

"_Intruded on my territory_? She hasn't _intruded on my territory_? Grandmere, she fucked Sebastian! All I did was fool around with Jason!"

Isabelle's eyes had widened at this tidbit. Still maintaining her composure, she retained her point. "Just let her be."

"Like hell!" Kathryn spat, and the look in her eyes now was not one of anger but of pure, unadulterated fury. Pacing the room like a caged animal, she stopped quite suddenly and spun on her heel, wobbling slightly but neither noticed. "I'm not five years old, anymore, grandmere. You can't put me over your knee and spank me when you don't agree with what I've done. You can't tell me what to do."

A thousand angry phrases sprung to the tip of Isabelle Merteuil's tongue, but she held it. For the first time, it seemed, she was staring into the face of the true Kathryn Merteuil. She was looking at the human, not the wax façade. She was looking into the face of anger and betrayal and infidelities and pain and suffering and vindictiveness and vindication. Surprisingly, the about-face did not make her feel any less for the girl who had been so neglected early in life only to come back later and steal the spotlight from those who had spited her. Instead, she felt an unusual sort of emotion, a mixture of pity and empathy and resignation.

"Well, I see I can't change your mind," Isabelle sighed, and she honestly wasn't sure if she wanted to anymore. She had always been a firm believer in holding the girls responsible for their actions, and what's done was done. "I just hope you remember when you're out for blood that she's of your own."

Kathryn turned to the window, looking reflectively out through the glass panes. As if she could forget.

------------------

Sebastian sat in the dark movie theatre, Juliette happily chirping away besides him as she chomped down on popcorn, but his thoughts were far from the theatre.

She had royally mind-fucked him. That was the only logical explanation, the only conclusion he could come too. He had been wracking his brain trying to figure out exactly how Kathryn convinced him to stay in, but when he voiced this to Juliette, she didn't seem to care much.

"It doesn't matter how or why, just as long as you stay," she said with a '_duh_' tone in her voice before turning away. He smiled faintly as he saw her turn in the corner of his eye. She was looking straight into the eyes of an awkward-looking teenaged boy, clearly in that state Sebastian managed to skip smoothly over.

"So, if you died right now, would they leave your braces on or take them off before they buried you?" she asked, peering curiously at the metal dental gear.

Chuckling slightly, at both her question and the boy's shocked expression, he gently detached her and whispered in her ear that you don't talk to strangers.

"Like there's anybody stranger than you," she scoffed, her eyes dancing as she elbowed him in the rib. Nevertheless, she'd mercifully heeded his advice, and the teenage boy looked immensely grateful.

Scanning the theatre in search of something more interesting than the children's movie currently playing, Sebastian's golden eyebrows raised in interest as he took in the sight. There, quite a few rows back but there was no mistaking her, was Belinda Van Ryan, one of the world's top supermodels… at a Disney movie. By herself. She didn't catch his eye right away, but it appeared that the golden girl besides him had, and she glared menacingly at the back of the child's head. If Juliette could feel the eyes boring into her, she gave no indication as she laughed shrilly at the movie. Finally grabbing her attention, Belinda smiled and winked at Sebastian before returning her interest the screen.

Now he sat at the outdoor café yet again, chewing thoughtfully on a breadstick. The child sat happily across from him, talking about the movie and laughing at the mere memories of what had happened but a half-hour ago, he couldn't shake the image of the supermodel's glare, intense with emotion. It gave him chills, and it took a lot to shake Sebastian Valmont.

He suddenly had the inexplicable urge to grab Juliette, run home to Kathryn, and lock them in the hotel suite where he could protect them all at once. Sebastian felt as if a giant rain cloud was hovering over them, and vaguely wondered if this would be the first time he and Kathryn would have to seek shelter from a brewing storm.

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_Dun dun, na na! I do believe I updated yesterday, but I just felt compelled today. My friend informed me that I have a Sebastian-complex. I like to prove people wrong. _

_Leigh: why thank you! Lol, as a matter of fact, I do have a handful of one-shots. And since I'm a shameless self-promoter, I'm going to tell you them in order of how much I like them. Haha. Okay, ready? Fade to Black is a prequel to this story. Its Katie's favorite, which is good enough for me lol. Then I believe we have a tie between The Birds, __Le Déchirement Final__, and Innocence Stolen. The Birds is my newest one, it's a Kathryn POV. __Le Déchirement Final__ is something all you K/Sers will get a kick out of. It's an Annette oriented fic, but you know what, she kills herself in the end, so I think I make up for it. Then Innocence Stolen is a Cecile's-thoughts fic (obviously OOC, as I pretended that Cecile had thoughts.) which I'm actually pretty proud of. Then there's Duplicity, my Sebastian fic. Life In A Glass House is a fic I wrote from Kathryn's mom's point of view. Lol yes, I'm getting a little out there lately. Barely Breathing is actually a songfic. And please don't ask if I recommend them. Obviously. I wrote them. Lol_

_Anonymous: Well, when you ask so nicely… lol. Sure, all is forgiven._

_Maggie: Oh, how I missed our e-mails. Yes, I lied, because I suck. This is obviously not At the Heart of It All. But before the week is through, I **promise**! _

_Babeekim: I'm glad you like angst. You'll love what's coming._

_y-x: You know, I sat here and thought to myself "What can I put here that's absolutely heartbreaking?" and The Sisterhood is the first thing I thought of lol. I actually meant to prop that in my last A/N, but most of my notes are just ranting anyway, so you know how I'd miss that. But no, Juliette wasn't inspired by Bailey, so the blonde thing was absolutely a coincidence. Julie's supposed to look like Sebastian haha. Lol well, I'm glad you're reviewing again. I thought you were mad at me haha. As for royalties… well, since I get paid in reviews, and we have most of the same reviewers, I think you're covered. Except for Maggie. We don't share her. She's **mine **from waay back in my One Tree Hill fanfic days. Hahah._

_Katie: pout hell yes, you're way too busy. _

_Ocfan108- Lol an Einstein comparison? That's very flattering. But I actually do appreciate it when you tell me what you got out of each chapter lol. It lets me know what I need to drill into the next one haha. Yes, and notice that "what's-her-face" (and I presumed you were talking about Juliette's mom there, but I could be wrong) is Camilla, and she's blonde and Christian and Annette and… oops, did I say that? Isn't Sebastian's hero gene adorable? I think so._

_Keri: Lol I'm glad that you like receiving the e-mails, because I was always worried I was irritating you haha. Yeah, the story had become a tad bit like the "Juliette show", and I wasn't offended by that at all lol. It was a conscious decision, because everybody needs to really adore her for what's to come. Sure, insert some diabolical laughter here. And I was very happy that you liked my K/S, seeing as I regard you as pretty much the master of it. (Hell no, Roger Kumble gets no claim to K/S). As is my Sebastian-complex, I realized that I was being influenced by y-x's insane K/Sness, and so I'm rebelling. K/S all the way. _

_Thanks for reading guys! _

_Xo Sam_


	20. Liars and Battle Lines

A/N: Yes, here it is. Chapter **twenty**. Can you believe I tricked you guys into reading twenty chapters worth of a story that you still don't know what the plot is?

**Breaking the Broken**

_Twenty_

Liars and Battle Lines

--

_Envy is the daughter of pride, the author of murder and revenge, the beginner of the secret sedition, and the perpetual tormentor of virtue. Envy is the slime of the soul; a venom, a poison, or quicksilver which consumeth the flesh and drieth up the marrow of the bones._

Socrates (B.C. 469-399)

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Swipe. Swipe. She made smooth stroke after smooth stroke, the shiny blood red liquid polishing into a perfect coat atop her toenails. Blowing softly, she half-heartedly attempted to listen to her agent rant, his technologically altered voice shouting from the speakerphone and filling even the tiniest corners of her hotel suite.

"Well, when exactly _do _you plan to come back?" his irritated voice rang.

"I haven't really thought about it," she said nonchalantly, fussing with her blonde curls.

"Belinda, you were supposed to be back in New York a month ago. That's when the L.A. job was done. What the fuck do you think you're playing at?"

"Personal issues arose," she tossed off, carefully making her way towards her gigantic closet.

"Belinda Van Ryan, do you even realize what this is doing to your career? Half the world is wondering where you are, what you're doing, exactly why you dropped off the face of the Earth, and why the fuck you're bailing on all your contracts!"

"Family situation," Belinda said icily, sifting through racks of designer garments until coming to rest upon her favorite of them all. Midnight black and blood red, the dress had been made especially for her by a disgruntled designer who felt that it suited her well.

An unexpected burst of laughter came through the speaker, a maniac, depraved, twisted, humorless kind of laughter. "A _family_ situation? Belinda, for fuck's sake, you don't have a family!"

Her light gray eyes turned their malevolent glare upon the phone, and the snickering promptly stopped as if Roy Kumbert could feel it on the opposite coast.

"That's the story, and so help me God, you'll stick to it," she hissed menacingly, easily pulling the slinky fabric up her toned body, smiling slightly at the memory of when she received it.

Another birthday had come and gone. Thousands of bouquets and phone calls from acquaintances had poured in, as per usual. Each and every sender hoped that somehow, she'd remember them above the rest, but they all faded into the flowery perfumed obscurity. There were piles upon piles of gifts stacked to the ceiling, but there was only one person daring enough to place something upon her bed. Opening it gingerly, just in case, because there was always the off chance that a bomb can finally managed to make its way past security. Instead, out slid the most gorgeous dress she had ever laid her eyes upon, and a little note fluttered down beside it.

_Belinda._

_As you'll notice, this exquisite garment is just your style. Black and red, the colors of hatred, death, loathing, and evil. Not convinced yet? Observe the way the straps wrap around your neck, so similar to the way a snake strangles its prey. See the little cutout in the center of the chest? That's where a normal person's heart would be. Surely you understand why it's missing in your case. Hope you enjoy. _

_Happy Birthday Belinda, you beautiful snake._

And indeed, she did enjoy. While the gorgeous blonde usually made it a policy to **never, _ever_** wear an outfit more than once, this particular dress came everywhere with her. She could never quite figure out what it was about it that made her love it so. Perhaps it was finally getting to show her true colors, subtle as it was, or maybe just a manifestation of her insides that made her see that it wasn't quite as ugly as she thought. Belinda Van Ryan wasn't quite sure, and she honestly didn't care much. All she knew was that in the dress, she felt better, and more confident, and she liked it. She felt worthy of the empty praise she had so long been received. More than that, she felt deserving of the attention she had been so long denied…

"_Blow out the candles, Belinda. Make a wish!" her mom would squeal eagerly, a tradition each year as the two of them sat around the tiny table with the entire kitchen submerged in darkness and their pale faces illuminated only by the candles. Each year, the custom seemed to lose a bit of something, the additional candle on the birthday cake shining light onto new truths. This was what her birthdays were like before, before she became 'BELINDA' and was merely Belinda. Don't see the difference? Open a top fashion magazine, and the indomitable beauty you see there is far different from the scared child who would blow out the single-digit candles. _

_"What'd you wish for, sweetie?" _

_"Dad," she would always answer simply, polishing off her cake and walking quietly back to her room, where she would wait patiently while her mother got herself back together. _

Each year had been the same, the same wishes and tears, the awkward quiet and cake that would follow. Each year it got a little brighter in the cramped kitchen, and she got a little older. It was the same every goddamn year, until the year her mother came clean. Her gift that year had been a tear-stained letter, scratch outs written all over it. It was an apology, a confession, a plea for forgiveness for the way her life had been thus far, conveniently leaving out the circumstances of her birth. It was the best gift she had ever gotten. It was the name of her father.

As anyone raised in a home where a parent has walked out knows, every child dreams of them somehow returning. They want the fairy tale, the happily ever after in which their parents fall in love all over again, get remarried and they can finally feel completely, thoroughly, exhaustingly loved. Belinda Van Ryan dreamed of this too, of finding this notorious businessman named Alain Merteuil and having her family be _whole_ for the first time in her life.

That dream was shattered into hundreds of thousands of pieces, falling all around her and recomposing her makeup. This handsome man did not give her up because he wasn't ready to have a family. He had given her away because he had an entirely different family. The angel at the foot of the stairs had proven it, the angry angel with eyes of sadness and tears that refused to flow, the weight of the world on her tiny shoulders as she floated about. She was precious, but she was the enemy. This child, so beautiful and well brought up, so surrounded on all sides by love and devotion, was the child that Belinda herself was supposed to be. Juliette Merteuil even reminded her of herself, with golden blonde curls and perfect skin and a cherubic face.

It was too bad she had to destroy her; Belinda thought with a cruel smile contorting her face as she slid lipstick across the pout that had earned her millions. Alain Merteuil and his beautiful bride had robbed Belinda of the chance for a real family. The beautiful blonde had always been a firm believer in quid pro quo.

"So that's the story you want me to sell, Belinda? Some bullshit about a family?" her agent's voice rang through her musings.

"Yeah… just tell them… tell them that there's been a death in the family."

"Alright. Stay beautiful, babe," his arrogant voice laughed, the finality of the hang up signified by the CLICK, and she was left alone again. Belinda Van Ryan, all dressed up with nowhere to go.

Dimming the lights in the room, she noted with a wry smile that the candles were nowhere near enough to brighten the room where she currently resided. A single tear ran down her cheek, as her harsh whisper resounded.

"Blow out the candles, Belinda. Make a wish!"

Both the elaborate birthday cake and the luxurious suite were plunged into total darkness. It was a place she was used to.

------------------

The light giggle could be heard down the hall, and instinct told her that she should keep him far away.

"Hey, 'Bastian, let's watch a movie!" Juliette chirped happily, her eyes darting nervously towards the bedroom door.

"Another one?" Sebastian groaned. "No, not tonight, Jules. You watch TV or something, I'm going to get changed," he began heading down the hall, heavy footsteps softened by the carpeting below. "Hey, do you smell smoke?"

"It's probably a birthday cake or something," Juliette muttered in resignation, plopping down onto the couch. Normally, she wouldn't give up without a fight but he was already almost to the door and anything else would have looked suspicious. Instead, she prepared herself for the fireworks that were sure to come.

The click was almost inaudible as the doorknob turned, seemingly in slow motion. The door swung open equally quietly.

"Are you asking me out on like, a date?" Kathryn giggled into her cell phone, looking out the large bay window towards the ocean. It was a beautiful scene, such a romantic view from the hotel room, but her face registered absolute boredom, her eyes rolled upwards to the ceiling at his attempt at being suave.

"Sure Jason, I'd love to," a malicious grin slid across her pretty face, triumph shining in her eyes, and she couldn't wait for Sebastian to get home. Victory made her very… very… _horny_…

Kathryn Merteuil soon realized that she wouldn't be waiting very long, as she spun on her heel, a certain bounce in her step. She thought maybe she'd go to the kitchen and try to eat something before Sebastian and Juliette returned, but her path was invariably blocked by the world's handsomest man with a crestfallen expression on his face. She watched, as a powerless bystander watches a train wreck, as his features hardened and in an instant he was gone. The cell phone slipped from her loose grip, Jason Argyle continuing to babble on sounding farther and farther away as she attempted to follow him to the living room, but he was nowhere to be found.

"Damnit!" Kathryn swore, and she did the only thing she could thing of: act out. Grabbing the nearest object, a crystal goblet, she hurled it against the wall and smiled slightly at the shards that tumbled to the ground. Now this was more like it, she thought, hurling more and more items about the room as _slowly_, there was more rubble than furniture. It was in this state she could be found later, hands bloody with glass particles that had never quite made their way to the wall, surrounded by a field of debris with a maniacal look in her bright green eyes as she laughed deliriously.

This was how Juliette Merteuil found her cousin, the beautiful, composed, intelligent woman she had always looked up to. Silently grabbing a washcloth from the adjoining bathroom, she sank to her knees and pressed it to the bleeding lines.

"Every fucking time," Kathryn began, a sort of dazed look about her. "Every fucking time I try to one up her, I always end up getting fucked over. How is that?"

The world 'karma' sprung to Juliette's mind, but she kept silent, curling up into a ball on her cousin's lap and allowing the older girl to just vent.

"Everything she's taken from me, and I just try to show her how it feels every once in a while, and it always comes down on me! Why the fuck does it always come down on _me_?"

"Kathryn, you have so much more than she does," Juliette said quietly, taking her cousin's larger hand in her tiny one. They were both surprised to find that the hands were nearly identical, long and thin and delicate, with bony fingers and pristine nails. "She had Sebastian for a few hours. She hasn't had him for any longer than any debutante in Manhattan, and none of them bother you."

"None of them are my family."

"True. So shouldn't you be harder on them than you are on Cassidy?"

"What are you, channeling grandmere?"

"Maybe," Juliette shrugged mildly. "I just think it's pointless to be jealous of somehow who has spent their entire life being jealous of you. All those girls get Sebastian for a little while, but you're the one he keeps coming back to."

She was staring at her again, and Kathryn felt as if her skin was crawling. Her large blue eyes were not judging, but seeing. She was pointing out the obvious in the way that only she could do, and being that open even for a moment was frightening. She was right, this six year old was absolutely right. Sebastian would keep coming back, and Kathryn could keep fucking it up, and if that didn't happen, it would be the other way around. Kathryn heaved a sigh and felt herself coming back down to earth, glancing around the destroyed bedroom in wonder.

"C'mon Juliette, let's go get ice cream."

The blonde nodded, and took Kathryn's hand to help her up, not even flinching as her blood moistened her skin. After cleaning both themselves up, they made their way down the long hallway with idle chatter as their companion. Kathryn reached out a hand to signal for the elevator when the attendant jerked to life.

"Sorry ma'am, that elevator is… otherwise occupied. This one's just fine though," he grinned, raising his eyebrows suggestively at the lift that was out of service. The Merteuil girls, at that moment, felt more connected that they ever had, as they shared the sinking feeling that they knew all too well what was going on inside that elevator.

------------------

Dawn was breaking. It wasn't the first time Sebastian Valmont had woken up curled around a stranger in an unfamiliar room. It was always pleasantly surprising when the other person seemed equally surprised though, just to break the monotony. This was the case when Sebastian Valmont awoke with his golden limbs entangled with the long pale ones of an intriguing supermodel.

Her transparent gray eyes widened in surprise as they met his ice blue ones, which looked much the same. They stared, bewildered at each other for a moment, before Belinda Van Ryan giggled slightly.

"You find this funny?" Sebastian asked, glaring at her out of the corner of his eye.

"You don't?" she laughed, wiping tears of mirth away from her eyes.

Sebastian cracked a small smile. It was a little funny, if he really thought about it. Which he didn't really care to, but he didn't have much option at the moment.

Moments later, her mirth had subsided, but the silence that descended upon them was not an awkward one. Somehow their hands had laced together, and Sebastian was absentmindedly playing with Belinda's curls as she stared back at him.

"Happy Birthday," he whispered, and she looked startled.

"How did you know it was my birthday yesterday?"

"Well, I kind of guessed. Most people don't leave half-eaten birthday cakes lying around their hotels for no particular reason," he teased.

"Hummm… you caught me there," she smiled, and looked around her room again, eyes twinkling at the sight of the red and black dress she had worn only hours ago peeking out of the closet. It was as if the garment had a curiosity all its own. "Do you have any idea how this happened?"

"Not a clue," Sebastian shrugged, searching the pockets of his discarded pants for a cigarette.

"Oh God… you know, I probably picked you up in an elevator or something. I'm such a whore," she whined, voice full of self-deprecation, and burrowed her head into the pillow, but kept one eye trained on the gorgeous boy beside her, gauging his reaction. She frowned upon seeing that he clearly agreed.

"You never did tell me what you were doing at the movies the other day," Sebastian inquired curiously, lighting the cigarette. It was the supposedly ideal image of post-coital bliss, and Belinda understood exactly what all those women flopped onto their backs for him, and she didn't regret becoming one of them in the least. However, she hadn't anticipated that he'd ask questions.

Her eyes widened for a fraction of a second in search of a good lie. "What, can't a girl go see a movie?"

"An animated movie designed for those under ten? Not usually."

"Do you want me to admit that I followed you there?"

"Honesty's the best policy," he replied with a large, fake smile.

"Okay, I did. But hear me out; I'm not like your psychotic stalker or anything. I just saw the little girl you were with and…" she trailed off, mind racing to find the most believable ending for that sentence as she felt him tense below her at the mention of the young girl. "And, she, um… reminds me of my sister. I really miss her. I know that's kind of weird," she forced herself to blush.

"Yeah, that is kind of weird," Sebastian said insensitively. There was a strange feeling growing within him, settling uncomfortably in his stomach. He recognized it instantly—it felt like infidelity, and God knows he'd had enough experience to know it when he felt it. But what was unusual was the guilt that accompanied it this time. "I think I'm going to go now."

"Yeah, you should get back to Kathryn," Belinda muttered absently.

"How do you know about Kathryn?" Sebastian froze, straightening up as he collected the last of his clothing.

"Well, everybody in the hotel is talking about you guys. Cutest couple here. Though not the most loyal. Or so I've heard," she grinned.

That was the thing about lying. If you could lie so well that even you were convinced, who's to say that it's a lie anymore? When there is no one to uphold the truth, what maintains it as fact? If you can lie sufficiently enough to convince others of its verity, you create your own reality. Any person can spin their own web of illusion; any spider can draw in its prey.

As Sebastian Valmont headed towards his own hotel room, he knew he was in store for the fight of a lifetime. He could almost visualize Kathryn, unjustified anger radiating from every pore of her body, stiffened posture and enraged eyes. He could hardly wait. He wanted them to fight, to scream, to break things. He wanted them to destroy everything around them, then maybe everything before them, and everything that had been keeping them apart. He wanted to fight because eventually they'd stop, and there'd be the calm in the eye of the storm that lulled them into a false sense of security. In those moments, they would cuddle and quip and snicker and plot, and then they would fight all over again. It was in those moments, in the peace between wars, which made it all worth it.

------------------

_Lalalailoathethischapterlalala. There was actually something else I was going to stick in here, but I decided it'd flow better with the next chapter, so forgive me if you think this seems like it's missing something lol. _

_B: Well, now you have a spoiler so gigantic I can't even describe it. I hope that'll tide you over until it actually happens lol. I took your advice on writing the Belinda POV here, which was still excruciatingly difficult, but you know that already lol, and I hope it turned out okay._

_Maggie: Lol yeah, I get possessive at times. Don't worry, you are loved haha. I don't suck? Really? Lol you'll probably beg to differ by the time I get my ass back to work on AtHoiA. _

_Babeekim: Hahaha… I'm glad that you managed to feel bad for Cassidy. I'm trying to make people see her as someone 3'D, and not just Kathryn's pathetic wannabe cousin lol. But yeah, you'll probably get jerked around a lot more in this story. I didn't want to write this chapter, but there's a ton of foreshadowing and it was really important, so I hope you'll forgive me lol._

_Katie: Angsty enough for you?_

_WashedOut: Well, I'm glad that you're intrigued lol. Let's just say that the plot thickens..._

_Keri: Lately I've been good about updating lol. Let's see how long I can keep that up. I'm glad that you liked the Kathryn/Isabelle scene, because I was really hesitant about it. And yeah, I figured it was about time that somebody gave a damn about Cassidy lol. But I do believe you owe me an e-mail… haha._

_And y-x, if you're reading this: I hope I didn't mutilate your character too thoroughly. _

_Thanks for reading, guys!_

_XO Sam_

_p.s. Read this chapter's quote **very** carefully._


	21. Act Your Rage

**Breaking the Broken**

_Twenty One_

Act Your Rage

-

War is cruelty, and none can make it gentle.

Gilbert Parker, _The Battle of the Strong_

_-_

_Heat not a furnace for your foe so hot_

_That it doth singe yourself_

William Shakespeare

-

The room was a battlefield, it seemed. Piles of broken glass peppered the floor, water stains dripped their way down the walls, flowers ripped from the safety of their vases were scattered throughout. This was far from the immaculate room Sebastian Valmont had stormed out of the night before, and in the center of it sat a disturbing placid Kathryn Merteuil.

"What the fuck happened in here?" he asked in wonder.

"Humm? Oh, yeah. The maids didn't come yet," Kathryn shrugged. She rose silently from the couch, stepping carefully between glass particles but not wincing when her feet came in contact with them. Calmly, she strode towards the bedroom, him following closely behind.

"Kathryn, I know you're pissed at me—"

"What are you talking about?" she turned around with a look of practiced curiosity upon her face. And yet, it was not only Sebastian's eyes that provided windows to his thoughts, and he could read her just as well as she him. Her eyes were blazing, and they screamed so many different things. Pleased that he'd returned, angry that he'd left, sad that it was like this, vengeful because she was Kathryn and he was Sebastian and that's just what they did. Her eyes were full and her face was empty. They were equally beautiful, and it made her almost hard to look at, but Sebastian found that he couldn't look away.

"You're going to tell me that you aren't pissed over what happened last night?"

"Why would last night upset me?" she asked, a hint of malevolence sneaking into her tone. "I got asked out by an amazing guy last night."

Sebastian could feel his jaw tense, his eyes harden, his expression freeze. He could feel his body become angry before he'd even processed what she'd said, and considered his dazed mind forewarned.

"Well, that's kind of sad," he drawled, the fire burning within him complemented by the ice in his eyes.

"How so?" her equally intense stare narrowed.

"The things you'll do to get back at Cassidy," his pouty lips contorted themselves into a self-satisfied smile. "Don't bother denying it, Kat. He's not nearly rich enough or preppy enough to be a boyfriend of yours, and we both know there's no such thing as a coincidence."

"Perhaps I do have ulterior motives, but why would this have anything to do with Cassidy?" Kathryn asked with gritted teeth, wondering how the hell she ended up fighting with just about everyone she loved over the curly haired brunette.

"He's her henchman, isn't he?" Sebastian smiled coldly, the other boy's inadequacies flashing before both of their eyes. Kathryn shifted slightly, but refused to back down now. "Honestly Kathryn, I'm surprised at you. This is probably the most amateur scheme you've come up with since junior high."

"I'm only looking to him for pleasure," Kathryn said, pink tongue lolling the words, almost seductively.

"Judging by appearances, you'll have to look further, sweet pea. But I'll ask Cassidy about it when I see her," said Sebastian.

"And when will that be?" asked Kathryn, carefully watching herself to keep in any and all evidence of anger at this new turn of events.

"Right now, if she's not busy. I think I'll bring Juliette too. Maybe we can go to the park. You know how she does so love those little family outings," he sneered cruelly, and had the distinct feeling that he'd overstepped a boundary. He was too far gone to truly care, or even notice that something broke in her eyes then.

"Are you replacing me?" she whispered. He sighed.

"Will I have to?" The question was not as it appeared. He was not asking if he needed a new partner in crime, because he knew that there would never be another Kathryn Merteuil. Instead, he was asking, veiled as it was, if she was finding someone else to care about. Was _she_ replacing _him_? The honesty in his tone took her by surprise, and that was a truly rare occurrence. For one of the first times in her life, Kathryn Merteuil had been rendered speechless.

--------------

Hesitation plagued her mind as she paused in front of the door. Juliette Merteuil was acutely aware that she was walking into a snakes' pit, but it would possibly be more dangerous to ignore the invitation completely. Swallowing this peculiar brand of fear, she entered the lounge with her head held high, dropping into a seat before the only familiar face in the darkened room. She would give anything to not know this face either, but it was one that haunted her.

"You wanted to see me?" she asked with a charming smile, but her teeth were gritted.

"Yeah. I thought it was time we got some sisterly bonding in," Belinda smiled, but hers was not nearly as agitated as the younger blonde's. Instead, it seemed almost amused, but there was a hazy air of danger emitting from her.

"Few years too late," Juliette snarled, and wondered briefly why that struck such a chord within her. For as long as she could remember, she had resented the looming presence of Belinda, a rain cloud just waiting to let loose on her parade. Writing it off as the childish desire to just have someone to bond with, Juliette remembered that she had plenty of people for that.

"Oh. I just felt like we were running out of time for that," Belinda smiled mysteriously, lowering the cigarette from her lips. "You're looking rather ill, darling."

"No wonder you're pouting in every one of your photos. You have horrible teeth," Juliette shot back, briefly fumbling for a weakness, but there was one easily accessible. The tiny blonde had learned that there were few people in the world so secure that they could withstand slights to their physique. "That could be attributed to the fact that you smoke like a chimney, but you'd think your body would be used to the blackening of organs. Your heart is that way, why not your lungs too?"

"I have a feeling cancer will allude me. We've already got a dying sister in this family," Belinda reached out and caressed Juliette's hair slightly. Her touch was a bit wistful. Their hair was so similar, golden and soft.

"I'm not dying," Juliette said simply, anger draining from her body to be replaced with a familiar cold. This was how she was more comfortable, always more composed of ice than fire. "But come near me again, and I may not be able to say the same for you."

Belinda Van Ryan was an internationally famous supermodel. She was respected and feared among her colleagues, worshipped by both men and women around the world. She had gotten into her fair share of arguments, but she had never been as taken aback as she was at that moment.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me," Juliette smiled. "I'll humor you for a second, because you've obviously been misinformed. I'm **not** someone that you can intimidate. You don't get to stalk me, to send me ominous messages, to request secret meetings in weird locations. I'm not scared of you. I just think that you're _pathetic_. You are a sad, sad human being. Do you think it's normal to be stalking a six year old? Get a life, Belinda."

"Those sound like fighting words," the older blonde marked, her tone deliberately mild, but her eyes flashed angrily. Calmly taking a sip of her drink, she observed the girl who had grown up with her father. She was Merteuil through and through, icy and poised, and though you could almost see the thoughts racing through her large blue eyes, they went too quickly to be discerned.

"That was intentional," she smiled sweetly.

"Should that be considered a declaration of war?" her light gray eyes narrowed malevolently, and Juliette's smile brightened.

"If you can justify going to war with a girl still in single digits," Juliette shrugged, mockery in her tone. "Then bring it on."

--------------

The bright side of California was the sun. As Cassidy Merteuil lounged by the campus pool in a tiny black bikini, she soaked up the sun and quite a bit of attention, and kept an ear out for the conversation of those around her.

"We're going on the Catalina trip," Michael grinned, wrapped an arm around Sheila who promptly snuggled closer to him despite the outrageous heat. Cassidy tried not to gag too loudly.

One of the more popular courses at Prestridge University had a professor who loved to try and prove that she was just _the _coolest professor on campus. None of the students were particularly impressed, but they all humored her nonetheless. A trip to Catalina had recently been organized, but with limited positions that were filling up _fast_. Michael and Sheila had been two of the first people to sign up, and looked forward to a long romantic weekend. However, Jason Argyle was looking at it as his perfect opportunity to get Sheila alone.

"Oh man," he sighed, seeming to come out of nowhere to plop on Cassidy's lounge chair in distress. She rolled her eyes behind her oversized sunglasses, but everyone else seemed concerned.

"What's the matter?" Sheila asked with concern.

"The Catalina trip's all booked up. I didn't think I'd need to join it, but my grandmother's really sick and she needs me to come see her. She lives out in Catalina, and I have no other way to get there," Jason spun his sob-story, and Cassidy could barely contain the grin tugging at her lips. His grandmother had died four years previously, but the excuse never seemed to fail him.

"Well, you could have my spot, man," Michael volunteered tentatively. He didn't want to give up his weekend with Sheila, but Jason was his friend, and he would sacrifice this for him if he really needed it.

"Really? Thanks man. My grandma will be so happy," Jason grinned, letting out a relieved sigh. Winking at Cassidy, his look seemed to imply that he had already won. Grinning mischievously back, she knew that he was quite mistaken.

--------------

Two forty-five in the morning found Patrick Bale stumbling back to his dorm room, arms full of presents bestowed upon him by Annette Hargrove at their one-month anniversary dinner. Smiling slightly at the memory, he enjoyed it a lot more than he thought that he would. When Annette had first proposed the idea, he was slightly put out. After all, a night spent with her was a night spent not cheating on her. But to his surprise, it was actually a very lovely evening. Annette was smart and funny and charming. Unfortunately, Patrick hadn't the slightest interest in any of these things. He honestly wasn't interested in anything other than what lie between her legs, but in the meantime, he'd just have to fake it.

A new task daunted him. Alison Lebray. Somehow over the last few days, they had become good friends. Patrick was slightly inclined to think Cassidy had something to do with this, but hadn't the faintest idea why. Cassidy was gorgeous and evil and hot as hell, but he didn't trust her any farther than he could throw her.

Then again, he might want to reconsider that statement, considering the infamous Merteuil dieting habits.

Cassidy Merteuil was most definitely up to something, but Patrick wasn't too worried. He had seen it in her eyes, her real target was Jason. He was just along for the ride. It would be like her lead him to Alison, if only just to spite his roommate. The only trouble was, with their newfound friendship, he had grown privy to her undying devotion to her fiancé Dave. It was a roadblock residing millions of miles away.

Patrick went to sleep that night, dreaming of Annette and Alison and victory, regardless Alison wasn't his… yet. He was well aware that you couldn't have your cake and eat it too, but you _could _have your cake and eat someone else's too. And that's kind of better anyway.

--------------

_Okay guys, I'm not sure how that turned out. I was trying to stall myself with updates because there were like two reviews for last chapter when I was going to start writing the next one, and I thought I'd hold off. Yeah, last time I do that. Horrible, horrible idea. Bye bye muse! _

_I did manage to sway some of your towards pity for Belinda. Well, except for Keri. Keri's relentless. Haha. Just kidding. Maybe..? _

_Yeah, it's becoming a hobby of mine to convince you guys to pity the people you should hate. _

_This chapter was kind of shorter, because it's really just setting the stage for the next part. I'm so excited for what's coming. Hehe.. _

_Katie: Lol yeah, your idea was right on. _

_WashedOut: Thanks ) Just wait till you see what comes next…_

_Keri: Lol well, you know, I sent you an e-mail's worth of respond/giant spoilers. Juliette pretty much shared your thoughts on their feud in this chapter. Yeah, okay, because that's going to stop them. Hahaha._

_Babeekim: Why can't they both just admit it and get the fuck over the drama? Because this is CI. Hahah. Believe me, I wish they could too, but I have a feeling I'd get slaughtered for destroying the story. _

_B: Merci beaucoup! Sorry I didn't get to you with spoilers this chapter, but things got kind of crazy for a few days. I'm back now though, and I have a **huge** spoiler, so I'll let you know lol. This chapter kind of lacked that narration because… well, I just didn't want it here lol. This wasn't supposed to be intimate, because pretty much everybody's angry. Haha. _

_Thanks for reading, guys._

_Xo Sam_


	22. Coincidence and Consequence

**Breaking the Broken**

_Twenty Two_

Coincidence and Consequence

_-_

_I can't use what I can't abuse_

_And I can't stop when it comes to you_

_Ah, you burn and burn to get under my skin_

_You've gone too far now, I won't give in_

_You crucify me but I'm back in your bed_

_Like Jesus Christ coming back from the dead_

Garbage

------------------

It was not her scene. Not even a little bit. Not even at all. As she cast a dismayed look at the sticky Formica countertops and squeaky stools, Kathryn Merteuil wondered vaguely how the hell she had gotten here. An excellent question, indeed, because Mel's Diner was not a place she would normally go. More accurately, it wasn't a place Kathryn would go if she were starving in the desert and it was the only place around for five hundred miles. But then Jason took her soft, tiny hand in his own, and it seemed a little bit better.

He had called two hours early, leaving a message that could be deciphered as more than slightly cryptic. Jason Argyle had requested that she meet him at this tiny roadside diner to 'say goodbye'. Naturally, the petite brunette's interest was peaked, and she had left the comfort of her luxury suite for the chance to have her thighs stick to her seat.

She was actually having a relatively good time, she noted with a sort of amazement. Jason was funny and charming, and a tiny part of her was glad that she had come. However, her mood was perpetually weighed down, visions of blue eyes and blonde hair and cold gazes and slumped shoulders danced in her mind, Sebastian's anger and Juliette's disappointment mingling together until they became one. One being of extreme gorgeousness and extreme emotion, beautiful as it was ugly. Kathryn couldn't shake from her mind the way Sebastian had turned away from her, anger flaring in those eyes. Even more, Juliette's scandalized glare haunted her, the way those pools seemed to flash messages clear as day.

_You're ruining everything, Kathryn._

It was as if she was warning her urgently, pleading with her to read the signals.

_You're playing with fire, Kathryn._

The way her baby cousin seemed so desperate to deter her only served to make her more determined. She was Kathryn fucking Merteuil, and nobody told her what to do. If she wanted to date Jason Argyle, she damn well would. If she wanted to hurt Sebastian Valmont and Cassidy Merteuil at the exact same time, she would.

And oh, did she ever.

If she had been a person of conscious, Kathryn would feel vague guilt at so blatantly using a person. Fortunately for her, a conscious had never been a hereditary trait in the Merteuil clan. The look in Jason's deep brown eyes, a little bit like hope and a lot like contentment, did absolutely nothing to her, and she was relieved to see that she hadn't become a person who _feels_. After spending so much time with Sebastian and Juliette, they begin to grow on you. Hours spent in the hotel room, and she could almost feel herself thawing. It was frightening, honestly, to suddenly lose the firm grasp you've held onto for your entire life, but Kathryn's nerves were soothed by the fact that she was still immune to the rest of the world.

"Hold on… so why do you think Cassidy has ulterior motives here?" Kathryn pasted a puzzled look upon her beautiful face, features contorting into an expression of concern and confusion. Sometimes she just wanted to laugh at how easy the rest of the world was played. If Kathryn had ever been concerned or confused in her entire life, it certainly hadn't been displayed visibly. If Jason were more like Sebastian, he would've known…

Kathryn could feel her resolve steeling as her gorgeous stepbrother floated to her mind's eye. She loved him and she hated him and she wanted him gone but to never leave again. Right now, she just wanted to hurt him like he'd hurt her.

"Because she's sort of mad because of a joke Patrick and I played on her at the start of term," Jason shifted a little uncomfortably, but his eyes twinkled at the memory.

"Cassidy didn't tell me about any prank," Kathryn attempted to make herself sound more concerned than curious. She was aware that Jason had most likely already read Sebastian's journal, but she just couldn't bring herself to drop the Golden Girl routine. Either way, it didn't seem like the handsome boy minded too much. Knowing guys like him, it probably turned him on.

"It's probably not something she'd want you to know," Jason laughed, "It's kind of embarrassing on her part. She pretty much got duped into fucking Patrick."

The grimy silver utensil fit the floor along with Kathryn's jaw. Her eyes were wide and impassioned, and Jason wasn't quite sure whether she was shocked or angry. However, Kathryn Merteuil had never been quite so easy to read, and peels of laughter escaped her throat. Clutching her abdomen as she hunched over, her lithe body shook slightly as she attempted to calm down.

"She did _what_?" Kathryn choked out, tears of mirth falling down her cheeks. Jason thought he'd never seen anything more lovely than this beautiful girl showing genuine emotion.

Then he wondered when he'd become such a fucking pussy.

"No, I think it's a really good idea that you seduce Sheila in Catalina," Kathryn did a complete 180 during his moments of thought, recognizing the glow of adoration and longing to put it off for as long as possible. Jason was nice, and he was hot, but he was no Sebastian. Kathryn was now serious and calculating, managing to split her mind in half as she had done so many times before. One half was focused intently on Jason and the topic at hand, as the other part whirred away with exactly how she'd use that information against Cassidy.

"You do?" Jason paused, bewildered.

"Yeah. Couples are stupid," Kathryn said, knowing from his wounded expression that her double-meaning had hit him. "I think you should definitely break them up."

"So this is Kathryn the Schemer," Jason remarked with amusement, crossing his arms over his muscular chest and leaning back against the bench. Irritability spouted up within her quite suddenly. Who the fuck did he think he was? He didn't know anything about her or Sebastian or what their lives in New York were like, no matter how many queer diaries he'd read. Speaking of, what a fucking stalker… how did he even get a copy of that? Realizing that her thoughts were carrying her away, Kathryn smiled venomously.

"You haven't seen Kathryn the Schemer until you've seen her in action."

"I plan to," Jason smirked.

Kissing her goodbye, Jason left the diner quickly after being assured that she did indeed have a way home. The trip to Catalina left in a little over an hour, and he had some last minute packing to do. It was just as well, as she had been looking for a way to leave ever since he'd decided it would be fun to ask about her past. This way, she could make him think that she still gave a damn. Jason Argyle was under the impression that upon his (hopefully) victorious homecoming, Kathryn Merteuil would be waiting there to have a _private_ party.

_You're playing with fire, Kathryn._

------------------

The pitter-pattering of little feet is what many a parent longs to hear. Though it's highly likely that your child is up to no good at the time, the sheer joy the sound seems to admit strikes a blow directly to your heart: there is a child present. All that's left of the world representing true good, genuine innocence, and a living breathing example of it is in the area.

However, the soft footsteps diligently making their way around the room were not that pitter-pattering. Instead of rough, pounding steps, there were careful and measured. Breathe intake was shallow, and she moved with such precision it seemed like she was barely moving at all. Her soft blonde curls tickled her back as they swished silently from side to side, emitting the faint scent of coconut. The tiny girl moved in the shadows, avoiding attention from all the names and faces at the gala, stealthily making her way to the bathroom, where she had last spotted her prey heading. Opening the door only a crack before sliding inside, she made certain to lift the sky-blue gown off the ground to avoid additional noise. Hiding within a stall, she waited for her shot. Juliette Merteuil wouldn't have to wait long…

Sneaking out as silently as she slipped in, she made her way back up to their hotel room. It had been an awful lot of effort to get dressed up for the five minutes she was present at the charity function, but if she had been caught, it would all be worth it. Instead, she had exactly what she needed. However, she would hold on to it for a little while longer. Years of watching and waiting had taught her that there was no greater virtue than the patience bred into her. Her first action would be completely justified. She would not make the first move. Revenge was always so much more fun than sporadic attacks, though there was really something to be said about the latter. She would lie in wait for now, waiting for her chance to lash out at her tormentor. The lion waits for the grazing animals, and so Juliette would wait for Belinda.

_Your move. _

------------------

Finally! He had finally found what he was looking for, and while Sebastian was not usually a fan of used book stores, he would suffice it this once. For years, he had been looking for a particular book, and it just figured that though he had scoured most of the world, he would find it in a second-hand store in California. He certainly looked out of place, his designer suit and dark glasses making him look far more than conspicuous amongst the dusty shelves and low-hanging reading lamps.

Sebastian Valmont had been dying for a distraction. After the spectacular demolition of his hotel room along with Kathryn's subsequent cold-shoulder, he had decided to refrain from seduction for a bit. Juliette was always amusing, but she valued her alone time. He could spend years psychoanalyzing Kathryn, but she never did appreciate it much. He'd have to turn to his first love for amusement.

Smiling fondly at the musty old hard covered book, Sebastian registered that he should probably get home before Juliette did, just so she wouldn't have to return to an empty suite. He hadn't a clue where the tyke had been disappearing to lately, but she had been gone for longer and longer periods of time lately, and her mood had been progressively worse each time. Regardless, he knew what it was like to come home and find yourself alone. He wouldn't wish that on anyone, especially not someone he loved as much as Juliette Merteuil. Bitterly, he knew that Kathryn wouldn't be home for a while.

Meandering over to the cash register, he placed the heavy book on the counter and took a moment to check out the young woman with her head buried in a book. She had wispy blonde hair pulled back into a messy bun and a cute figure.

"Oh sorry, I always get really caught up in this book. It's something my ex-boyfriend always used to read, but I never understood it," the blonde mumbled, biting her lip slightly without even glancing upward at him. A strange feeling let loose inside of him, excitement and anger and shock and disbelief, and he could feel his stomach drop. First instinct told him to back away and run _quickly_, but Sebastian Valmont found his large feet frozen to the sport as the cashier looked up at him with pretty blue eyes that were heartbreakingly familiar.

"Annette?"

"**_Sebastian_**!"

------------------

Padding softly down the hallway, these were the pitter-pattering of little feet that parents dreamed of. However, Juliette Merteuil's parents were far away, and she'd honestly prefer to keep them that way. Sebastian had arrived back only seconds after she did, a dazed look in his beautiful eyes, his curls rumpled from running his hand through it one too many times. Not allowing time for questioning, he dropped a kiss on the little girl's cheek before stumbling into the bedroom and shutting the door behind her. Golden eyebrows knitted in concern, Juliette thought she had never seen a man look so lost… not since…

Opening the medicine cabinet, she paused for a second to admire herself in the mirror before continuing with her task. Brushing her tiny pearly teeth, she briefly contemplated spying on Sebastian. Figuring he was probably sitting at the desk, staring off into space as he was prone to, the show wouldn't be too interesting. Placing her toothbrush beside the other two there, and making sure to reorganize them so they would be in rainbow order (Kathryn's toothbrush was green, and so she went first. Sebastian's was blue, the manliest color available at the time, and so he went second. Juliette's little purple toothbrush stood at the end.) Juliette reached for the translucent orangey cylinder and sigh, knowing what was to come. After fifteen minutes of struggle with the childproof cap, she finally got the pill jar open. Though her operation had been years ago, and she had gotten better in leaps and bounds, she had been continually medicated from that time until the present. Sebastian would murder her if she forgot, and though Kathryn feigned disinterest, she made casual inquiries. However, instead of the capsules shooting about the pristine bathroom as they normally would with the force behind the frail girl yanking the cap off, a single white sheet of paper fluttered to the ground. Sickly heart pounding wildly with anticipation, her trembling fingers managed to secure the note.

_Looking for something?_

_--your loving sister_

Instead of being seized by instant panic, Juliette could feel a familiar numbness sweep over her. It was as if she could feel Kathryn and Cassidy sitting on her shoulders, her guardian angels with equally twisted purposes. Stiffly exiting the bathroom, she made her way over to the fax machine in the lounge. She'd show her. Juliette was a Merteuil through and through, and her Snow White mother hadn't tainted her a bit. The ice pumping through her veins, her fractured heart circulating the same malice that had driven generations before her was going at a faster rate than every before, and she was beginning to understand exactly why Kathryn loved the carnage. Six years old, and Juliette Merteuil could almost feel the last vestiges of her goodness slip away as she placed her call.

------------------

Slipping quietly in through the heavy wooden door, Kathryn's tiny _exhausted_ frame nearly collapsed as soon as she crossed the threshold. Dragging herself to the king sized bed; she dropped lightly beside a sleeping Sebastian. His muscular arm found its way around her thin waist almost immediately, and a small smile fleeted across her lips. Regardless of how angry she was at him, she would always feel for him in the way she was scared shitless to feel for anyone else. Cautiously brushing a soft kiss against his cheek, Kathryn froze as she felt his hand move. She could've sworn he was asleep…

His breathing was steady and shallow, eyes moving slightly beneath their lids. His pouty lips were slightly parting, and his bare chest rose a bit with each breath he took. However, contrasting with his peaceful rest was his hand, which was slowly undressing her.

Staring incredulously, she wondered exactly how far he was planning on going with his, consciously or not. As his fingertips brushed against the lace of her bra and panties set, his calloused hand stopped roaming. Snuggling closer to her, Sebastian wrapped his arms around her as his head dropped to her neck. Feeling his curls tickle her slightly, Kathryn allowed herself a single smile before drifting off to sleep. Thoughts raced in her mind of exactly how long they could live like this, at peace at night and at each other's throats during the day. It was a vicious cycle they had yet to break, but for now she would just enjoy the feeling of his arms around her when he wasn't awake to see her raw. You never know how long it will last.

------------------

_Dun dun dun… hahaha. _

_I was actually **very** pleasantly surprised that I had some new reviewers last chapter! Hey guys, welcome to Breaking the Broken, I hope I'll keep hearing from you._

_Arrowhead-water: I'm glad you thought that my transition between the two movies worked. To my knowledge, this is the first crossover story, which is really weird to say. But, you know, I don't know anything. There could be a whole website devoted to CI and CI3 crossovers, and I just think I'm original. Hahah. Anyway, I'm glad that you liked it._

_CheeryJana: Thanks! Never fear, I'll be writing this story for quite a while. Hell, I don't even know **how** to end it; it's like **part **of me now. So until I find something else to obsess over, yeah, this story continues haha. _

_WashedOut: Hehe. Yes, we shall see…_

_Babeekim: Believe me, my heart belongs to K/S. But hey, a little drama never hurt anybody…_

_y-x: Thank you very much lol. There's a gigantic twist coming up in that storyline that I'm like giddy over. Nobody will see it coming…_

_Katie: Lol as I told you, the "having your cake and eating someone else's too" line was written with you in mind. This isn't the chapter where I secretly kill every A/S fan… **this** isn't…_

_B: Yep, Juliette's all Merteuil, and she's about to show Belinda that Kathryn's not the only one with claws. I'll definitely e-mail you spoilers later because I was just about to say something but I don't want to destroy the plot for everybody else lol. I'm always so happy when I manage to shock you lol._

_Keri: Yeah, Kathryn's definitely going to get more integrated with the other storylines playing out. This chapter was actually a step in that direction. Lol I'm glad that you liked the last chapter title… nobody ever seems to notice them. I'm pouting now. (just thought I'd let you know, because you can't see me.) How creepy is Patrick? **Very**. Muah ha ha…_

_Thanks for reading, guys!_

_Xo Sam _


	23. You Thought Wrong

**Breaking the Broken**

_Twenty Three_

You Thought Wrong

_--_

_But how could I miscalculate?_

_Perfect eyes will have perfect aim_

_If I could chose_

_It's only you_

Brand New

----------------

It was peaceful, as were all the suites in the luxury hotel. Each designed in a different style, they were all done in colors that could only be described as soothing. Upon stepping into the massive hotel room done in various shades of blue, an odd sense of calm swept over the person. However, the calm was about to shatter into thousands of prickly pieces, each wielding their own sharp edge. It all started with a knock at the door.

Tall and blonde and visually flawless, the expression on Belinda Van Ryan's face was far less placid than that of the room. Making her way to the door, she flung it open unceremoniously, a fiery glare blazing in her pale, pale gray eyes at having her leisure time interrupted. The other side of the door revealed someone equally livid.

Once good-looking, his appearance had faded into a shadow of what he had once been. Dark hair going light, receding slowly, hair line retreating as it admitted its defeat against the inevitability of old age covered the dome of his head. A toned body gone to waste, his stomach protruded slightly over his belt, the buckle of which was ridiculously large and expensive, and Belinda could barely keep herself from spitting at it. It was probably ripping her off that had paid for it. Furious brown eyes bore into hers. Resting her hand on her thin hip, her perfect pink mouth opened to demand an explanation when he thrust it at her. The Post, with a crease down the middle. Smiling faintly, the gorgeous blonde knew that he had probably seen whatever was so important and hopped right onto the next plane.

"Roy, so nice to see you again. Please, do come in," she sneered as the man pushed past her.

"No time for sarcasm Belinda. Read the damn article."

Casting a disinterested gaze at the front page, her translucent eyes darkened as her jaw dropped open, seeing her own image stare back at her. Large black letters mocked her, the image never blurring as unexpected tears rushed to her gray irises.

**BELINDA VAN RYAN: THE NEW KATE MOSS**

_Supermodel Caught With Cocaine at Charity Fundraiser_

Long before she had traced her own bloodlines there, Belinda had heard of the Merteuils. The blonde had envied them, each and every one of them. They were rich and they were beautiful. They had more money than they could possibly spend, and they were all perfectly composed. Each one had always seemed unflappable, a quality she longed to emit. She had worked diligently at it, and made great progress. There was not much left in the world that could shock Belinda Van Ryan.

Numbly tracing her own photograph, details of which remaining painfully clear right down from her gorgeous silk dress to the spoon near her nostril, she realized that she'd have to adjust that assessment.

It sprang from within her, hot and bubbling, churning within her barely-existent stomach. Her head spun, her jaw clenched. This was what her mother had told her about. She wasn't a Merteuil, not really, no matter what she did. She could not close herself off the way a real member of the esteemed French family could, she couldn't just isolate portions of herself. Throughout her life, Belinda Van Ryan had moved as a whole being, acutely aware of everything going on around her and feeling it reverberate within. To be a Merteuil meant to separate your parts, to remove the ones that ail you, to float through life in a selectively permeable membrane, only letting in what you could handle and holding at bay what you couldn't. Her mother had always told her it was better this way, pain was all part of being alive. Belinda knew that her mother was right, in a tiny, tucked away part of her heart. She knew she was right, but she didn't care.

Fury and horror pounded messages to her brain, her narrow feet pounded against the floor in time. A whirling dervish of blonde curls and gray satin flitted around the room, broken glass and radiating anger in its wake. In no time at all, she was in the bathroom, and while smashing the porcelain and glass seemed an appealing option, she had something far more damaging in mind.

"Hey B, I didn't know you read _Cruel Intentions_," her agent, Roy Kumbert, called from the living room. In her mind, she could picture him lounging on the couch, casually flipping through the copy of the journal that had sat on the coffee table. She could imagine his feet propped up on that same exquisitely carved table, his grubby fingers contaminating everything in her makeshift sanctuary. God, how she loathed him.

She merely grunted in response, but he ploughed on. "I've read this before. It was sad, wasn't it? I always felt bad for that Annette, She finally found someone to spend her life with, someone she loved and that loved her back, only to have him ripped away. I'm glad that Kathryn bitch got what was coming to her, though. It's definitely not normal to be in love with your brother."

"Stepbrother," Belinda muttered involuntarily,

"Anyway, it was pretty fucking cool that they both got what was coming to them in the end, wasn't it? I love the irony that they both lost what they loved most—she lost her reputation, and he lost both his life and his car. They had it coming," he boomed pompously, and she couldn't help it—she glared at the wall, imaging he was there.

"If you say so," she chimed through gritted teeth, rattling through the cabinets. Her eyes lit up as she found them, carefully unsealing the bag and sliding the numerous tiny white pills onto her palm. Slowly, a malicious grin curling the corners of the lips that had gotten her so far in life, she plucked one out of her soft hand, and plopped in into the toilet. Watching the tablet sink slowly, the water rippling around it, rising and falling gently, she hardened at the edges as it began to dissolve. Dropping one after another into the basin, she went through the pile quickly. Crouching against the bathtub, her gray eyes took in the sight, a minefield of medication in a dissolving haze.

She had miscalculated. Aiming for the obvious weakness, she had snatched the medicine of the child struggling with her health. Belinda had never realized that there were so many worse ways to suffer. Flushing and watching with slight glee; Belinda Van Ryan took in the sight of heart medication swirl to its imminent demise, and relished her slight victory. The blonde had ever contemplated slipping it back, waiting just long enough to make sure her sister had gotten the message. However, she didn't grasp that if dead, you would suffer no pain. If still alive, everything could be stripped from you and you would feel the loss all too brilliantly.

"Belinda, somebody just slipped this under the door," Roy dropped a small sheaf of paper, and it fluttered to the floor beside her. If he noticed anything amiss, he didn't let on.

"_Reputation, reputation, reputation! O, I have lost my reputation! I have lost the immortal part of myself, and what remains is bestial."_

_-William Shakespeare_

_In case you don't know who Shakespeare is, he wrote plays. I would so hate to underestimate your intelligence but… well, you are a model. _

_J.A.I.M_

The note sealed it. Her failure was a slap in the face; its sting felt full-force. The gorgeous blonde who had the world at her feet had only a small condolence. While her heart felt as if it was bleeding, at least it wasn't failing.

----------------

He stirred slightly, motion activating through his unwilling tan limbs. Groaning slightly, Sebastian Valmont wondered what he was doing up at this time. The room was cast into darkness, a pitch-black cloak veiling its contents from view, and just the smallest sliver of light fought its way through the drapes. Heavy, just beautiful enough to not be tacky. Shaking his golden curls out of his eyes, he registered that it was nearly 10:30, and was not that early at all…yet the room gave the illusion of midnight. Those were some really awesome drapes.

Rising just a little bit, he tried not to wake the restless form of Kathryn Merteuil. Small little circles were forming beneath her eyes, delicate shadows playing across her face, and he tried to remember when she had come in the night before. His arm was wedged tightly under her scantily clad form, and though it was losing feeling, he didn't mind.

"It used to be kind of an exercise, you know?" she spoke, her voice a little hoarse. Kathryn hadn't turned to look at him, hadn't even given an indication that she was awake. It was one of the things Sebastian loved most about her, the way she lived for surprise. Kathryn Merteuil was never one to come with a preamble, to ease into something. She would always dive right in, if only because she could.

"What's that?" he mumbled sleepily.

"Remembering stuff," she admitted, keeping her bright gaze stubbornly trained on the opposite wall. Her spine was pressed against his chest, his large hand intertwined with her small one, but her head remained forward.

"Like what?"

"Your voice. Juliette's scar. Cassidy's perfume," Kathryn sighed. "Stupid stuff. But I figured that if I could keep all the memories in tact, when I got out of Methadone, I could just live again. I could stay alive in there if I could remember all the details."

"And could you?" Sebastian prodded, intrigued at this new turn of events. It was always the dark that made Kathryn's emotions come alive, those elusive things that she ignored the existence of in the presence of daylight. Too tender to be seen, they were only to be voiced in the dark of night.

"Perfectly," a tiny laugh escaped her throat, though it was clear she found nothing amusing. "I could hear you when you were angry, happy, smug, turned on. I could even imagine her scar fading a little bit as time went on. Hell, I could even remember what Cassidy smelled like if she was wearing perfume and we'd had filet mignon for dinner."

"Why does that upset you?"

"Because it doesn't mean a damn thing," her tiny frame turned quickly, her gaze locking with his. He didn't ask her to continue, but curiosity oozed from him.

"It doesn't matter whether I remember it or not, because they exist either way. It doesn't matter if I can recall Juliette's scar. It still exists, and it still fades, and she's still growing. It never really mattered if I could still hear your voice, because I thought I would never hear it again. And now that I know I will, I can hear it anytime," said Kathryn. "The world kept spinning while I was locked up, and now everything's changed, regardless of the fact that I remember exactly how it used to be."

"It's not that different, Kat," Sebastian soothed.

She didn't answer, just curling into him. He stroked her hair, knowing that in a few hours, they would both be up and about and this moment would never be spoken of again. She was right, he knew. It didn't mean a damn thing. But he would cling to it anyway.

----------------

Exhaust fumes contaminated the air around them, and Cassidy briefly wondered if she could sue the school for any ensuing damage. Probably not. As the buses for Catalina prepared for their departure, Sheila and Michael were exchanging a tearful goodbye, while Cassidy and Jason stood awkwardly to the side.

"No kiss for me?" the handsome boy taunted, and she threw him a sharp look.

"No thanks. I don't know where your lips have been," Cassidy smiled sweetly, then feigning a look of dawning. "Actually, I **_do_**. Possibly scarier."

Snickering cruelly, the brunette surveying the courtyard behind her. Most of campus had showed up to see the trip depart, if only for the sake of having something to do. Over in a shadowy corner, perched on a bench surrounded by low hanging tree branches, her sharp eyes could make out the form of Annette Hargrove snuggling with Patrick Bale, her boyfriend of a few weeks now. Interesting.

Sheila's sob broke her trance, and Cassidy refocused her attention on the couple at hand. Watching the way Michael's hand lingered on hers for as long as possible as Jason guided Sheila towards the bus, she thought perhaps this would be a little harder than she thought. Giving him a strictly platonic, comforting hug, she felt his hand briefly brush against her tight ass.

Then again, maybe not.

Jason's cocky gaze caught hers as the bus began to pull away. He was confident, as he began to roll slowly away from Prestridge University, that this weekend could bring him everything he wanted. Only feet away, rooted to the spot with an evil glimmer in her cold brown eyes was a person who thought quite the opposite.

----------------

_Yeah, there's really no excuse for why I haven't updated for the past week. I've just been kind of busy. Well, I'm back, and you can expect quite a few updates during the next week because I've got a few days off. Unless, of course, I'm neglecting you to finish **Beyond Good and Evil**, because I've only got two weeks to do so. If that is the case, please e-mail, don't crucify. Thanks in advance._

_Maggie: You might just get your amusement. Hint? Perhaps. I'll get to AtHoiA eventually, but I've got finish BGaE somehow. I'm thinking maybe I'll give that story a sequel, because I'm really kind of in love with it. So obviously I just kind of spoiled the ending for you, namely that it isn't like the movie lol. E-mail me with your thoughts lol._

_B: Lol, you caught me. I just love sticking these guys in random spots. I really can't stop myself. I'm not sure why you're channeling Christian rock while reading this, but whatever floats your boat I guess…_

_WashedOut: Hehe. Thanks._

_Nicole: Merci._

_Arrowhead-water: Oops. I failed in updating quickly. Hopefully that doesn't bump me from your good side haha. Thank you for your kind review, and you're damn right Kathryn still wants revenge._

_CheeryJana: You'll be curious for a wee bit longer._

_Keri: Lol yeah, nobody wants Jason… for the time being. It's a little bit sad. The wall's on its way down, but the war's just heating up. Muah ha ha. _

_Katie: Lol I'm guessing you could pick out which character in this chapter represented A/S fans everywhere. Notice the play on his name? Lol think WRITER WE DESPISE. I'm flattered that I go in your non-existent quotes book. Haha_

_Thanks for reading guys. I love hearing from you._

_Xo Sam_


	24. Very Important Very, Very, Very

Well, hi there.

In case you forgot who I am, I'm Sam, and I write this little story lol.

As you may have guessed, I completely pulled a Keri over the last few months, lol. I was planning on returning to writing this a few months ago, but then drama reared its ugly head, and I managed to get myself into a really bad accident.

I should've mentioned early that I'm Sam, and I'm clearly a karmic monster. I was definitely one of those sirens that lured the sailors onto the rocks and then killed them. I'm kind of pissed with my friends for agreeing with me on that. But that is neither here nor there.

I've uprooted myself and am now residing on a completely different coast from the one I call home, because we all decided that it would be best for the whole recovery process thingy. Now that I've settled in some, and am on the road to recovery, I think I may be able to give this another shot relatively soon.

I wanted to write this before I even attempted to get back to chapters because I feel terrible that I left ya'll hanging for so long. Everything just took a turn for the crazy, but I thank those of you who read it and loved it.

Now my question is, would anybody actually be interested in me continuing this?

Please respond and let me know.


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